Running out of options

I’ve done the shaman, light worker, meditation, prayer thing….

I’ve the targeted individual, Mk ultra, gang stalking….. Matrix’s of insectoid thing….

Committing suicide for a twin flame thing….

Loosing everything like the “Book of Jobe” thing. 

Girl interrupted shave my head psyche ward crayon thing…. 

Clearing trapped energetic emotions for humanity thing….. Angel and demons thing. 

😩

I wanna do that thing where this all stops and I can enjoy this brief existence sans being raped every night by an reptilian insectoid posing as my ex twin flame. 

When will I get that this is done thing …. Finished thing? They go away thing? Never come back again thing? 

Advertisements

Spelling Bee 🐝🐝

This has happened a many times now. At first I called this “word salad” basically feeling like the Entities purposefully spelled or said words wrong and disorganizing thoughts before me to through me off and drive me crazy. 

GRANTED! My spelling and grammar is pretty bad. But again I know how its bad. 

So an example that came up just now. I was looking up “milkweeds” because I saw a short film on not drinking cows milk and then wondered what other plant based milks we could use other than almond. So milkweed came up. But its totally toxic. 

ANYWAYS! 

So the word “swamp” was in the description and the Demonic Entity said, “swAMP” and I said you mean…. “SwAHMP“?

It was like this entity never heard or read the word before. But maybe they are fucking with me. 

Numb 👤 Etheric Overlays

So …. I have noticed for a while now a numb sensation. 

At first I thought it was because I wasn’t moving as much. But YOU KNOW ME overly aware all the time.

So I noticed my hands going numb (especially around the phone). And when I looked there were one of those circles there. Noticed my thighs for months now. 

I noticed my feet/ ankle going numb. And then I felt that energy move up my leg that’s what prompted me to write about it.

Ive seen foreign energy move under my skin and then leave a mark. Either a pictogram (or emoji like) or an X. 

It’s so gross seeing your skin move. Its not like an aliens gonna pop out…. Its like a wave. Its more meshed WITH the skin than under it. 

That’s how the burn me, and talk to me, and poke, vibrate …. Rape. “Punch”…… Is by merging with the human cell or the space in between cells and causing an illusionary sensation.

Hands, arms, feet, thighs. And then my core and head is a whole other thing with etheric animals and beings coming and going as they please. Just …. Uhg. And my 3rd eye is pretty much a big gaping hole at this point. 

And they won’t stop, won’t shut up, won’t leave, won’t provide any “contracts”.

—————– 

The Demonic Archon Alien tried to say its prepping my body for the Isis etheric overlay. 😩😞😒

Suck an etheric dick. 

I said NO! 

Teenage Angst ✌

So I totally don’t want to talk to my family after them throwing schiz in my face to emotionally manipulate each other. 

And I don’t want to talk to this fucking demon…..

And idk who the fuck my friends are cause it all was based on what I could do for them. Crash at my place, money, food, sex, jobs, ect. 

So…….. Fuck this?

I’m in my 30s sitting here with demon possesed teenage angst in my parents house when I thought I would boo’ed up in my own apartment 100lb lighter working on an organic farm.

Shit is so lame. 

Exploitation of Pain (The Healer on TLC) 👐

These beings exploit pain! 

ANY! Emotional, mental, physical, ethric, environmental! 

I was watching “The healer” and demon tried to insinuate that this guy was putting evil energy in the people he works with.

But honestly what I felt was he was removing the exploitation of pain out attachments out. I can see the pain attachments. That is my assumption. The healers light or energy is moving it OUT not in. I wonder what he sees. 

I had a toothache one time….. And a few times I would say the words love and the tootheache would go away for a little bit. But ever since this evil energy has attached to me…… I had a toothache and it was pumping that area full of painful energy to a level that is not OK for a human. 

So I know these entities exploit pain anyway they can. Sad about your grandma who passed… Exploit…  Back hurts a little bit…… let’s make it crippling, childhood traumas…… LETS HIT THAT NOTE FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. . 

Seriously fuck these demons. 

Anger Management 😡

I have reason for my issues. But I’m almost at the same place I was with my ex twin flame. 

Angry. Angry that my needs weren’t being meet.

Like with my ex it was just super heighten emotions so it felt beyond me…. 

This is….. With in grasps considering I’m being raped by an demonic alien pedophile while having o take care of my twin sister while she lacks appreciation for everything I do and I am compromising my whole being. 

I don’t want to be fake, but I don’t want be angry either. 

I guess cause I’ve asked them so many times. Idk. I don’t wanna act like that again. 

Family Ties 🍃👭👫🍃

So my sister had an appointment my mom asked me to go with her to. I told my mom a few days ago I would go no problem.

Me minding my own business laying on my bed looking at Facebook. 

My sister: How are you feeling?

Me: Terrible as always. (Which is something I say all the time cause I’m not gonna lie and say everything is fine when its not. When things are actually fine I have no problem updating.)

Sister: Well you don’t have to go, if you know that’s too much for you ect. 

Me: You are RUDE! 

I felt like my sister is NOW using my schizo to try to gain her independence. Which is RUDE! My mom did the same thing thanksgiving. Asked me for DAYS about going to get a TV for her, and the hour before going she says, 

My Mom: Oh you don’t have to go I know crowds are too much for you.

Me: oh now I’m too crazy to go? (Sarcastically)

Mom: I didn’t say that.

Me: I guess you gonna take your husband. Y’all choose each other. 

Dad: “I’m not gonna let my fucking daughter humiliate me into telling what to do. And your mother never called you crazy. 

Me: Perfect example of why people shouldn’t drink (3 pints of Bloody Mary).

So, if my mom wanted my dad to go then don’t step on my back and use my mental illness to get what you want. Same thing with my sister, if my sister wanted to go by herself then fine, dont try to pin this on me and use my mental illness as an excuse. If I didn’t WANT to go to would say NO. It’s pretty simple. My sister doesn’t even notice she has done this before with her other appointments, because she wanted to test herself and go by herself. Just like she started work not being fully healed. 

I told my sister she is a pawn. Cause its like I wasn’t sad, I wasn’t crying, I was totally chillin and you go and fuck up my day because you didn’t want to upset me by me going with you to your appointment. But now I’m upset. 

No one cares when I asked to turn the TVs down….. Or not to stress me out. Or a day off. 

I’m not taking anyone’s shit. They can’t 1. Make decisions for me. Otherwise don’t ask me to do shit. If I tell you I’m gonna do it, then I made a decision. Otherwise dont ask me and make the decision for me, and pick and choose what you want me to do.

Last night I went to the store, cooked baked chicken, purple potatoes, and asparagus with lemon butter sauce for my family. Which is MAJOR! One cause they actually ate my cooking and two cause I pushed myself. 

So now I can’t go outside all of a sudden? I know myself way too well. 

I’m not taking anyone shit anymore. Family, friends, the guys out here…. This low life piece of ahit alien demon.

I don’t care what plane of existence you are in.

I was totally chillin and gotta fuck up my vibe. 

In the golden light healing meditations we cleaned our cords with family….  I instantly saw a difference in their response. Sister sent me a sweet message on FB and my mom actually let me cook. So it ONLY makes sense that these demons out here want to make them dirty with anger. 

I will have to clear my cords again. I love my family very much…… But they don’t get their implications.

Everyone telling me not to go out NOW….. But I needed that back then and a begged my sister to get a home aid…. But now … It’s just like registering 6+ months later…. 

Which I’ve already died like 800+ times….. And maybe twice actually. So now it doesnt matter…. I’m dead…. I eat dead meat cause I have no choice cause of my family and to not be rude. I am raped and abused this whole time taking care of my sister. I have astral parasitic bugs crawling through my aura and 3rd eye. I was forced to watch child porn through visions from some demonic entity for two years and died every single time. So fuck it….. I’m dead. I died more times than I think a human should.

Fuck it.

So no more bullshit.

Who is behind All of this?

I see all of these holographic 2D emoji floating images. But those are distractions they seem. 

When my friend sent me energy…. Her energy had a personality of its own. It was polite, affirming, kinda funny, non invasive. 

So I was thinking if she can send me a smiley face energy then some one else could be sending me this really nasty energy. Consciously. The drawings are pretty bad, simple, never full body, just the head. They all act the same which is invasive. But the are simply 2D holographic images that look like doodles that you make on the side of notes.

They change. Evolve. Could be something I said or read. But never consciously my style or topic. 

So who is the artist? 

Who is behind all of this? The torture? The drawings? The none stop talking?

Even for me I tend to be a bit more abstract in my art. Below is a random drawing from 2008. 

So…….. Who’s behind all of this? And why?

 

Triggering Facebook Fake News

Im all for keeping up on the lastest news and like making sure we are progressing.

but there there is like a lot of distasteful news. Like a lot of my friends are all about outing the illuminati and keep posting these fake ass news stories about katie perry, lady gaga, tom cruise, brad pit all “Outting” the Illuminati as pedophiles.

I’m sitting here like really? did you even read the article. they are formated the same way.

SHIT IS TRIGGERING AS FUCK.

Its not like anyone is helping stopping pedos with this article, its not bringing down the illuminati i dont even know who the fuck the illuminati is.

People keep circulating all this triggering ass fake news that doesnt halp anything.

Yellow Stone is going to blow up?

World Panic? Judgement Day, Nov 15th 10 days of Darkness?

Like dudes……

i know i say some triggering shit … but at least its real…. invisible but real.

i unfollowed a lot of groups spreading none-sense… but still my friends continue to spread crazy shit…. thinking its “waking the world up” but its mostly none sense.

im not saying the these illuminati or reptilian who ever the fuck is doing this arent pedos. im saying Brad Pitt didnt say they were.

endless racism, pedos, trump, deaths, people fighting…. strange sexual shit….

whatever

 

Paranoid Android 👾

I noticed there is this strange sleep pattern in my house hold. My father goes to bed around 9/10 , sister around 10-12, mom around 3am, then I’m usually woken up AT 3am up until 8am wishing I was asleep cause I have to listen to some nasty archon mofo go off about stupid shit. 

I feel like there is a stream line of family sleeping at different time. Almost like there has to be a congnative brain available at all times.

The head pressures come and go now so I’m wondering if this archon tick is just jumping from one family member to the other. I mean no one else hears it…. Or feels it to my knowledge. So I’m not sure why I can feel its presence which feels like death. 

I could be wrong.