Smothering the Fire 🔥

Dampening of natural god given gifts for inorganic supernatural spiritual phenomenon.

You always had gifts. It is not realized during a “spiritual awakening” it is exchanged for a supernatural experience. And look at the word supernatural. It MEANS it’s not natural it does not occur with in the natural order of things.

I reread an old blog entry where I said I felt like my “spiritual gifts” where taken away. I felt like I descended not ascended. Like it’s difficult to do art when I literally have some Demonic Alien Entity thing on my shoulder that won’t shut the fuck up. It has been difficult to connect with people because of isolation and if I do it’s difficult to do solely from the depths of my heart because I’m constantly distracted because Demonic Alien thing won’t shut the fuck up.

I’ve always been a Logic Intuitive. So I can genuinely say my Intuition is based off of logic, reason, algorithms from information I have gathered over the years. And not a need to control the future but to improve the way I or others make decision based on previous information and hopefully truthful information.

An example would be, my old roommate was thinking about buying a car to “build his credit” 🙄. I was simply talking about how awesome my friends hybrid car was because we drove maybe 4 states away on just $30 of gas. I have no idea if that is normal or not. Anyways as he moved towards buying a car I actually told him I think it’s a bad idea. Cars depreciate and it just seemed like a lot of money. To spend on in the city only to drive on the weekends. He didn’t listen and bought an extremely expensive car. Now we lived in front of a bus stop so he had to park his new car a couple of blocks away. The cars mirror got knocked off by someone. We were fighting and I almost felt like he thought it was me. He also would drive drunk and scraped up the whole side of the car and I begged him to stop driving intoxicated. So he didn’t even have the car for a year, fucked it all types of ways up and I think started defaulting on payments which did the opposite of what he wanted. It wasn’t the best decision financially or for his lifestyle. But Logically and intuitively I told him, not the best decision.

I mean that’s an OKAY example. Maybe not the best but it came to mind.

I mean I also use to read tarot cards. And even my intuition was about storytelling. While these instances were maybe more pulled out of the air than say Logical Intuition, they really weren’t because there was an inquire (question) and a tool and it was my job to just interpret the tool.

I have had many tarot readers not read my cards right. But in the moment for the inquirer it’s comforting.

Now more than ever I NEED real answers and solutions as to why I have this entity attached and how to get rid of it. Not just some 5 card spread about my (fake ass) twin flame lame love story.

A natural gift is talent. It’s ability to take emotional cues, it’s innovation, the ability to sooth or inspire others. I think so many of the Occult, New Ager and even some Christians want super powers. Like they want to be the Last AirBender or a Power Ranger. (Don’t get me wrong I want them too, but what are you collaborating with? And do you REALLY have the discernment to KNOW for sure the difference?)

Idk. I personally found a lot of these supernatural feelings, visions, voices, prophecies, experiences have been Demonic Entities. Not a “spiritual awakening” or ascension or gifts. Idk again I am only limited to my perspective of pure constant spiritual torture.

What is my spiritual “gift” seeing demons? Lol like …………. can I return it?

And seeing these demons have kept me from my friends, career, being healthy, my natural gifts, things I enjoy. Possibly the ability to take care of my family or build my own. LIFE! It’s taken over my life……

Maybe it’s just an assumption but I wouldn’t think a “gift” is not suppose to upheave your whole life and leave you in the wilderness to figure shit out yourself. Cut off the possibility of advancing in life because demonic aliens want to be fucking sadistic pedo rapist.

Yea and it started with, “aww I saw a sparkle that means an angel is with me” NOPE! Mine were positive, love and light too at first and that script got FLIPPED! So I don’t trust any of them, even though I can see them.

They want to tell the future, but I think they create the future with suggestions. To be honest. Even as someone who is tortured I can see how they harm or kill someone.

I mean they want to run every thought aspect of my life. Be it smoking, eating, pooping, sleeping, waking up, being false positive or negative thought. A false positive (to me in these situations are fake positivity only to lead up to a negative which is devastating). So an example would be the Demonic Alien voices say something like “you look pretty today……” this would only be to further humiliate me later when I go to the bathroom and look in the mirror they will say “oh never mind you’re ugly”. Now I have no problem looking at my flaws and maybe correcting them in a balanced way. If my eyebrows are looking a little bushy pluck them. But these Demonic Entities are black and white. Good only to be evil. Either or. They need to make you feel special so they can devastate you. There is no balance with them.

This is not a spiritual gift.

Why does it Hurt so bad?

I think one thing that is not talked about is the PAIN of schizophrenia/ Demonic oppression.

I mean the migraines, skull pressure or sucking, nerve pain, your body doing weird things, I actually projectile vomiting maybe 4 time since this has started (and I only puked 2 when I was drunk in my youth), tummy pains, stabbing pains that come out of no where, electrocution, brain zaps, body vibrating, burning sensation, genitals being tortured, being put to sleep or woken up when ever the Demonic Entities feel like it.

I mean these may manifest as, migraines or allergies or sciatica or frybromyalgia or seizures or insomnia. I think if I didn’t have the voices and the “hallucinations” I might have been endlessly searching for medical answers. But since I know my body and I know myself, I know what feels normal and what is not.

So far the healer I worked with alleviated the situation temporarily, the pain that was on my sciatic nerve moved back my head as migraines and jaw and facial pressure.

So the pain, the attachment has not been severed it has only moved.

I’m tired of being tormented, I’m tired of being in constant pain. I miss what it felt like before this attack.

Narcolepsy: Church

So was watching my church online like I do every Sunday (or Monday depending).

And all of a sudden the Entities knocked me out. Now the Entity woke me up at 3am and then at 12pm knocked me out mid sermon.

The Entities kept calling my pastor gay. Which I wouldn’t care if he was, but he’s not. And the Entities were trying to twist the word and Say Jesus worship is Satan worship. Which is another thing running around in the New Age/ Occult arena.

So it took me a while to figure out WHY these Entities were pushing me into Christianity in the beginning. In the beginning I believed in God above all things and Jesus as a teacher sent by God to teach us how to be better humans. However that is what the commandments are for. I did not believe that Jesus was ONLY PATH (new agey) and that he was God embodied to die for our sins, not so we can sin, but so we can be redeemed.

So I was an easy target for my ignorance.

The reason that these entities played God was so they could then disprove or then make it seem that there was no God or to make me lose faith in the feeling of abandonment as they torture me for the last 4 years.

It’s a simple bait and switch. My “spiritual journey” was at its essence trying to become closer to God and understand truth in this world of lies. And then my weird supernatural experience (caused by Entities /Demons) crossed with the crazy new age stuff I found online (which people think is spiritual) totally knocked me off my feet. And things got really confusing.

These demons are really out here trying to lure people further and further from God. To the point they are pretending to be God.

They will say they are the Voice of God or Jesus and then rape you energetically, torture you, take over your mind to the point you don’t know what is what, show you illusions so you keep running after something that essentially does not exist, because we want proof of something beyond us. Then make you feel as if God abandoned you and try to convince you there is no God.

And I’m like OK so the Demonic Entities that are TALKING TO ME, are trying to convince ME there is NO GOD. Lol how much sense does that make?

I mean the first fuck up was that they made was revealed themselves to me all. That was number one. And then THEY, these astral matrix-y demonic (acting) entities, are going to try to convince ME something doesn’t exist when in fact their mere existence was unfathomable in the first place?

It’s easy to get stuck in our immediate situation with these demonic entities. To think that is all there is. To constantly try to figure it out and blame it on new agey past life’s, karma, twin flames, not having our occult astral shields up, not doing enough witchy baths, government following you cause you went to a protest, not being of love and light…. some bs. Yea NO. And it’s easy to get into these concepts, when trying to figure out WHY AM I BEING ATTACK?!

I will be honest with you ANYONE can be attack. Sinner, the righteous, Good, bad and in between. What only truly furthers our attacks is IGNORANCE.

The lack of truth. Some of which we may never figure out and need to come to peace with that. We aren’t meant to know all the secrets of the universe lol because then that would make us God. And we are not God or Gods as much as we would like ourselves to be.

So be at peace with not knowing everything. Enough was revealed to us to know what these things are and that they attack who ever. Even Jesus in the desert for 40 days, and he is Holy!! That is how bold these demons are, they attacked the son of God, in hopes he would weaken.

So why not us?

Or a lot of us…… not all.

So know this. All of these theories. While they can help in the absence of faith to have something to cling to…… they can be VERY detrimental in the fact they can be skewed, twisted, ever evolving to get us to the point there is no God. The word of God is unmoving (well for the most part, minus slavery and stuff, BUT it says in the Bible that it must not be altered and those who did so at any point in time will face severe consequences).

You know what’s funny, is that I actually think a lot of the technologies that Target Individuals talk about exist in some fashion. I guess my point is that more likely they are NOT using it on you. Bob next door does not have DARPA weapons aimed at you and follow you everywhere you go.

But the devil knows how to get you worked up enough to think so. If you cant see through the lies then we are definitely doomed.

Man all I wanted to do is watch a sermon this morning. And I’m out here on my internet soap box.

False Teachings: Kundalini, False “Awakenings”, Ascension… The New Age 🙄

So this was a comment on a video I was watching. I can attest to the false and misleading teachings.

Again I slipped into New Age trying to find God for me. And trying to figure out why I was having “supernatural” experiences, And just found some wacky stuff. But at the heart of it there was some…… idk truth to the matter but it is only meant to suck you in even deeper.

So while I might not see the “serpent going up my back” I have seen snakes in the “astral” and I have seen these other things placed over the forehead that represents the 3rd eye.

One time I was walking down the street, neck deep in the thick of this experience. And a old school (but young) psychic woman stopped me on the street. She said she had something to tell me. And I went to her apartment. She said I had a “tear in my aura”, 🤯🙄🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ (okie dokie) she pulled some cards and asked me what do I think the blindfold represents. For some reason I said protection (and I know how to read tarot unfortunately). In that moment the blindfold for me meant protection and keeping us from seeing certain things.

I don’t know if God removed “the veils” from my eyes, but the way the Entities try to cover them is COMPLETELY different than the way I have lived my life over the last 30 summin years. Like I can actually see a black patch in front of my eyes. It’s subtle enough to not completely ruin my physical vision. But still there. This black patch (or attachment) creates visions illusions dreams. And when they remove them when they feel like it, I can see them (be it real astral or an illusion) something is there and or something put something there. So this aspect developed in 2017 a year after hearing the voices. Seeing the entities would scare anyone. Seeing Troll/Demon/ Reptilian, Alien heads Floating around, Praying Mantis, it’s uhhhh not fun. I mean some may think it’s fun but it gets old real quick. Especially once you realize you don’t really have much control over the experience.

I wasn’t even deep into yoga. Just went to two classes with my coworkers to have a “healthy lifestyle”. I’m not gonna lie I enjoyed the strengthening aspect of yoga and stretching areas that normally would not get attention. But honestly in my process of elimination I have no problem letting that go as well.

Like as much as people want to deny it SOMETHING IS UP and A LOT of people are feeling it one way or another.

I mean to me the 3rd Eye is a light receptor. That is my take. Super Natural or not, I don’t think anyone would see the “supernatural realms” if these entities were not in VERY close proximity. Like I saw sparkles when I was younger but that is an attack from a further range by an entity. But if the entity is close by (at least for me personally), you might see black shadows, actual entities, get pain in the body.

Entities as I keep reiterating in this blog , from my observations, are made up of light, light can apparently have consciousness and through their own consciousness they can create illusions with the light that they are. That is the best way I can describe it.

Some want to play with these realms and do you boo, but not me. At best I want to release myself. And that’s been my goal ever since this stuff started.

But it has been interesting putting together some of these concepts together. At least I have SOME understanding of my spiritual oppression.

Entities in the Children’s ER

So I’m with my Godson at the children’s ER because he might have the flu that has been going around.

He was sleeping and I was on my phone bullshitting and maybe an hour into the situation I felt something release from my booty (I have been feeling this weird booty energy release for a while now, pause, it’s not a fart, I have also felt this same release on my upper back/shoulder and it’s been on my right side. So a lot of pain and pressure on the left a lot of releasing on the right). So this happened and I forgot OH YEA IM DEMONICALLY OPPRESSED!

So I scanned the room to see what was up and there were the energy fields of entities on his bed and the empty baby bed in the room.

Once it saw that I saw it it shot into my right eye. But I could still see the energy mass sparkling and floating around at the foot of the bed.

Now while my godson was in the cab to the hospital he was complaining about a headache, like a really bad headache and he had a fever. And for me when the entities connect to my head i can normally get fevers and migraines. Not always together but most of the time. Like right now I have a migraine no fever. But often I do.

So I scanned his skull region to see if there was anything, and I surprisingly I did not see anything. This was prior to going inside the hospital.

So there is nothing attached to his body directly to his upper body. But there seems do be something attached to his lower legs.

Then there are other entities attached to the foot of the bed that were going wild that I saw them. My bed has entities all around them. If you think about it a bed is when we are the most vulnerable so it would make sense that that is their top favorite place. (Bathroom is probably second in my guess, cars 3rd)

So it’s saddens me SO DEEPLY that even innocent children are fair game for these Entities. But if you think about it that is how they indoctrinate us into their sick games. From a young age. We just don’t know it.

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

BIG DEEP BREATHS!

Trying not cry about how fucking gross this planet is. 🥺😭🤢🤮

Observation: Narcolepsy 🥱😴

So an an observation that has been for a while but I wasn’t sure if I could call it this was Narcolepsy.

Now I’m not saying everyone with Narcolepsy is demonically oppressed or anything.

At first I thought some of it had to do with my medication.

But after long observation and double checking my situations, even when I wasn’t on meds. I would have to say this is definitely Entity related.

Most times I won’t fight it. And I never mad a big deal out of it because most of the time I would rather sleep than deal another day with these demons.

However the first time I noticed the “narcoleptic” aspect of this schizophrenic demonic experience is when I was working with a healer. And we would write long emails back and forth.

And the entities did not want me talking to her, for whatever reason. So I was in the middle of an email fully awake and rested and they made me so tired right in the middle of the email that I had to lay down. This happened once more before I was able to finish the email. AN EMAIL YALL!

Passing me out and taking away my sovereignty for a fucking email!

Now the flip side to this same coin of making me fall asleep whenever is also waking me up when ever. So I RARELY unless I am super tired AND took anxiety meds will I sleep straight through a night like I use to.

So I have broken sleep. Waking up two or more times a night and a bunch of REM cycles. Never going into deep healing sleep.

This is what actually got me obsessed with taking Benadryl. I was either up because of the voices or passing out for short periods of time so they can play DreamWorld in my consciousness. I thought they were trying to keep me from deep sleep for a reason and I desperately wanted to just feel rested. So I ODed on Benadryl/Unisome a couple of times trying to get to deep continuous sleep.

A couple of times now more recently which moved me to write this post was that anytime I study the Bible, or listen to people who came out of the new age testify, I have been getting zonked out by the Entities.

So a lot of it has been trying to block me from spirituality it seems in some way. At least for me. Anytime I’m doing something spiritual, email to a healers, church, listening to testimonies online, they will just zonk me out. And I honestly don’t fight it. I fight a LOT of things in this experience, but sleep lower on the list.

It’s not just about the sleep. It’s about not having control over my mind and body. I can’t sleep when I want or how long I want, I can’t stay up when I want. Like I have no control of when these sensations come over my body. It’s just like the pain feelings I feel in my leg or migraines that I KNOW is the entities because I have felt them go away when I mention them (but then come back).

It’s like whatever is causing this pain or feeling or sensation is a scared little etheric animal that doesn’t want to get found out and any time I shed light on it with my thoughts it’s swims away, but then comes back when I’m not thinking about what a piece of shit it is.

That’s how they work. Mental (loud voices or suggested “subconscious thought”), Emotional (a feeling that is rationalized by a thought (mental) or vice versa), Physical (pain, sensations, exasperated medical conditions, fatigue etc).

So like for instance they can make you feel love, love for them ….. YUP. And if you want to be a fucking idiot proceed. But nah! I had maybe 3 new agers have the NERVE to tell me I am in love with these entities, are 👏 you 👏 fucking 👏 kidding me?! 👏👏And these are the same New Age assholes that tell you to “love and light” your enemy and the darkness and all this shit WHICH I did in the beginning out of pure desperation to stop being raped by them. I rationalized with them! I told them that we could work together for good! Anything else other that raping me all day and showing me visions of child abuse and incest stuff.

But IN LOVE nah! I don’t know where these people were getting their information from but it’s a lie and they are really fucked up.

I am really going off topic here.

I guess my main thing is just not feeling like I have control over my body. Like are these entities walking my body outside and in front of traffic. No. But they are passing me out, waking me up, causing pain and suffering, that redirects what I would normally do. So just like feeling pain in my head or leg every time I’m about to go outside, again trying to keep me from doing something.

Or, passing me out so I can’t write an email, or reading books ahead of me and scrambling the words so I can’t read fast and it frustrates me so I stop. Making my legs hurt so I can’t take long walks like I use to and lose weight. Or causing a migraine that makes it difficult to even complete tasks.

Not having full control over my body is not something I am use to. Like regular I stubbed my toe pain ok, but like this shit they are causing to prevent me from doing anything but take a piss I am over it.

I honestly don’t understand why God won’t just wipe these Demons out! Why allow them to have any privilege of authority to a body? Or a mind? And convince people to do bad things? It really doesn’t make sense to me.

I gave my life to God and it’s like God is saying NOPE. If I would have believe these demons were God, like they said they were, my suicide attempts would have been successful.

This is all really fucked up. And I see all these other people getting forgiven and saved from these demons. But not me.

It’s like SUPER depressing.

Kitchen Witch 🌿🌸🌿

So my friend sent me a video of some New Age witchy ways to remove a curse. (Not you Tess)

Now I will be honest I LOVE witchy stuff. Herbs, crystals, oils, candles, incense, the craft, alters, learning about mythology, symbolic meanings, all that stuff I love it I think it’s pretty, it’s smells nice, i like learning about the history. I like the art.

Recently I threw away all my stuff. Tarot, crystals necklaces, books etc.

Understanding how these Entities work to a limited extent, this is WAY beyond an intention spell/prayer to arch angel Michael, salt baths and white light.

Honestly if I have guides, angels, ancestors, God, spirit animals, alien star seeds, on my side wouldn’t they be kicking this entities ass already? Wouldn’t they have prevented me from being psycho-spiritually raped everyday for 4 years? Which continues.

Why do I have to light a candle when I can speak directly to the”energy” which is a conscious entities and tell them to leave NOW. And they tell me “I’m not done yet!” Or “one more year” every year?

As I have said before something is not adding up in all of this. And I know a lot of it comes from my “perspective” of being tortured. But I did the work, I got out of fear, I stood up to these pieces of shit. I dropped all these New Age wrappings of excuses for entity torture, And they tell me “I’m not done yet!”.

Done doing what?

Because I’m not playing the game anymore. I’m not playing this twin flame game anymore, I’m not playing the targeted individual game where the government is monitoring me anymore. I’m not playing this matrix ascension game anymore.

Ascending to where?

I’m woke as fuck!

So woke I’m tired!

So what exactly are these entities getting out of this and masking it as some belief system?

I am so beyond this New Age shit.

And I am over this experience.

I’ve honestly have done almost all I can humanly do.

What’s interesting is that healing work or certain witchy things actually helped my friend, but not me. We would do the same things sometimes or even she would be so kind to gift me a healing session from the same healer in the past and they would not work for me or they might stop a migraine but not the full experience.

Other reiki healers would ask if I felt anything and I would say pressure on my skull and they would say “that is me” and it would hurt and nothing would come about it. You are working with “energy” but that energy is a conscious being which you have agreed to work with and collect money to do this “healing work” that did nothing for me be give me a fucking headache.

So again I’m not sure what’s going on EXACTLY, but I am ready to kick some ass.

You have no idea how gross this shit is. Seeing entities (smaller) attach to my genitals or to my breast and stimulate me randomly. Some deep in my gut making me sick, photos of them attached to my brain causing migraines, seeing them swim around in and out of my field. Little animal beings attacked to my eyes. It’s YUCK 🤢!!!!!! Like WTF!

I mean I really tried to rationalize all of this. I really don’t think I’m crazy, but I am having a crazy experience which most can not fully relate to and thus I am being seen as crazy.

But if it’s some pretty witchy, ascension shit that’s all gravy. Like fuck out of here.

And I said in a comment before. Like if this is just the chain of life. Like we eat plants (and animals) for sustenances, and then “spirits” entities, I don’t know, absorb our electromagnetic field energy to survive then OK, BUT whatever the FUCK THIS SICK SHIT mofo is, takes it to levels beyond fathomable with rape and torture and showing me child porn or saying I want to fuck my family members and then raping me. Like what the actual fuck?

All because I didn’t play the Twin Flame game and I won’t go into a hypnotic paranoid delusional state. Or accept their negative thoughts as my own? Because I know who the fuck I am and I know how I think and I know my intentions. I have been me all my life! And they are going to try to step in all of a sudden and tell me who I am and I am suppose to “surrender” to the process. Nah!

So honestly all these rituals are not gonna do it for me. I can set my intentions right now! I have with giving up everything! To show how serious I am. And now I am in a stand off with these Entities. I won’t play their game and now they got be physical to stop me from being me. To keep me in bed laid up with pain and fatigue.

Do you know they can wipe me out in a matter of seconds. Like one moment I can be fine and then the next they will make me so sleepy out of no where! Then wake me up an hour or two later. And any time I try to make progress in my life they create a pain in my body that feels like every cell is screaming. Like damn y’all I’m just trying to go to the grocery store and y’all gotta attach some bullshit that makes it painful to walk half a block?

So they want me home going to sleep and waking up to torture me when ever they want. This shit is hell! I am angry and I don’t deserve this shit! No one does if you think about it in the grand scheme of things!

I a specific prayer to remove these entities (which I cited in this blog) and you know what I got a FULL BLOWN ATTACK. I saw more entities enter my home in a a white mist and attach to the lining of my apartment. And large entity and maybe 30 smaller entities hovered over my bed and electrocuted me and then they all shot these “sparkles” into my stomach. My stomach started to rumble and felt like things were knocking around in my tummy and then immediately I had the WORSE period cycle ever.

They are going above and beyond to torture my body because I refuse to play their black magic mind games!

Like this shit has to stop!

I feel Numb

Not numb emotionally, like my body has this sensation of numb all over. But certain parts.

Like the right side of my face and the left side of my thigh and my right big toe. My right arm.

I woke up to this strange sensation. I was a bit manic the night before the voices woke me up at 3am as usually but I just decided to stay up and then go to my friends house in the morning.

When I came back home I took a Gabapentin to go to sleep and ensure I would stay asleep during the middle of the night. While Gabapentin doesn’t help on a regular bases it does help stop “manic episodes” of sleeplessness and ensures I will stay asleep. As I stated in this blog before, I’m not sure why, but sleep is SUPER important to me. I use to be someone who didn’t sleep much #teamnsleep prior to schizophrenia.

But now I need a lot of rest to face another day of entities attacking me I whatever way they choose to for that day.

Anyways so I slept pretty good. Woke up this morning but feeling this numb but almost light buzz feeling in my body.

So I’m documenting it. I’m not sure if it’s medical or spiritual. Even though I know both intertwine, spiritual sensations can be an illusion. So if I feel like I’m having a brain aneurism or seizures because I’m being attacked by Entities, and I go get an extensive brain scan (which I did) and they say all is fine. Its difficult to navigate what is a real concern or symptom vs what is not an illusion. And now I can’t play like I use to and go to the doctor for everything because my insurance changed and a lot is coming out of pocket.

Soooo fuck that.

Anyway so this numb feeling is strange and difficult to describe. I still hear frequencies around me. I still see the watery mosey Entities around me. I’m just not sure what’s going on with my body because I can’t see myself fully objectively.

Like I could see my godson one time and he said he didn’t feel good (noted in this blog) he said he had a headache and tummy hurt. And prior to that he was acting SUPER emotional. And I wasn’t sure what was going on I just had regular earthly concerns. I didn’t think these little fucking devils would actually attack a child. BUT THEY DO! And I scanned his body with my eyes and I saw a blue or purple entity right on the top of his head. Practically tap dancing on his shit! And I had to talk to a healer friend who said he had a devil and I had one too but he was unsure of where it came from. I know about my own clearly. I hear, see, feel them all the time, but a child?!

Anyways so this numb feeling has me a tiny worried not gonna lie. Like I’m like did these demons destroy my nervous system attacking me so much that my nerves are LITERALLY SHOT?

Idk. Just documenting.

Observation: False Fear (and other emotions) caused by entities. 👽👻💩

So while I am all about feeling your feels. I also want to touch on false emotions caused by demonic entity oppression.

The easiest instance that I can explain is that entities have watched and observed us collectively or individually enough to mimic our emotions. The good news is that they don’t do it very well.

Often I think the easiest emotions are anxiety or depression. Now this does NOT mean that someone can not suffer from anxiety or depression. I mean we all have moments that worry us or sadden us. That is natural what is not natural is when we do not feel connected to them. Often the entities will pretend to be self talk in order to excuse the emotion that they place with in us. Again this can be anger, anxiety, depression, fear, jealousy, sexual attraction and even LOVE.

J worked through a lot of the anxiety and depression. I know who I am and was able to discern quickly that something wasn’t right even though I didn’t have language or examples to connect to. So when I felt anxiety I breathed through it because often it was a more physical emotion, like a beating in my chest accompanied by racing thoughts. Mimicked depression is more subtle. I think despite my situation I have done a lot of work to keep a balance with in the situation. I allowed myself to soothe myself as I experienced this unimaginable experience. I blogged, made art, watched my favorite movies, stayed away from triggers until I was ready to face them.

I did what I needed to do to stay in my sweet spot of calm while this horrific experience unfolded around me. I was fortunate. But I know others are not. Many face homelessness, living with unsupportive people, the stress of daily life, work …. kids etc. so I know it’s not easy to really sit back and observe the situation if you don’t even have the time to do that due to life.

I think the easiest example I can explain this (which I have mention in this blog) is that at times the Entities will reveal themselves to me either in space (floating) or in my mind (eyes). The times that they have done this they would say my name or word suddenly and jolt/electrocuted my body or my chest to make it seem like I was scared of them when I saw them. I’m honestly not scared. I might be naturally startled, but scared and in the extreme feeling they try to create nope. Like they are literally acting like deranged psycho kids trying to scare me. And this is mostly due because I won’t give them the emotions or the play like I use to so now they are going on divergent levels of physical pain.

So that is an example of False Fear. I have been seeing the Entities for a couple of years now so I’m not scared of them. If anything I was curious because I thought I could figure out how to make them go away. But that was a fruitless endeavor for me. All I can do is discern and see them and document and share the information I have observed.

I don’t think people understand how every cell in my body screams when they are connected to me or around me. Like it almost literally feels like trying to squish multiple spirits in a body like a suit case that is overflowing. My cells and muscles make a crunching, snapping or release sound sone times when I stretch because there are smaller entities are attached.

It’s like being hooked up to an EKG or something, like the larger entity has all the multiple smaller entities attached to different parts of your body to give you the full on matrix virtual feeling but they are a miss. And their attachment hurts, essentially in the head.

So when you are say worried that a loved one hasn’t called you, (which is natural), the entities will take it a step further and exasperated the worry and the feeling and start saying things to like, “they are mad at you”, “something happened to them” and if they are attached to your eyes show you images/visions of your loved one harmed.

I’m not sure WHY THEY DO THIS! But they are relentless! I mean I honestly don’t understand why this entities haven’t gone away. I mean they are literally beating a dead horse.

And it sucks because I have to be SUPER MINDFUL of my emotions. Like if it’s an overwhelming feeling, for example they will give an emotion like I am in love with them which is FAAAAAAAAAAR from any time of truth, I will recognize it as what it is and let it roll by, what until it’s over, and KNOW that that feeling is false. But sometimes ones like depression or self loathing can be more difficult to shake. Like a week or so ago I literally felt the false emotion of depression/sadness and it took upmost The Who day to shake it and it didn’t go away until I mentioned it to a healer friend. Like I felt the release and it left my body, and my body just relaxed in a way I can’t fully explain to you.

So, be aware of your feelings, if you actually connect with it or if what the trigger might have been, ground yourself in reality and speak the positive in your mind (because worrying won’t change the situation and you won’t know what to do until you know), pray, and don’t give these demonic entities anything!