You Are Welcome πŸ™

I was practicing a Chi breathing technique on YouTube that a friend sent to me.

I noticed some blocks and add ons but whatever I always notice.

Either way, it talked about creating chi and then bringing it back into the body.

I rememered a moment when this all first started happening and my chest extending out past my shoulders felt like I was opened up. That’s when I first started to feel like I was dying.

I didn’t feel much in my center now, just this tender heart. I figured the entity took all my chi, that’s why all I can do right now is sleep, eat cookies and cry about the world.

The guy talking in the video said that we are “the most powerful free energy devices on the planet”.

So I immediately told the Entity, “you are welcome….” And I meant it. I wasn’t being sarcastic as usual. It was a gift.

I figured that I gave (well it took) my energy to this Entity. I just don’t know how to reve my chi back up yet……

…… Wonder if instead of scaring the shit out of me, disrespecting me, violating, if other entity beings whatever where to be upfront? Maybe we could live peacefully. 

Entity would be like, “Yo I really need this chi, I will make it quick.”

They won’t and… Maybe can’t tell me who or what they are. Maybe I’m too peace loving and just feel like if we just put the truth out there it would easier for all of us and work something out. 

Who knows, maybe I would be like “sure homie, you can have some of this chi love!” And i would just go wipe some more up later.

I can give with out receiving. But I don’t know I just need a bit of honesty.

Who knows maybe chi doesn’t even exists. Maybe I am pulling this out of my ass. Maybe they don’t need all this brain electric goodness or this golden chi.

All I know is, there has to be a better way.

πŸŒΏπŸŒΉπŸ‘€πŸ‘½πŸ™βœŒπŸŒΉπŸŒΏ

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Crazy Talks: What I See πŸ‘€

Just jotting down some notes.

I don’t see this on anyone else but myself.

There are two very distinct things I see other than the visions. I see the these circle dots that can divide into multipuls. And I see this vibrating heat wave looking thing that moves in and out of me. Think like a clear slimmer from ghost busters. 

So I was commenting on a post to a lady that says she can remove implants and the slimmer thing shot out of my stomach and my stomach/ back area vibrated trembled and I could see it moving around outside of me. 

Noe occasionally I during the day will get headaches or I will feel the pressure on my head and I will hear almost like a distant train tremble vibration. I think this vibrating clear thing is the pressure I feel on my head, the anxiety, its like its the ….. Emotion and sensation maker. I don’t know if it is a separate entity or controlled. My guess it is controlled. 

Now the circle dot thing seems to be the visions/ dreams/ hallucinations/ Logo maker. But I’m not sure to what extent it morphs and uses light. If I pinch the corners of my eyes I see a circle of light in each corner. Not sure if this is bad or good. But I’m sure it plays its part. I have literally seen visions (waking dreams) fade away into almost a logo (a simple none color emoji vision), I have also seems dreams fade as well. 

So I see this dot thing that was never there before as the cause of the visions. And this energy slimmer thing as the cause of the sensations I feel. 
After it jumped out of my stomach it went for GUESS WHERE you guys??!?? My VAGINA! Of course! My vagina! I felt it go there after it shot out.

I’m really over this Scooby doo mystery. Seriously. 

“Archon Mind Parasite Self-Defense”

This video is interesting and grounding. 

1. While I truly enjoy understanding the “chakra system”, I believe it is a great way of understanding and bring mindful of the part of our body. I also do not truly believe we have 7 cones of energy. I think it can be a good way to understand organs and parts of the mind by compartmentalizing these idesas but not as an actual system. The concept is fine….. But diving deep into the illusion of being some super human is where we get caught by these Entities. 

We are electromagnetic, this is true. We have metals in our body. But how that actually looks I have no idea. 

2. As stated these beings will pretend to be anything of authority. And will play off of both bad and “positive” emotions or words to control. So it really is a double edge sword. So I have narrowed the single most important thing is ignorance. Lack of awareness will have you pulled in so many different directions. Happy sad angry. So when we are aware that these being are trying implant mistrust or fear anger or even manic happiness we are not in control. 

3. More recently I “saw” visuals that were not visions of “light” that looked like a couple of different things. One looks like maybe 20 circles inside of each other, another like jellyfish lights, others are sparks of “light” or globs of colorful “energy” that looks like its leaving my being . This is false light , this is not real light. It is not coming from the sun, or a lamp. I doubt it is coming from me. But even if this “light” is coming from me, the fact that it is being tampered with to create “light” is still false. So be careful of being lured by “the light”. All that glitters is not gold.

4. Between being in spiritual forums and schizophrenic forums to just everyday interactions it is very easy to see how we are all affected. Its easy to observe.

5. I have no idea how to get rid of these things. Again prior to being “attacked” I was on an organic diet and fairly happy with only a break up that rattled my spirit. However prior to this full fledged experience, I can recall up until the age of 15 where these beings have been around me. Or have acted as “spirits” of loved ones, or “angels” or supposed “spirit guides. Being young, i just accepted it as such cause i didnt know any better. Movies, religion and so on talks about spirits, angels, demons, ect so it is socially acceptable. I moved on with my life. But this ignorance, because no that was not my deceased grandma or grandpa, and no that flash of light was not an angel trying to help you, that ignorance is what comes to haunt me later.  

Don’t get me wrong, that idea of believing in angels or the spirit of our loved ones “being with us”, there is nothing wrong with this idea. If we want to embody the archetype idea of an angel is fine,if we want to comfort ourselves with the idea of our deceased loved ones looking down on us or living on “through us” as a form of ancestry that’s fine. Poetic of sorts. But these ideas can also be manipulated by these beings. In fact anything can if we don’t have our Witt’s about us. 

So again its not a clear cut answer.

Lol but if I find one I will surely let you know. For now I am careful what I believe and keep things simple. Because these parasites are always trying to drag me into a storyline so they can position themselves in a place of power rather than what they really and truly are. 

No Walk in the Park

I’m overwhelmed by media, internet and spiritual fuckery.

I tried going outside to a park as suggested and sit by a tree and eat some fruit. So I went deep into central park, found a cool tree and sat down (finished my smoothie). Took a few deep breathes and as soon as a group of children and their parents where walking up from behind me I here “child molestor” a few times in the children’s voice. I even felt/ heard a little snap happen before the voices and it was also like space around me expanded (prolly doesn’t make sense). I’m glad it doesn’t. 

I know I’m not, I know that is not what those children said. I’m just over it and upset. Like what the fuck?

What the fuck does this Entity want?!

I tried really hard to calm down to finish my time there meditating. I went to another part of the park… Grassy. But its like I just can’t enjoy being outside. Its so much effort and so draining emotionally and mentally to have to constantly be keeping my self in check so I don’t just freak out. Its like being in a horror film 24/7 even in your dreams. Every thing you hear, see, smell, feel, actually do or dont do is a potential threat. I have to be on high alert always. 

Even in my “I don’t care” mood I can’t help but notice the black sparkles around me now. I can’t help but wonder. I have no choice in hearing the constant voice (Entity) the replays my life over and over and twisting lies so I feel like shit. 

So I want to detox from the internet so bad…. But I don’t know what else I would or could do that wouldn’t strip me of my energy or cast me into another delusional set about some fucked up shit.

I don’t know what to do any more. 

Mandala Effect and Targeted Individuals

Just some thoughts.

Mandala Effect I wonder if the mandala effect has to do with “targeted individuals”. I mean I wrote it off as just people being misinformed. I mean our memories aren’t always the best. But there is also our “minds eye” or “third eyes” or “imagination” so when we are asked a question we access it in some way. So I wonder if those who believe something to be one way and not the other are under “mind control” as “targeted individuals”. Just a theory.

Gang Stalking. From what I read many people believe they are being stalked or followes by a group or organization. And while this may be true as a “target individual”, one I doubt they would make themselves so obvious. And two its a part of the “paranoid schizophrenia” “play”. In my own experience the VOICE  or Entity, whatever you want to call it…. Would make me believe it was my ex and his friends doing this to me. Then it moved to my place of work and it was my coworkers. Then moved to my home and almost everyone in NYC had something to say about me. Talk about gang stalking, how about about a whole borough “bullying” you? It was/ is intense to say the least and makes it difficult to go outside and engage the world like I use to. Once I realized this is impossible… For EVERYONE in NYC to be talking about little old me things changed. Once I realized it is impossible for my ex and his friend (who lived on the other side of the country) to psychic telepathic access to me to bully me. Things changed. Once I realized that THE VOICE(s) were talking too fast to be two different people things changed. So while it still happens some times…. I don’t believe it. It is just ONE Entity simulating this nasty ass shit.

As I said before, like I wonder if this how people get hurt or go crazy and hurt people thinking they are doing this shit to them, or suicide cause they are lost in some sick simulation overlay. 

Types of voices. You may notice both a pitch or frequency accompanied by a white static noise. Try ear plugs and touching certain parts of your body like ears or neck … Or affected areas or closing your body in yoga positions. The tones may change. But I pray that you not hear them if you are uncertain. The types of voices I noticed are as followed.

Main Voice: I’m not sure if some people are even able to get there. But once you get past the paranoia or characters or actual people that IT is hiding behind … You may find one voice. I’m not sure how that may play out for individuals because each have a different experience. But this is in relation to “targeted individuals” and the feeling of “gang stalking”. My particular Voice or Entity attachment…. Is intelligent, manipulative, obsessive, lies, I could say creative, but for this experience is absurdly abusive and inhumanly psychotic. May present itself as an archetype of authority, God, Jesus, Goddesses, Buddha, Ex partners, Bosses, Satan, Aliens, Angels, Parents, etc so that you feel powerless. Which in that moment may very well feel true. This “Main Voice Entity”, orchestrates most of the experience. The main voice may very well emulate YOU. So while its orchestrating it is suggesting you (light images, memories, or actual “subconscious thought”) how to respond or placing false feelings.

The Scream: This one often sounds like a distant scream that repeats over and over. Usually negative. May be “fuck you” or “bullshit” or “you’re crazy” “you’re ugly” or something that means something to you. Tends to rhyme. At one point I called it Rumpelstiltskin. But repeats it over and over again. This one also tends to be melodic. So you may hear music like sounds off of running water or other ambient sounds like a fan or humming of a car. 

Voice(s) / Gang Stalking: So this one is difficult. One, being paranoid is natural in natural situation. Walking down a dark ally sure. Stepping out of your house to get some almond milk in broad daylight…. Not so much. The Voice Entity is an opportunitist and will exploit any situation. So if you think your Boss passed you up for a promotion it is going to maybe you felt down or depressed … angry…. This Entity Voice will make you go postal… Hopefully not literally.

So my theory is that The ONE Voice Entity controls the “many”. The one that sings, the one that screams in the distance, the one that says your name randomly, the one that make you think people in your life are out to get you (but hey who knows), the one that makes you think your being gang stalked, that the TVor radio is talking to you, talking to dead relativites or people far away, The one that makes you think you heard someone say some crazy shit and they didnt, the one that makes you think you are taking to goddesses or aliens. 

I can’t say what this…. Exactly… But that is what I have realized for myself. It doesn’t make it any less debilitating.

This post is just on voices I could go on about the whole experience. But it rarely ever makes any sense. So as with “targeted individuals” while I can relate with the experience and can see it relate with other experiences as well (spiritual awakening “purging” “dark night of the soul” or Kundalini symptoms and “surrendering”ect) there is always that one piece missing. 

Who, How, and Why?