Hearing Voices: Hearing God? 😱


So……..this is the kind of stuff that really complicates my faith in Christianity. Not so much in God ….. But Christianity.

I am baffled. A a voice hearer. As someone who hears demonic voices. Sees many alien looking demons swimming around in space…… How and when do we know it is truly the voice of God?

We know for a fact that man altered the Bible to during slavery era here in America to brainwash African slave be submissive to their “masters”.

How do we know that the bible was ever altered before for any political gains? And it just wasn’t exposed?

Apparently there are books that were taken out. I know the “book of enoch” was one. I think there were a few others. So ……. This what i mean by i dont trust men with my faith.

It is so hard to navigate this world with what is in my heart. It seems sooo simple and yet…… It is so difficult.

This dude really just said he would rape and kill his own children for God. 😳

So yea……. Like these alien demons had NO problem acting like my grandpa who passed, telpathy with my ex (accurate telepathy too), angels, aliens, goddess Isis, gang stalkers, people on tv, GOD, demons, anything really.

So…… … Im still in shock.

So how does he know it is God and not one of these demon things trying to make him carry out a hanous act? How about a life time in prison?

I’m so confused.


After some meditation on this sensational post above i realized that this person….. If a true Christian, he should know that God sacrificed is son Jesus so that 1. Our sins would be forgiven and 2. The ultimate sacrifice so no othe sacrifices were necessary.

Saying something like this is ignorant and sensational and triggering to be honest. There are other ways to express your love and faith for God other than raping and killing a thousand children. As well as to prove your point. SMH.

I just dont get peoples mode of thinking really. And I GOTTA BE THE CRAZY ONE!

Sin City 👹

In short I feel like many christians and other religions focus so much on homosexuality to the point of hatred.

But I never hear anything about child molesters. If anything they try to just group them in with the gays but no. Consent is consent. All too often child sexual abuse is looked over. And the stark reality is that is actually legal to marry a child here in the good ol’ US of A.

I actually mentioned it before but when I was a child one of the churches we went to the pastor actually raped a 14 year old and impregnate her. And the church was to forgive him because he made a mistake or whatever and God forgives and all this stuff to stick by his side and even as a child with very little awareness I was sickened. As a side note we left that church.

But I find it interesting that the church is willing to forgive pedo rapist but cast homos in to the fiery pit every other Sunday because of the one story of Sodom and Gamorah.

Another thing that always got me was hate. Where is CLEARLY SAYS love thy bro’ham, but racists people be going off the hinge. While it may not be preached in most churches I’m sure there is a culture of hatred and bigotry towards black and brown folks. Immigrants. ect. The proof is in the fundamental policies that these so called Christians passed as laws. And the history of using the Bible to enslave people.

Then on top of it we have wars that our good brothers and sisters join in on to “protect the country” by bombing other countries and killing and starving kids. “God bless America” is the slogan for war. And yet? Murder is ok? Thou shall not kill? But it’s ok when it’s a crusade or your government brainwashes you into it?

Like honestly folks be really killing me with this stuff. But homosexuality gets the brunt of it. Cause it’s easy to kill and make fun off and make the LGBT community as THE OTHER.

Like we really need to start breaking this down.

These are real things I be struggling with when it comes to religion. Not so much my faith. But the political agenda of religion.

Struggling with Faith 💔🙏💔

Everytime i get tooo Christian-y i start struggling with my faith more. It get over complicated.

Basically some one commented in my blog (a Christian i pressume) and said there are laws and if i dont follow them i basically deserve what i got.

Which is being shown child porn in my minds eye and raped/molested by demons on the hourly.

Don’t get me wrong im a sinner. But thaaaaat seems a bit extreme tbh. On top of not being able to work because of this, all possessions lost, health deteriorated, extreme physical pain, inability to hold a healthy inimate relationship and being BEYOND confused.

There is a this part in the bible where God allowed the holy spirit to leave Saul and enter David and the Saul was tormented by demons. But never said exactly why. 1 Samuel 16:14: “Now the Spirit of the Lord departed from Saul, and a harmful spirit from the Lord tormented him”. My pastor said it was because he got too big for his britches.

Im trying my best to stay humble. And not upset. I really am.

Trying to grow in Christ and learn….. And messing up and then being left to be raped by these alien demons? Like i couldn’t be just told…. Like hey you messin up in this area.

These demons sure talk all day…. So is it that impossible to talk to me instead of letting me get raped? After already being raped in the physical….. I spend 3.5 years being raped “energentically”.

Im like actually over my vagina at this point. Im so tired of thinking about and feeling it being tortured 24/7.

Im angry. Im being honest. I am hurt.

Like bad people get away with all day everyday. And like im not even bad….. Like i tried to serve humanity and do my best or better each time…. I just fuck up sometimes and i gotta get raped by demons like its a really bad joke.

I dont know what to do with this anger. This feeling of unfairness. Of abandonment.

I feel bad that i feel this way. It brings tears to my eyes that i push them away. Ive cried so much im tired of crying. I want to be simply in love with God. And now things got really complicated.


New Age vs. New World Order

I definitely fell into the New Age community because at the time they seemed to have answers for many of the strange experiences i was beginning to have. Seeing sparkles and flashes of light, dreams, “spirit” communication, visions, seeing “angel numbers” all the time 1111 to just name a few. But…… As soon as my experience took a left turn into a schizophrenic nightmare i was called crazy, dark, not of the light, negative ect by people in FB groups. And honestly those are things that me nor most of the people who know me.

I found that this was how many dealt with people in the spiritual community when someone was having a “spiritual crisis” or an entity attack if not that the basic elemantary suggestion of a salt bath and white light was prescribed to remedy the situation.

As i read on many of the posts. I found a great deal of many religious beliefs melded into one. Calling on Jesus and goddesses …. Metaphysically opening of the “third eye”….. Beliefs that the aliens were here to “help us grow and ascend” to the “new earth” or 5D as well as occult stuff.

Is was all one big tangled ball of beliefs. And while i originally come from a mindset of respecting everyones belief (with in reason), i also had a difficult time accepting Christianity as one i WAS queer and two i lost faith in the church when i was a kid when our pastor raped a 14 year old and everyone still accepted him as the pastor. Not to mention wars.

But i have come to terms. I can belueve in Jesus and God and the word and not necessarily be “Christian”. Im ok with that as apart of my current path.

A few problems i have with the New Age is the appropriation of peoples culture and beliefs with out much respect to the actual people. They use dieties and rituals and practices with out any regard to the depth of understanding thst goes behind that. Each symbol, each diety, figure, practices, food, holiday ect.

With that…. Much of the New Agers talk about “all is one, one is all” or “we are all connected” or “the veils are being lifted” …. Promoting telepathy and communication with “the other side”. Most are ok with the lie. The other side of “the veil” is fucking scary! Do you know that. Its absolutely insane and scary. But they are apart of this world. They are everywhere and NO irs not your deceased grandma Sally. Its a demon playing GAMES.

Now all these demons are connected. They have telpathic communication networks of sorts. And so the demon or some call it “a familiar spirit” that has been hanging around you or your family will tell a psychics demons all you want to hear. So you keep playing and paying.

All is one….. The melding of religions and beliefs seems soooooo….. New World Order-ish to me. One world one government one monitary system one belief.

These demons are out here melding belief systems to keep you confused. Half these people do not know what they are playing with. They THINK they are playing with angels but if they revealed their true form you would probably be shocked. And thats the lie! You really think Arch Angel Micheal is speaking to a thousand basic ass bettys on youtube? Right!

They are playing up “the event” and people think the aliens are coming down or a new earth 5d paradise will magically appear. Dudes? Really? If everyone believes this shit just enough….. When that veil actually comes down they can play whatever they want. Aliens, new messiah, ect. They will have officially dooped everyone because everyone believes in everything and we all sitting here confused as shit.

Im done with the game and lies.

You know what a 3rd eye opening is? A demon sucking on your shit feeding you useless visions, dreams, and suggestions. Mind manipulation. And you fell for it. I did too……. Of course i wanna talk to my ancestor or an angel or whatever…… But that aint them!

Just cause you got the bright side of the New Age rainbow doesnt mean your shit aint dark. It means you are naive and gullible.

Keep playing!

Spiritual Warfare: God’s Purpose For It

My friend sent me this. I’m struggling with this because according to this we are experiencing spiritual oppression because God wants us to.

Throughout most of this I’ve never got mad at God…. only asked why was this happening. But the topics, such as rape and incest and child abuse and racism and lies and more lies and confusion and insane things I couldn’t even come up with pass through my mind for no reason by these demons ……. I just don’t know. It says it’s suppose to bring us discipline and closer to God….. but now I’m more confused.

Because I kept telling this demon that kept trying to call itself God, my God would never say that…. or show me that or do that…. I feel stupid now. I don’t know what to trust anymore after being abused like this.

I’m kinda in a stank face mood about all of this processing this right now. I guess I missed this part about purposeful suffering for no reason or discipline sake. 😔☹️😣

Active Prayer 🙏

My aunt even told me that when she got sick (chronic fatigue), a few church members put hands on her and prayed. When one member checked up on her that asked if she was doing better. And my aunt responded honestly and said she did not feel better yet. 

The woman was almost offended and said that my aunt (who prays day and night) was not praying hard enough. My aunt didn’t feel well but still had her wits about her to not entertain a response. 

This “not enough” of ritualistic enactment has me baffled. When we are in the flow, our lives every step, becomes a prayer. The food we eat, the words we say, the thing we do, how we choose to interact and respond to the world. 

This is not to say we are perfect. But it is to say that we are aware, we are in peace and joy, thanks and praise.

This does not mean we turn the cheek to injustices to maintain our peace, but we respond to them from a clear mind and heart. Our peace brings peace to others. 

You are enough at every moment. Enough. 

At my uncle funeral my father said to me with tears in his eyes, “I’m not sure if I believe in God.”, I felt bad he was shaken in his human mortality. He is a nature guy. And my response was that “some people meet god at church, some meet god in nature.” His ethical and deep appreciation for nature, watching the shore lines change with his age. There is something special about that. He stared off. I’m not sure if my words stuck.

I later found out that my father had a huge problem with the church because they would beat them in chatholic school and he would excommunicated from another. The violence that he endured at school is the foundation with all things “spiritual” even incense. His feelings are valid. 

I mean even I could loose faith in a loving God through this whole demonic archonic jelly fish possession take over. But my faith was strengthened. I’m just not going to meditate/pray this many times a day and do this or that because I am enough. There is no excuse for this psychic/spiritual violence that I endure. Just as there is no reason my dad should have gotten a beaten from some nun for some mundane act.

They all serve to distract us from our faith. “Well if God was here this wouldn’t happen”, and at times this feels so true. But that is to keep us from our divinity. To keep us from the flow, in our active prayer and appreciation for Gods work.

And when are in appreciation of Gods work, we become creators too, inspired. God created the trees we carve a beautiful chair out of it (cutting down the rainforests aside). We become co-creators. Not destroyer’s of faith, the body, the mind, the family. We look to build each other up and have faith that in time…… Things will work out.

I Deserve This

Its Demon/ Shadow Entity whatever. Pretty simple …. There is no going back from this. There is no SURPRISE I was your angel spirit guide all along pushing you to what? Quit your job, ruin ever relationship, gain 100lb and sleep all day. There really is no coming back from this on any level. 

There is no prize, The demon tried to encourage me to keep going through the experience because in the end I would get my ex back or, be a better person, or some magical awakening ability. No there is no light at the end of this tunnel. You don’t get a prize for enduring pointless visions of child abuse or feeling like your brain is being sucked through a straw. There is no “upgrade” as we are designed as we should be. And I’m pretty sure any evolutionary changes would be extremely slow or generational. 

I deserve this, I clearly have done something to deserve this. Whether it was being disrespectful to my parents when I was young, being gay (who knows), having to to do sex work to survive, doing a few drugs, I might have borrowed/ stolen a couple things in my life. And while I try for the majority my hardest to be honest, I’ve definitely told some lies in my life. 

There is something I did to deserve this. Known or unknown. Do I feel like the punishment fits the crime, whatever it is….. No. But clearly that doesn’t matter. I did something or a couple of things that warrants demons being unleashed on me…. What they do from there… I guess is up to them and its not about being fair. Or balanced, or even learning a lesson at this point. I can’t even find the lesson in all of this because its just too much torture and confusion. Getting a lesson is for our own sake. It is our way of making peace. There is no prize, no lesson. 

This doesn’t excuse or make up for anything I have done. Enduring this doesn’t excuse what I have done in the past to deserve or contract this. This doesn’t wipe the slate clean. This doesnt purify. There is no lesson. Just abuse. 

There is no new age path, story or fantasy that applies. There is no cure. 

Even if my prayers and wishes came true and this Demon(s) *poof* magically went away, there is always the chance that it will come back and either try to ruin my life or make it even worse when I am down. There is no guarantee that this Demon will never come back and be gone forever.

No one will ever love me with this demon around. 

So it doesn’t matter. Nothing I do matters. 

Tale from Earthsea (True Name)

It’s funny the Entity wanted to give me/ force me to take on the name Isis because it was a mythology I read as a child. I had strange children stories when I was a kid. One was about a coconut tree and the other were ones from Egypt. My uncle went to the University of Cairo so there was always this element as a child.

Either way the Entity would always scream “She doesn’t even know her name!!” “What is your name?!” “Do you even know who you are?”

At which point I would say my birth name along with my social security number and address cause I didn’t give a fuck anymore.

There is a story about how Isis tricked Ra into giving his true name in order to take his knowledge and powers. There are various versions of this but more less that was it. (I didn’t learn this until much later and didn’t know she was so……. aggressive.) 

I read the bible a little bit in church. But I always try to fact check because people love spinning the the bible to fit their hatred. When this all started I the Entity tried to act as my mom to force me to read the bible. So I started and when I did the Entity started reading ahead of me calling me stupid, burning my vag, and just being a psychopath as usual. But the visions and torture was enough to keep me from praying and reading the bible.

At that point, I decided to keep it simple. My faith in a loving God and a prayer in my heart. Those two things I walked this whole way with because things where getting too complicated. I mean they still are. And I hope that God would understand. I’ve always been an intuitive learner anyway. I remember reading history books as a child and being like naw that don’t seem right. But thats just how I am. I am use to gentle lessons and “knowledge” that comes through a deep understanding. 

Either way. This Entity still keeps going on about how its God, and how I’m learning some lesson, like it got something to teach me REALLY. And can’t “wait till you see”… bla bla bla. I wish I had a mute button at least. 

So I watched this anime movie “Tales from Earthsea” (image above) which soothed my weakened heart. I really love the work of Hayao’s son Gorō Miyazaki, who did “Spirited Away”. They are just really beautiful, calming sweet tales. Bake a whole batch of cookies, make some hot coco, curl up in your favorite PJs and just watch this beautiful 2 hour flick. 

In a FB group today just now someone asked about information “The ones with no names”, so I googled that and the word spiritual to understand what it was all about, and came upon a beautiful bible verse. 

So it all related to my experience as well as to the beautiful movie I watched as well as this beautiful bible verse that just came up. To have a name only known between you and the True God. How precious is that?!

Granted not everything comes like many writings say. Awakening is not a DMT trip (well… It’s a trip but not an Alex Great painting) , and the “name” you receive from God will probably not be on an actual white stone. So we just gotta be chill about things.

Either way. No I have no idea what that name is. But its just such a beautiful thing to think about in this world where everything …. Including religion….  Has been tarnished. That no one could tarnishish the name the signature that God gave you.


With this Entity/ Schizophrenia it is always easy to get wrapped up in a storyline of sorts. This storyline is a distraction because its a game, a play for this Entity. And for me it is my life. The only one I have been given…. With so little time here. But there are special moments…. Messages, and symbolism that we can can cherish. So I will remain grounded in who I am and know myself to be…. While appreciating the many facets that I have organically come across in this experience. 


On Kundalini 🐍

I saw this in a forum and this really hit the mark for me. 


​“Watch out that no one deceives you. For many will come in my name, claiming, ‘I am the Messiah’ and will deceive many.” Matthew 24:5

“At that time, if anyone says to you, ‘Look, here is the Christ’ or ‘There He is’, do not believe it. For false Christs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and wonders that would deceive even the elect.” Matthew 24:23

“So when you see standing in the holy place ‘the abomination that causes desolation’, spoken of through the prophet Daniel – let the reader understand – then those who are in Judea flee to the mountains” Matthew 24:15-16

There are many who worship the 3rd eye as their personal god instead of using it properly, as a tool. Daniel 11 explains the kings of the North and South poles of our chakra system. The chapter begins with the 4th, 5th and 6th chakras of the North, the fourth king is the Crown, much richer than the other kings. The mighty king that will arise is what we call our higher self. 

The king of the South is the lower self. The commander from the South is the ego. The daughter of the Southern king (energy) is betrayed with her royal escort (kundalini) and father and the one who supported her (ego). Their next attack was successful. The South will take their gods and their silver and gold to Egypt. Egypt symbolizes the lower region of the chakra system as explained in Exodus. 

Valuables made of gold and silver represent carnal minded alchemy. The provisions of the king and the desecrated temple is the fruit in the Garden of Eden and the pineal gland. It relates to the desolation of Eden. This entire chapter relates to the internal spiritual battle of an egocentric person. 

“He will confirm a covenant with many for one ‘seven’. In the middle of the ‘seven’ he will put an offering. And at the temple he will set up an abomination that causes desolation, until the end that is decreed is poured out on him.” Daniel 9:27

“The two kings, with their hearts bent on evil, will sit at the same table and lie to each other, but to no avail, because an end will still come at the appointed time.”           Daniel 11:27

“His armed forces will rise up to desecrate the temple fortress and will abolish the daily sacrifice. Then they will set up the abomination that causes desolation.”                  Daniel 11:31

It is not supposed to be seen as an idol. Opening the 3rd eye and rising in consciousness do not guarantee your salvation. If you take your focus away from God, believing in your own power, it is the abomination that Adam and Eve, the ancient cultures (Hindus, Egyptians,  etc), committed, mentioned in Matthew 24:15.

By, Ryan Archer