Narcolepsy: Church

So was watching my church online like I do every Sunday (or Monday depending).

And all of a sudden the Entities knocked me out. Now the Entity woke me up at 3am and then at 12pm knocked me out mid sermon.

The Entities kept calling my pastor gay. Which I wouldn’t care if he was, but he’s not. And the Entities were trying to twist the word and Say Jesus worship is Satan worship. Which is another thing running around in the New Age/ Occult arena.

So it took me a while to figure out WHY these Entities were pushing me into Christianity in the beginning. In the beginning I believed in God above all things and Jesus as a teacher sent by God to teach us how to be better humans. However that is what the commandments are for. I did not believe that Jesus was ONLY PATH (new agey) and that he was God embodied to die for our sins, not so we can sin, but so we can be redeemed.

So I was an easy target for my ignorance.

The reason that these entities played God was so they could then disprove or then make it seem that there was no God or to make me lose faith in the feeling of abandonment as they torture me for the last 4 years.

It’s a simple bait and switch. My “spiritual journey” was at its essence trying to become closer to God and understand truth in this world of lies. And then my weird supernatural experience (caused by Entities /Demons) crossed with the crazy new age stuff I found online (which people think is spiritual) totally knocked me off my feet. And things got really confusing.

These demons are really out here trying to lure people further and further from God. To the point they are pretending to be God.

They will say they are the Voice of God or Jesus and then rape you energetically, torture you, take over your mind to the point you don’t know what is what, show you illusions so you keep running after something that essentially does not exist, because we want proof of something beyond us. Then make you feel as if God abandoned you and try to convince you there is no God.

And I’m like OK so the Demonic Entities that are TALKING TO ME, are trying to convince ME there is NO GOD. Lol how much sense does that make?

I mean the first fuck up was that they made was revealed themselves to me all. That was number one. And then THEY, these astral matrix-y demonic (acting) entities, are going to try to convince ME something doesn’t exist when in fact their mere existence was unfathomable in the first place?

It’s easy to get stuck in our immediate situation with these demonic entities. To think that is all there is. To constantly try to figure it out and blame it on new agey past life’s, karma, twin flames, not having our occult astral shields up, not doing enough witchy baths, government following you cause you went to a protest, not being of love and light…. some bs. Yea NO. And it’s easy to get into these concepts, when trying to figure out WHY AM I BEING ATTACK?!

I will be honest with you ANYONE can be attack. Sinner, the righteous, Good, bad and in between. What only truly furthers our attacks is IGNORANCE.

The lack of truth. Some of which we may never figure out and need to come to peace with that. We aren’t meant to know all the secrets of the universe lol because then that would make us God. And we are not God or Gods as much as we would like ourselves to be.

So be at peace with not knowing everything. Enough was revealed to us to know what these things are and that they attack who ever. Even Jesus in the desert for 40 days, and he is Holy!! That is how bold these demons are, they attacked the son of God, in hopes he would weaken.

So why not us?

Or a lot of us…… not all.

So know this. All of these theories. While they can help in the absence of faith to have something to cling to…… they can be VERY detrimental in the fact they can be skewed, twisted, ever evolving to get us to the point there is no God. The word of God is unmoving (well for the most part, minus slavery and stuff, BUT it says in the Bible that it must not be altered and those who did so at any point in time will face severe consequences).

You know what’s funny, is that I actually think a lot of the technologies that Target Individuals talk about exist in some fashion. I guess my point is that more likely they are NOT using it on you. Bob next door does not have DARPA weapons aimed at you and follow you everywhere you go.

But the devil knows how to get you worked up enough to think so. If you cant see through the lies then we are definitely doomed.

Man all I wanted to do is watch a sermon this morning. And I’m out here on my internet soap box.

False Teachings: Kundalini, False “Awakenings”, Ascension… The New Age 🙄

So this was a comment on a video I was watching. I can attest to the false and misleading teachings.

Again I slipped into New Age trying to find God for me. And trying to figure out why I was having “supernatural” experiences, And just found some wacky stuff. But at the heart of it there was some…… idk truth to the matter but it is only meant to suck you in even deeper.

So while I might not see the “serpent going up my back” I have seen snakes in the “astral” and I have seen these other things placed over the forehead that represents the 3rd eye.

One time I was walking down the street, neck deep in the thick of this experience. And a old school (but young) psychic woman stopped me on the street. She said she had something to tell me. And I went to her apartment. She said I had a “tear in my aura”, 🤯🙄🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ (okie dokie) she pulled some cards and asked me what do I think the blindfold represents. For some reason I said protection (and I know how to read tarot unfortunately). In that moment the blindfold for me meant protection and keeping us from seeing certain things.

I don’t know if God removed “the veils” from my eyes, but the way the Entities try to cover them is COMPLETELY different than the way I have lived my life over the last 30 summin years. Like I can actually see a black patch in front of my eyes. It’s subtle enough to not completely ruin my physical vision. But still there. This black patch (or attachment) creates visions illusions dreams. And when they remove them when they feel like it, I can see them (be it real astral or an illusion) something is there and or something put something there. So this aspect developed in 2017 a year after hearing the voices. Seeing the entities would scare anyone. Seeing Troll/Demon/ Reptilian, Alien heads Floating around, Praying Mantis, it’s uhhhh not fun. I mean some may think it’s fun but it gets old real quick. Especially once you realize you don’t really have much control over the experience.

I wasn’t even deep into yoga. Just went to two classes with my coworkers to have a “healthy lifestyle”. I’m not gonna lie I enjoyed the strengthening aspect of yoga and stretching areas that normally would not get attention. But honestly in my process of elimination I have no problem letting that go as well.

Like as much as people want to deny it SOMETHING IS UP and A LOT of people are feeling it one way or another.

I mean to me the 3rd Eye is a light receptor. That is my take. Super Natural or not, I don’t think anyone would see the “supernatural realms” if these entities were not in VERY close proximity. Like I saw sparkles when I was younger but that is an attack from a further range by an entity. But if the entity is close by (at least for me personally), you might see black shadows, actual entities, get pain in the body.

Entities as I keep reiterating in this blog , from my observations, are made up of light, light can apparently have consciousness and through their own consciousness they can create illusions with the light that they are. That is the best way I can describe it.

Some want to play with these realms and do you boo, but not me. At best I want to release myself. And that’s been my goal ever since this stuff started.

But it has been interesting putting together some of these concepts together. At least I have SOME understanding of my spiritual oppression.

Entities in the Children’s ER

So I’m with my Godson at the children’s ER because he might have the flu that has been going around.

He was sleeping and I was on my phone bullshitting and maybe an hour into the situation I felt something release from my booty (I have been feeling this weird booty energy release for a while now, pause, it’s not a fart, I have also felt this same release on my upper back/shoulder and it’s been on my right side. So a lot of pain and pressure on the left a lot of releasing on the right). So this happened and I forgot OH YEA IM DEMONICALLY OPPRESSED!

So I scanned the room to see what was up and there were the energy fields of entities on his bed and the empty baby bed in the room.

Once it saw that I saw it it shot into my right eye. But I could still see the energy mass sparkling and floating around at the foot of the bed.

Now while my godson was in the cab to the hospital he was complaining about a headache, like a really bad headache and he had a fever. And for me when the entities connect to my head i can normally get fevers and migraines. Not always together but most of the time. Like right now I have a migraine no fever. But often I do.

So I scanned his skull region to see if there was anything, and I surprisingly I did not see anything. This was prior to going inside the hospital.

So there is nothing attached to his body directly to his upper body. But there seems do be something attached to his lower legs.

Then there are other entities attached to the foot of the bed that were going wild that I saw them. My bed has entities all around them. If you think about it a bed is when we are the most vulnerable so it would make sense that that is their top favorite place. (Bathroom is probably second in my guess, cars 3rd)

So it’s saddens me SO DEEPLY that even innocent children are fair game for these Entities. But if you think about it that is how they indoctrinate us into their sick games. From a young age. We just don’t know it.

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

BIG DEEP BREATHS!

Trying not cry about how fucking gross this planet is. 🥺😭🤢🤮

Ascension Symptoms: Flu (New Age lies lol)

So I’m am under the weather. BUT honestly I have been not feeling well this whole time since my attack began in 2016. I’m starting to forget how it feels to feel ….. ok.

I remember one of the New Age lies that was circling around the internet (Facebook) was “ascension flu“. That because you are physically ill you are “shifting energies” some go as far to think they are martyrs for the collective.

This I believe is dangerous misinformation.

“Energy” are Entities. It’s just coded. Energies or Entities are made up of light and are conscious to various degrees. Even “negative energies/entities” are still made up of light. As much as we want to call them dark or because we saw shadow figures….. they all use light!

I have yet to encounter a “good energy/entity” because at the heart of it there is a lie. Be it their actual name, appearance or information they are sharing with an individual.

This is what is dangerous. Even in the most innocent circumstances.

Because these “energy/entities” lie. We are giving them full access to our bodies and minds and calling it “ascension symptoms”. They do not deserve such privilege. And instead of battling them we are playing with them as they deteriorate our spiritual energy and essentially our body which will manifest as “ascension symptom flu” or even worse.

Since I can personally see what most would call energy, but are in fact entities, conscious beings with a face and everything, I can see that most of us are swimming in them. They are everywhere. One little trick I learned from the Targeted Individual community was EMF readers on the phone. So electromagnetic field readers. Most Targeted Individuals who are getting attacked hard physically by what I would say is Entities, but most believe is government satellites to some varying degree, also give off strong EMF readings. Some in the 200s. And that’s usually insane amounts of pain. The body is not suppose to endure more than 50 regularly and even then that’s high.

So since I can see them I would take my EMF reader and test it. And behold usually the spot where I could see them the reading was high. 200+. I was at a park watching my godson and I saw a string of water space “energy/entities” attached to the park bench. So I pulled out my reader and the reading was off the charts. But when I went to an area I didn’t see them or another par of the bench it was not.

So the the point is that these “energies” which are essentially entities (conscious beings), that are made of light, emit their own electromagnetic field (which is not usually that big, but still). That energy/entity effects our body and whatever that entity feels like playing for the day effects our mind. And I stronger feel like their presence in our body breaks down the immune system making us more susceptible to earthly diseases.

These are not toys to be played with.

While I would love to say rebuking them in the name of Jesus has worked for me. I can only say that recognizing the BS has been more helpful. And God gave me the strength and discernment to do so.

Now I am not trying to come down on people for believing whatever. I mean I thought a “Spirit” was my grandpa when I was younger. And who doesn’t want to feel connected to their family members who passed. And I even wondered about aliens and all that stuff. If God made me he could make aliens too no? Most of us wanted or naturally had supernatural experiences. And wanted answers. But it is time to wake up!

These entities are NOT your friend! And if they are acting like it you are paying a price you have no idea about.

By even allow these entities to play, God, Angels, Demons, Starseed Aliens, higher self, twin flame (higher self), relatives that have passed on, gods or goddesses, past life, ANY OF THAT! If we give them the room to play with our Consciousness they will eventually play with our bodies and ultimately our lives, deviating us from our relationship with God , our purpose, and soul of who we are.

You are not here to play these games!!!

I woke up one day recently and I felt this dull brown, quiet and very SAD energy. And I thought I would shake it off at some point but it wasn’t going anywhere and I wasn’t connecting with it as mine for some reason. I was blessed enough to have a great holiday and got to see the people I love and was content. So I actually messaged my friend who is a healer and asked if she had done any work on me, and before she answered back I felt the “energy” leave my body. I told her ops never mind! And she said no she had not done anything.

Now one do you know how much work these entities are doing to just ruin my day? To hold that feeling of sadness for that long to convince me I should be sad is INSANITY. Which is another point.

Y’all playing with shit you can not see. These Entities that you deem as formless energies from the moon cycle or planets aligning, NO BOO BOO, these are whole ecosystems of the “astral” or ethers that they work in. It is in our world operating on its on and with us. And yes you can manipulate or work with this ecosystem which would be called black magic or white magic (light workers).

I am not with it. FUCK ASTRAL WORLD!

Again by playing with these entities we are giving them full access to US.

Ask yourself a question: why do they want to interact with us so badly? So bad they will lie based on your belief system to gain authority.

Y’all really think they are trying to help the planetary evolution? Look at the state of the world! I would strongly disagree. And if you let these entities drive you around and not snap the fuck out of this none sense we ARE DOOMED! You are not ascending anywhere, you are playing games with God know what kind of entity that is harming your body.

That is the real awakening!

Stop playing games with these fucking assholes!

Observations: Eyes Taken in the Astral

An observation that I have noticed is that many times I have had my “eyes taken”.

Often is feels like my eyes will go blurry and then a series of “visions” will come to mind.

For me this is something that the Entities/demons do. They do this especially to twist ideas and distract you or suggest you.

When this first started the Entities kept saying “my eyes are your eyes” and pretended to be someone and something other than the pathetic POS that they are. And then another one would scream “I hope she never has eyes!” They are absolutely insane and I can’t believe is my real life….. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s much like when they create dreams. From what I saw in the “astral” if we want to call it that is that they place “black patches” attachments to the eyes and this causes you not to see the actual entities as well. However it also allows them to have control and through these “black energy patches”, for lack of a better word, they also feed visions to us/ me.

When you are working on your “third eye” and focusing on the center of your skull what you are actually doing is blinding yourself to submitting yourself to visions. This visions are created by Entities with etheric light energy. They ARE the light, they use the light to create an illusion. And by you not focusing on what is actually happening in front of your eyes you have submitted to an illusion. If you had a vision and then focused your eyes to what’s going on right in front of you you would see a COMPLETELY different world. It’s not all pretty. It is barren, and full of illusionist trying to get their rocks off.

They are liars. And they assault the mind, body and spirit.

I can’t tell you HOW many people both schiz and not, man or woman, have been sexually assaulted “spiritually” if we want to call it that. I would say Etherically.

Maybe most of them have not had theirs go on for as long as mine. But it has happened there is literally a METOO movement happening in the Ethers.

I know that my opinion will be an unpopular opinion but honestly you are not “activating your third eye” you are blurring your vision with your eyes closed and allowing entities to lie to you RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE!!!! In your eyes! Like they can be big or tiny tiny. And yes we have a pineal gland and maybe that has to do with light receptivity. But either way these Entities are full of 💩💩💩💩💩.

I have mentioned in this blog so many times that on MANY occasions I have looked past the illusion (or one of them). On one occasion I saw the image of a woman in my ” third eye” and something told me to look straight ahead and what I saw the woman then began a praying mantis. And soon as the praying mantis saw that I saw it, it jetted out of my field.

Why you scared?

How does the mantis know I am looking at it straight ahead?

Why are they lying to us?

So many questions!

But honestly I do t even want to write about this stuff anymore. But I feel the need to document it for anyone out there or for the next wave of people. Because the deception is REAL and we are looking like FUCKING IDIOTS!

What I am currently trying to do is strengthen my understanding and relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I know I am a sinner. And I can’t not get out of this hell matrix with out Jesus!

The New Age really got me! And I was lead there by the demons that hung around me, I would experience something “super natural” and google it and then some new age site had an explanation. But NO real solution other than “a bright white light around you” 🙄 So you say that the dark is attracted to my light, but then you tell me to rev up my light to repel them? OKie Dokie!! That makes sense! 🤪

Either way, these demons will lead you astray in what ever form! And you will end up in some occult bs with out even knowing. You were groomed since sin, by demons to end up where you are. Where I am sorry. And yet I still have to be accountable for my nativity.

So slowly they will give you these “super natural” experiences ……. grooming you. Making sure your belief is just right. That you are far enough from God to attack! And they will devour. And if your are lucky you will be saved. I have yet to be so lucky. And I am not sure why. But it is something I have to accept in the moment.

These demons what ALL of you. Touching your hands, genitals, I had one kiss me, 🤢 not to mention rape. Like I’m not making this shit up and it’s NOT my mind. I mean there is YouTube video after YouTube video of people saying they have had these experiences. And they DO NOT consider themselves schizophrenics.

Awakening is bullshit, Third eye bullshit, even the “astral” as normally explained …. bullshit, ascension to whatever dimension is bullshit. It is a lie, lie if people who have been lied to and spreading their lie and thinking they are a Guru because they had a DMT trip. Like this is soooo dangerous.

One dude on YouTube was talking about how he has sex in the astral! LOL are you that hard up bro? That you are fucking with astral spiders that are an illusion of some fantasy woman? Get your WHOLE life together! And he thinks he is a Guru of “astral travel”!

Astral travel is bullshit! You are just being given a waking dream by entities. Are being sucked into their ecosystem which is their being which comprised of smaller beings that all make up the worlds in which you think you are traveling in.

They make you feel by attaching to you. I once felt like I was being jerked around in a dream and as I woke up for like maybe 20 mins I still had 2 things attached to my back that were still buzzing. And I literally felt the suction of them releasing from my body.

I’m not going to say I know everything cause I don’t. But I did my research and I surveyed A LOT of people and this shit is BUUUUILLLLL💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩!

And we are gladly handing over our soul for apparent ” live and light” and our mission to save Earth! You wanna save earth? You want to “awaken” WAKE UP! Look right in front of you!!! Right in front of you! You are being lied to! But if you want to keep the illusion FINE!!

Shit is scary!! But you don’t want to save the Earth! You want to play fantasy game of “I’m an angel” or “I’m an alien” or ” I was Isis in a past life” simulation game by these matrix entities that is DEMONS! Old fashion ass DEMONS!

WAKE UP! For real this time!!!

Targeted Individual: Meditative State

I spent about 2 years+ so far in a meditative state.

This was me training myself. I did not have a guru. Youtube videos were not doing it for me. It was an organic way of just being aware of my what was happening. An observation of the things that were happening to me that i could not control.

I was being shown strong visions i could not control, my body was vibrating and convulsing, emotions i could not control and often did not connect with. I see aliens and demons floating around, orbs, sparkles. Hearing the most vile things while they try to convince me that some of these vile thoughts are my own.

It took observation and a slowling down to understand what was me and what was not me.

So an example would be i would in my room and i would hear my dad go into to living room. The voices/demon aliens would then show me a vision of a penis ( i have no idea if it is my fathers cause i aint see it and i aint trying to) and then say i want to have sex with my father. Now the awareness of my father being there, that is natural and me. Everything else is NOT. And it use to upset me to the point i would cry because i just could not understand why out of no where one day i am having these incestuous thoughts. But I had to realize they are not mine.

Even one day i my dad and i had dinner together (first time ever) when i went to visit him on the beach and i was admiring his big bright blue eyes and of course the demons aliens turned it gross and raped me there at the table (to make it seem like i was turned on) saying i was attracted to my father. When i was simply cherishing him.

Any attempt at building a loving positive thought was/is ruined. And normally that is who i am. I am the kind of person to tell a random stranger how much i love their outfit. (See update below) Lol at least i use to be.

So all attempts are to keep me from loving positive truthful thoughts. They have even recently twisted my thoughts trying to say i am attracted to my best friends boyfriend, and that is the “play they want”. But im not and i think he is great for her. But because i have a positive thoughts around him (for her)…… It has to turn sexual yet again with these alien demons voices. It cant just be that i think he he is great for her …. It has be taken to another level.

Its always taking it to another level. There is no simplicity with these demon alien voices.

They do the same thing with pedo thoughts as well. I love my godson and might appreciate how silly he is being and they just ruin it with a pedo thought. And I’m stuck there with a frown on my face.

So I noticed FOR ME that a lot of this is centeres around men/boys and my love and or appreciation of them and that being either turned sexual or sour. So with the men i ACTUALLY DATED lol the voices didnt like them and would give negative thought like they are cheating on me or think i am ugly ect ect. But for the men in my life who i appreciated and nothing would ever be sexual they turned sexual in my mind.

Again this is something i spoke about in my blog before. THE OPPOSITE. The alien demon voices constantly trying to convince me of the opposite of what something actually is.

They have done so much sexual vile disgusting thoughts so much and i have had less than supportive dating partners that i give up and i am Asexual at this point. I am overwelmed. Lol and its enough work sorting through the bullshit.

But part of the meditative state is finally getting to the point where you dont have to sort anymore. You just know its bullshit. You allow it to roll by. Its still NOT the life i want to live. But its better than giving it as much energy as i did before and crying into my plate everyday cause i just cant cope.

Much of meditation that i have notices is either creating a space like visualizing yourself at a lake …… Or nothingness. And unfortunately i cant do either. It is very difficult for me to create a whole space now like i use to. The alien demons have enough control of my consciousness to effect that or make it exhausting to execute.

And nothingness is impossible because when i close my eyes i see flashing white lights, “energy” lights flowing, other light beings/ entities, sparkles ect. Nothingness is impossible right now because my energy field is not clear. So alot of my meditative state was going from fear to curiosity (drawing and describing them), to just being ok with them there and letting it roll by …… For now. Again not being excited by the situation.

And sometimes they will give a false sense of fear or being scared. Its like an electric shock to the head or body…… Or false sense of anxiety as they get close to my body. But im like DUDES i see y’all all day every day for 3.5 years, you’ve shown me the most vile things one could see and cried till i cant no more…… I know for a fact that the emotions or anxiety that they where trying to get out of me was false feelings. …… Im not sure HOW they do all that they do….. But im sure they had eons to figure it out.

This is not to say i dont have any emotions at all. I recently became emotional about the child that committed suicide because ICE took her father. And it just killed me. I thought about her emotional state. I thought about how spiritually these entities may have got to her……. How the state (ICE) effected her. Just really upsets me when they get our children and elders. Just the state of the world in general is overwelming. And i allow myself to feel for that for a moment.

But i have this situation at hand to focus on.

And staying on top of that. And staying as “zen” as possible and not letting these alien demons take anymore from my life than they already have.

update: lol on my instagram this photo just showed up which I thought was funny since I just mentioned it here.

Twin Flame: Astral Sex

Someone came to my blog by seaching for “astral sex with twin flame” i guess i wanted to make it clear as someone who can see, feel and hear the astral. As someone who has been through the “twin flame game”, anything you mess with in the astral is NOT your twin flame. They are entities. A large entity made up if smaller entity of the groteque manner. They can use light in the imagination/dream state to make you THINK it’s a specific person, they can mimick voices, they can even tell the future by influencing it. But they are not that person. It is an entity, a nice broader word for alien or demon. At best they maybe attachedto your twin flame or just became attached to you if you were looking for your twin flame to harvest sexual energy from you.

You give them an inch and they will take over your life!

They would force me to orgasm as i would wake up making me think my ex (so called twin flame) was try to please me. It felt real. It felt like he was holding my hand sometimes. He wasnt. It is not him or his higher self. It is complete entity play. It is rape (if they are impostering a human twin flame).

I don’t want to incite fear into anyone. And belueve me i would rather have the daydream. But i feel it is my duty to let people know at least my truth…… Because eventually the entities were trying to make me so depressed about my twin flame they were trying to force me into suicide saying we would be together my next life time. Yes! These entities impersonated my ex saying we will be together next life time and i should kill myself!

Only reason i ever attempted was because once i stopped believing the twin flame thing the entities stopped impostering my ex and then started showing me sick visions of child abuse and i wanted to die.

Whatever these entities are at the end of the day they are gross liars. So dont fall for the tricks.

Can you be pimped in the astral plane?

I mean is that even a thing?

This is the second time (or period of time) this nasty ass evil ass piece of shit demon alien THING tried to pimp me on the astra to some heavy ass beast energy. Like i dont even know what they are doing exactly cause i can only hear and see in part.

But i know there was some talks of money. They got currency in the astral? And then some SUPER heavy energy layed on top of me as much as i fought and said no and cussed them out. And then the heavy entity sighed relief after being connected to me or something. (And the wierd cats visions) …… And im just over here trying to figure out what is happening to me.

Like are they just playing with me?

Is my energy or body really being pimped out by some asshole demon for astral currancy?

I mean can you even do that? Is it even like legal in the grand laws?

It sounds ridiculous right? And yet my friend said his twin flame in italy something similar was happening to her. But their story was all over the place.

I’m just by my lonesome trying to figure this out.

I just dont see how this is possible or legal or like not stopable at this point.

I just wanted to make this note in case anyone else was dealing with this in any shape or form.

I never tried to play in the astral/ dimension or anything like that……it just happened. But from what i read most are suppose to leave you alone …. Thats what im not understanding. Is why they wont leave me alone.

Is this really my life? (Last night)

Im just complaining again.

I just see all my friend making moves having kids and wedding and successful careers and relationships and babies and going back to school just i am sitting here being pimped and raped and molested on the astral realm in the most vile ways ……….. alone.

The voice had the nerve to say oh i can go do something with my life. Well i was doing something with my life and it decided to show my vile images of child abuse forcing me to quit my job. And i am already waiting on disability. Because between the migraines, my body vibrating, my vagina being burned, the physical heavy energy of these entities amd seeing, hearing them non stop and feeling them I just dont know what the point of trying to take on any major responsibility if they will just attack me when they feel like making a bet of my life.

I tried to take on babysitting my Goodson once a week and that honestly wipes me out for two days after. And thats pretty easy stvleast easy compared to all of what i use to do.

I just hate this. And i am just trying to go through the process with some hope but after nights like last night…….. I dont know. I dont even know what the point of having a body is….. But then i remember others dont go through this level of intensity. Indont even want my body any more. Its just being used for vile things and thoughts and beings.

Last night i felt a very heavy very large entity trying to sitting on top of me. My groin area as usual. I didnt try to look at them closely like i normally do cause then they electro shock my system to simulate fear but if i was scared i wpuldnt have looked in the first place and they look like dumb cartoons ANYWAYS. But i didnt feel like being electro shocked in my system. And i told them to get off of me they are tresspassing. They are not welcomed. Get the fuck out of my friends house. I threatened to take a photo of the entity with my “longExpo” app on iphone that takes good photos of them, even though i really didnt want to do all of that. And it went away for a while and i tried to sleep again. Then i was awakened and i heard the main voice i always hear talk about money (like he use to with other entities at my house last year) and i tried to fight off the new entity and just knew at some point it was pointless. And it vibrated my body (some how weird visions of cats came into the mix) and the new entity made this wierd gross sigh of relief making me feel so gross and used last night. And other voice said something like you scared her (with the sigh).

Like not only do i have to be used by dudes in 3D i have to be used by these invisible entities in 4D. And i hate having a body now. I hate it, its pointless. It’s not mine to have. I dont want to be here anymore. I wish there was another planet i could jump to but i cant…. Probably doesnt even exist. No wonder everyone hoping for aliens to come down and take them mean while im not sure if they are the ones raping me so i am screwed either way.

And a friend told me this is “the highest honor” we can do for our people and stuff and im not seeing how being raped and used and literally like pimped on the astral is helping that. And like im gonna be a old betty talking this non sense in a senior home is that really the life i got to loom forward to? I worked so fucking hard to get out of homelessness and just be there for others when i didnt have much ….. And just do my best and work hard. And really? This is what life’s got to give me? Entity rape guised as schizophrenia?

Because everyone believe a good ghost story until its your best friend getting raped in another dimension.

Just OVER IT! I thought i was making some headway to be honest and last night was a reminder that they are waiting to pounce me at any given moment. Im fair game for some reason. EVERYONE ELSE is protected by the blood of jesus but my ass.

I really really really fucking hate my life right now.

I want my body back!

I want my body, mind, soul, spirit back NOW!

I am waiting to see if i can get some cash flow so i can start eating better and organic again. I dont care what any omnivore says….. My body can not process meat the way others can. May on occasion or festivities….. But an every day basis of my diet. Nope. I gained soooooooo much weight.

When i went raw i lost 20lb in a month but thats too much in a month. And i dont want flab. Its difficult to cook in my parents house cause my mom is always in the kitchen and the refrigerator is always full with left overs.

I am slightly afraid that my vegetarian/vegan lifestyle had something to do with what seemed like my spontaneous awakening. But i have to do what i know is right for my body.

I’ve mapped my mental landscape and the games the demonic aliens play. But i want to get rid of them desperately.

At night in my dreams they take control of my spirit/consciousness and drive it through dreams. I cant say exactly how but its like they wear my spirit and drive it while im asleep creating an illusion dreamscape to play in. Which is 100 times better than their sad reality of floating around in space waiting to fuck with someone believe me.

I miss running….. Sweating…. Biking…. I had lost 130+lb over a couple of years and was about 40lb away from my goal weight when i got attacked by the demon aliens. And i slowly became inactive becauce the weight of them hurt to simply walk to breathe. I felt like i was being choked, like my brain was in a vice. So i stopped all activity. Then tgey forced me to quit my job by the sick images they were showing me and saying to me. Then i became depressed and pretty much only ate cheese sandwhiches and cookies all day for like a year. It was a sad look. All my vital came back ok. My blood pressure was a bit high but nothing my doctors seem to take as seriously as i was.

Even being unhealthy i still see hear and feel them. My body is no longer in an alkaline state (i was lighly following Dr. Sebi Akaline guidelines but not strictly). Prior i was 7+ph.

I almost want to cut off all my hair again. Idk. My hsir is just sitti g on my head in a bun all day. Wasting shampoo AND tons of conditioner on it.

Im like wasti g to go into warrior mode ….. Just been waiting and waiting. So tired of waiting. Waiting for money, answers, healing, something!

The soul and the spirit i believe is different i believe. I believe the soul is the observer the spirit is the driver. What animates us. The electricity that runs through our body. Unfortunately this can be hacked. I dont think our soul can be hacked maybe im wrong. The soul is pure. But the body is a bio computer. It is a reciever of information. And it is being hacked and viruses and back doors and Trojans and identify theft is being carried out by these demon aliens. I mean they sounded just like my ex (identy theft). They knew what song he was goung to send me 2 weeks before he sent it (back door).

But i havent fleshed this out too much. But i dont know why they do what they do but its wrong and bad andcevil and there will soon be a reckoning for them and who ever is working with them.