Targeted Individuals: 144k : Special? 🙏

I’m probably going to get some shit with this but I’ve ran through enough of the spiritual community and i will say this right now, people are out here playing on trends to get money or fame.

First it was like alien abductions and ghosts like back in the day right, then earth angels, past lives as kings and queens and gods or goddesses…. then lightworkers and indigo children then rainbow crystal children ……. Then it was starseeds alien dna. Then it was TWIN FLAME and holy union and once everyone jumped off THAT shit show of a bandwagon, its then 144k (God’s chosen) ….. And i mean yo! ….. Thats not naming all of the trends. With in the “awakened” community.

I have found that more men seem to be talking about the 144k than say women who spoke about twin flames.

Maybe im not impressed because im a regular degular ….. No special super powers other than a big mouth and some skepticism.

Like everyone running around here wanting to EXTRA EXTRA special. People out here thinking they are straight up prophets because of this 144k trend. But like 2 years ago people swore they were the goddess Isis in a past life….. Or Jesus and longing for their narcissistic twin flame to come into union.

Like dudes have you ever wondered if this is all the Devils LIES to fuck with your mind and inflate your ego?

I dropped COINS on “spiritual services”…… And honestly no one has fixed my situation….. But they took my money that is for sure. They may have UNDERSTOOD my situation being demonically targeted or a twin flame or whatever it is but no one was able to fix it and thats why i went to them. I didnt need a hug….. I needed for my body to stop burning! But these are lightworkers that are suppose to have special powers so why didnt it work?

Honestly the explanation that i heard about the 144k was that it was actually the innocent children that they killed looking for Jesus (here for the video). That made sense to me for some reason. That those children will rise up as like new angels and be in God’s spiritual army. But many think its the rapture of 144k and the current bloodline of the 12 tribes and like souls will be sucked out the body and sent up to heaven. Uuuuummmmm Idk. Im just saying. Children are special and to me it makes sense that the innocent children that were slain in the name of Jesus (Gods son) rise up as angels. But what do i know?

Honestly most of the people out here are DEEP in not just their ego but ALTER EGO. I mean if it gets you through the day to think past life you were Isis or Jesus or an Angel …alien… Ect i mean go for it, but recognize it for what it is. Honestly people always called me an Angel and i let that shit get to my head when these demons were attacking me.

So i am open to being wrong…… I honestly know for a fact these demons will play both sides. God, Devil, Alien, Angel, Goddess, telepathy, Government…… Whatever they can convince and confuse your ass with. Its a slippery slope playing with energies you dont REALLY understand or knowwhat they are. You don’t have the eyes to really see them. And if you do ….. The devil is a lie and illusions are real. I have seen the same beings (negative) turn into bright lights (which i think we associate with good ones) and have seen the same ones turn to the blackest black to hide in a corner. So….. What can you trust?

While I identify with the targeted individual community as a shared experience……. I am having a difficult time saying its because i am a Twin Flame or a Lightwoker or 144k. And i am not that paranoid to think its the government. I mean but if the government wants to watch me wipe my ass all day…… That’s their issue. I just need the dial turned down on the fryer.

A lot of that stuff is distractions from our eyes being on God and giving praise. I am not going to even lie….. Like im seriously struggling feeling stuck in the demonic torture situation and i talk aboit it a lot to cope. But im trying to talk myself out of the ego and the bullshit…. And just want to get back to joy and being of service to humanity and growing in God.

Just saying. Be careful out here. Keep it simple keep it pure.

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Spiritual Bypassing Revisited. 😲😲😲

So spiritual bypassing. 

We are basically saying that if you don’t get almost literally spiritually jumped and cosmically punched in the face that you don’t get the badge of honor of being “inept”. To………… What? 

Do y’all see how we are perpetuating abuse even through our spiritual communities. 

We allow these “spirits” entities to cause harm and then run around thinking its an honor….. And we are enlightened. 

GUYS FUCK THAT!

FUCK THAT TODAY AND TOMORROW AND FOREVER FUCK THAT!

Basically you are enabling cosmic spiritual bullying.

And we are suppose to grow from that?!

Think about how fucking backwards that is? 

Its perpetating abuse.

If someone is in an abusive relationship do you tell them to stay in the relationship and forgive them while they are being beat? 

A lot of these people going around talking about accept the dark and light…. And spiritual bypassing never been raped by some random ass entity and then being told to forgive them. Forgiveness is a process. And protecting ones self is the first step. Abuse stopping is the first step. 

And forgiveness is a choice. 

I’ve always been like this. Ever since school. School is forced… Information forced…. Most of its a lie to perpetuate ignorance. Most of its not useful and most what actually learn and find useful is on the job you are forces to engage in to survive. 

Let’s really rethink the spiritual concepts we spew out. All we are doing is excusing entitities, energies, demons, whatever to play a roll in our lives, and there shouldn’t be any. They made their choice. And they keep making their choice the more you allow them to “punish” or abuse us senselessly which only enables their bad behavior.

Its not a badge of honor….. It’s ignorance. 

🙏

“Archon Mind Parasite Self-Defense”

This video is interesting and grounding. 

1. While I truly enjoy understanding the “chakra system”, I believe it is a great way of understanding and bring mindful of the part of our body. I also do not truly believe we have 7 cones of energy. I think it can be a good way to understand organs and parts of the mind by compartmentalizing these idesas but not as an actual system. The concept is fine….. But diving deep into the illusion of being some super human is where we get caught by these Entities. 

We are electromagnetic, this is true. We have metals in our body. But how that actually looks I have no idea. 

2. As stated these beings will pretend to be anything of authority. And will play off of both bad and “positive” emotions or words to control. So it really is a double edge sword. So I have narrowed the single most important thing is ignorance. Lack of awareness will have you pulled in so many different directions. Happy sad angry. So when we are aware that these being are trying implant mistrust or fear anger or even manic happiness we are not in control. 

3. More recently I “saw” visuals that were not visions of “light” that looked like a couple of different things. One looks like maybe 20 circles inside of each other, another like jellyfish lights, others are sparks of “light” or globs of colorful “energy” that looks like its leaving my being . This is false light , this is not real light. It is not coming from the sun, or a lamp. I doubt it is coming from me. But even if this “light” is coming from me, the fact that it is being tampered with to create “light” is still false. So be careful of being lured by “the light”. All that glitters is not gold.

4. Between being in spiritual forums and schizophrenic forums to just everyday interactions it is very easy to see how we are all affected. Its easy to observe.

5. I have no idea how to get rid of these things. Again prior to being “attacked” I was on an organic diet and fairly happy with only a break up that rattled my spirit. However prior to this full fledged experience, I can recall up until the age of 15 where these beings have been around me. Or have acted as “spirits” of loved ones, or “angels” or supposed “spirit guides. Being young, i just accepted it as such cause i didnt know any better. Movies, religion and so on talks about spirits, angels, demons, ect so it is socially acceptable. I moved on with my life. But this ignorance, because no that was not my deceased grandma or grandpa, and no that flash of light was not an angel trying to help you, that ignorance is what comes to haunt me later.  

Don’t get me wrong, that idea of believing in angels or the spirit of our loved ones “being with us”, there is nothing wrong with this idea. If we want to embody the archetype idea of an angel is fine,if we want to comfort ourselves with the idea of our deceased loved ones looking down on us or living on “through us” as a form of ancestry that’s fine. Poetic of sorts. But these ideas can also be manipulated by these beings. In fact anything can if we don’t have our Witt’s about us. 

So again its not a clear cut answer.

Lol but if I find one I will surely let you know. For now I am careful what I believe and keep things simple. Because these parasites are always trying to drag me into a storyline so they can position themselves in a place of power rather than what they really and truly are. 

I Deserve This

Its Demon/ Shadow Entity whatever. Pretty simple …. There is no going back from this. There is no SURPRISE I was your angel spirit guide all along pushing you to what? Quit your job, ruin ever relationship, gain 100lb and sleep all day. There really is no coming back from this on any level. 

There is no prize, The demon tried to encourage me to keep going through the experience because in the end I would get my ex back or, be a better person, or some magical awakening ability. No there is no light at the end of this tunnel. You don’t get a prize for enduring pointless visions of child abuse or feeling like your brain is being sucked through a straw. There is no “upgrade” as we are designed as we should be. And I’m pretty sure any evolutionary changes would be extremely slow or generational. 

I deserve this, I clearly have done something to deserve this. Whether it was being disrespectful to my parents when I was young, being gay (who knows), having to to do sex work to survive, doing a few drugs, I might have borrowed/ stolen a couple things in my life. And while I try for the majority my hardest to be honest, I’ve definitely told some lies in my life. 

There is something I did to deserve this. Known or unknown. Do I feel like the punishment fits the crime, whatever it is….. No. But clearly that doesn’t matter. I did something or a couple of things that warrants demons being unleashed on me…. What they do from there… I guess is up to them and its not about being fair. Or balanced, or even learning a lesson at this point. I can’t even find the lesson in all of this because its just too much torture and confusion. Getting a lesson is for our own sake. It is our way of making peace. There is no prize, no lesson. 

This doesn’t excuse or make up for anything I have done. Enduring this doesn’t excuse what I have done in the past to deserve or contract this. This doesn’t wipe the slate clean. This doesnt purify. There is no lesson. Just abuse. 

There is no new age path, story or fantasy that applies. There is no cure. 

Even if my prayers and wishes came true and this Demon(s) *poof* magically went away, there is always the chance that it will come back and either try to ruin my life or make it even worse when I am down. There is no guarantee that this Demon will never come back and be gone forever.

No one will ever love me with this demon around. 

So it doesn’t matter. Nothing I do matters. 
Broken.

Lightworkers Victimizing Victims

So someone added me to a few “light worker healer groups” on Facebook.

The fuckery I have observed from many of the people who claim to be light workers is sub par. I in no way claim to be a light worker FYI. At best I simply was looking for answers…. At most sharing and trying to be an ear for other people to know they are not alone.

Many of these light workers will pounce on anyone who is “negative” saying 

  • “You are not a real light worker!”
  • “you are not of the light”
  • “You are too negative/toxic!”
  • “You just want attention”

The list can go on and on and on. What most see as attention seeking and negative. I see as a cry for help. One guy who claims to to be a “light worker” interjected in my comment to a poster who claimed he hated his life. His English wasn’t amazing and I understood what he was feeling. I get it. The “light worker” called me an idiot and went on calling me names because I responded to the poster. And told him life does suck and you’re not alone, but I need you stay strong. 

These “light workers” who believe they are ordain by some Arch Angel to go around blessing people like they are Jesus Christ is fucked up. It’s an ego trap.

And while the same can go for the “Shadow Side” from those who believe they have been bestowed with great knowledge by from random ass God of the underworld cause they read fucking emerald tablets…. Need to check themselves as well. When they go about threatening people online “you really don’t know who you are messing with!” Like gonna send some voodoo. Why would you send voodoo over an online spat?

If ANY of y’all were that big and bad then why hasnt anyone really stopped some of the terrible things happening in the world.

Like all I see is egos. And its exhausting. And no one seems to know shit. And we use the light or the dark to exert control over someone or a situation. To feel justified in out petty judgments. 

Its like who is level headed enough to like chill?

The same person who is thinks they are talking to Arch Angel Micheal will be the first to chalk me up to schizophrenic when i am am honest and their “light magic” doesn’t work. Really? Wouldn’t you sense that was the case from the begining and not take my money?

There are people who are deeply hurting in this world. Various reason. Countless. Some don’t even know why. Any time someone expresses themselves that doesnt make these light workers feel good. Then you are automatically labeled as “of the dark”.

I have both experienced and seen “light workers” victimize victims. Don’t get me wrong I’m a straight forward kind of person. I don’t need fluffy language. And maybe I am expecting to much from “light workers” who claim to be apart of that compassionate life. 

But shit y’all.

I have been fighting every day of my life the best way I know how. And I have people over here telling me I haven’t taken enough salt baths…. Or eaten enough fruits…. Or prayed enough…. Or this was my fault… From some past life I know nothing about. That there IS a reason. When I am neck deep in it and have yet to find a justifiable reason for me OR many of our people.

Victimizing people who are attacked spiritually….. Is fucked up. Taking their money to chalk it up to depression is fucked up. Feeding them some bullshit past life story is fuck up. And watching your ego and face change when you don’t get the gratification of “helping” someone so you dismiss them like trash IS FUCKED UP.

No wonder I chose an alien as my alter ego. 

I will never understand this world. 

Lightworkers Victimizing Victims

So someone added me to a few “light worker healer groups” on Facebook.

The fuckery I have observed from many of the people who claim to be light workers is sub par. I in no way claim to be a light worker FYI. At best I simply was looking for answers…. At most sharing and trying to be an ear for other people to know they are not alone.

Many of these light workers will pounce on anyone who is “negative” saying 

  • “You are not a real light worker!”
  • “you are not of the light”
  • “You are too negative/toxic!”
  • “You just want attention”

The list can go on and on and on. What most see as attention seeking and negative. I see as a cry for help. One guy who claims to to be a “light worker” interjected in my comment to a poster who claimed he hated his life. His English wasn’t amazing and I understood what he was feeling. I get it. The “light worker” called me an idiot and went on calling me names because I responded to the poster. And told him life does suck and you’re not alone, but I need you stay strong. 

These “light workers” who believe they are ordain by some Arch Angel to go around blessing people like they are Jesus Christ is fucked up. It’s an ego trap.

And while the same can go for the “Shadow Side” from those who believe they have been bestowed with great knowledge by some random ass God of the underworld cause they read fucking emerald tablets…. Need to check themselves as well. When they go about threatening people online “you really don’t know who you are messing with!” Like they are gonna send some voodoo. Why would you send voodoo over an online spat?

If ANY of y’all were that big and bad then why hasnt anyone really stopped some of the terrible things happening in the world?

Like all I see is egos. And its exhausting. And no one seems to know shit. And we use the light or the dark to exert control over someone or a situation. To feel justified in out petty judgments. 

Its like who is level headed enough to like chill?

The same person who is thinks they are talking to Arch Angel Micheal will be the first to chalk me up to schizophrenic when i am am honest and their “light magic” doesn’t work. Really? Wouldn’t you sense that was the case from the begining and not take my money?

There are people who are deeply hurting in this world. Various reason. Countless. Some don’t even know why. Any time someone expresses themselves, that doesnt make these light workers “empaths” feel good. Then you are automatically labeled as “of the dark”.

I have both experienced and seen “light workers” victimize victims. Don’t get me wrong I’m a straight forward kind of person. I don’t need fluffy language. And maybe I am expecting to much from “light workers” who claim to be apart of that compassionate life. 

But shit y’all.

I have been fighting every day of my life the best way I know how. And I have people over here telling me I haven’t taken enough salt baths…. Or eaten enough fruits…. Or prayed enough…. Or this was my fault… From some past life I know nothing about. That there IS a reason. When I am neck deep in it and have yet to find a justifiable reason for me OR many of our people.

Victimizing people who are attacked spiritually….. Is fucked up. Taking their money to chalk it up to depression is fucked up. Feeding them some bullshit past life story is fuck up. And watching your ego and face change when you don’t get the gratification of “helping” someone so you dismiss them like trash IS FUCKED UP.

No wonder I chose an alien as my alter ego. 

I will never understand this world. 

🌹 Forgiveness + Understanding 🍃

As I said before in a previous post. I didn’t do anything to deserve this. 

Much like people who have “done me wrong”, I try to understand them. I might “demonize” them in the beginning because I need to get out of the situation that doesn’t feel good, but soon at some point my mind tries to figure things out…. What did I do? What did they do? How can I do things differently in the future?

So now I am in a situation, where I hear and feel and see some “entity”….. But I can’t truly prove it (even with recordings someone will say its doctored), I can’t defend myself, and I’ve never truly seen it. Only images/ visions. 

I’ve tried to understand from almost ever perspective. I try to understand why this entity (much like the other people in my life, friends, family, lovers) hurt me. Usually this leads to compassion and letting it go either the issue or the person.

But I truly tried to figure this one out. Why I did this entity attack? What did I do to allow this to happen? What is IT? Why is this happening to so many people all over the planet?

The only thing is that…. I can’t let it go. I don’t know how to. And it will not let me go. And I just lay here waiting for that day….. And wasting my life listening and feeling crazy shit all day.

As much as I would like to say it was past life, or karma, spirit guide, awakening or whatever…. I can’t. Yea the each have been woven into a grand “storyline” to distract me from the main question.

Why did you hurt me?

Each day it makes less and less sense. And I just have to be OK with that. Because it never truly does. 

Update I posted in a forum:

“In forgiveness there must be understanding …. And through compassion from understanding …. Are we able to achieve true forgiveness…. Because we see ourselves in them.”
How to do you heal and forgive in a lie?

More on Karma

So I kinda went off on these guys in a “spiritual forum” that’s reeks of misogany about Karma. This one dude had the nerve to say the Atlantic Slave Trade was a “karmic lesson”. And I am over here speechless. But do I keep my mouth shut? NOPE!

As I said before if we use the concept of “karma” to be more mindful of each other, ourselves and the planet and how we effect each other cool. When we say let “karma” take care of it…. We are standing back and allowing OURSELVES to take the “higher road”. Does that mean karma will be administered? We don’t know. If karma,in the negative sense is administered do we reveal in it? Find satisfaction? 

But this whole idea of Karma and past lives is kinda insane. Like I’m the last one that should be talking about sanity since I’m “schizophrenic” demon possessed n shit…. But….. This is what I DONT get.

You had some past life “vision” about whatever. Who facilitates Karma? Who decides what or what level of karma one receives? If that …. Whatever/ Whoever it is …. Has the ability to enforce karma….. To be just and fair…. Then why don’t they have the ability to STOP the cycle in its tracks??? Stop the suffering? Hmmm?

Eye for an Eye? 

“Soul growth”?

Like fuck out of here. If suffering is suppose to grow ones soul then this really is some faint version of hell. Sounds pretty stupid to me.

I just can’t with people…. On this topic. 

I know the political can get…. Tiresome…. Confusing. But are we just going to sit back and watch the suffering. And return to our meditative bubble?

When we take karma to a past life. We take on an identity …. A burden that may not be truly be ours. 

And while the concept karma/ past lives in its essense …. In its purest form … Was probably created to help us be mindful. We (along with this Entity(s)) take it too far. Make it confusing…. hierarchical….. Complicated….. Divisive….. Used to ones advantage…. Money making…. I can go on…. But you get it. 

Last time I’m debating this stuff.

“Robert Bruce 2 | Psychic Self Defense, Removing Entities, Angelic Guidance | EODR 37”

Kinda crazy…. Kinda interesting. 

When I was listening to this podcast they talked about “Remote Viewing” and I was bought to one of the days this all kind of sparked off December 25 2015. 

My ex (false twin flame) had send a general “happy Xmas text” and for some reason I instantly became faint and had to lay down. As I was laying down awake I had a vision of my Ex’s best friend (who apparently a healer) looking down at me and smoking weed. I had never had anything like this happen before. So I started looking it up. That’s when I found that it may be possible for someone to “remote view” you through a crystal or third eye. So I kinda freaked out bought some protection crystals and went about my life.

If someone was remote viewing me…. Why would I remote view her back? If this woman is a healer why would this situation decline to such a derogatory state? If both my Ex and his best friend did anything why would they even reveal themselves to me or let me know they are doing it? If you are trying to rock someone world remotely I would only assume you would want to keep it a secret. 

This Entity needed people and a story to hide behind. And unfortunately this is probably how people loose their ever loving minds and flip out and hurt people. Fortunately I’ve maintained my cool…… Considering.

There was also a part of the podcast that talked about generation/DNA Entity attachments. Which I have also tested this theory. I was completely honest with my parents about what I was hearing and neither my mother or father ever experienced it. I think my mom might have had an altered state once when she was reading the bible. But nothing like THIS. Also the Entity knows very little about my family members and any information is from my own knowing. Also memories from my childhood are piecemealed and distorted. So say for instance I remember the feeling of the day I woke up early in the morning to go play in the fog because it felt magical…. The entity shows the image of me from an outside perspective so I was seeing myself… I remember seeing my feet on the concrete trying to run over to the grassy area. The rest of any details were made up to make it seem like it had been there this whole time. Which it has not.

So nope….. No twin flame vengeance, No generational curse, Def no past life bullshit….. And I have NO idea what would warrent this as Karma…… So what is it?

Plain old evil…. Using whatever lie to get you believe its real and the more you believe its real the more “power” it has…. And can position itself in control. And ultimately take your precious life? Or worse someone else’s?

It saddens me if it is this kind of tourment that drives people to hurt their own kids or loved ones. Believing they are demonic…. Or whatever else sick craziness that an Entity can come up with to trick/ force someone into doing something horrific.

I have to figure out how to get rid of this thing. As I’ve said before there are plenty of people who willing play with Entities so I don’t understand why its staying here.