Painting: No Thinking 🌙

(Painting Post from Yesterday)

” Too often when i try to draw or paint the voices would argue about what i should be painting it would upset me and so i stopped being creative for a very very long time. I drew a few portiats of the voices but my own art they wouldn’t let me do.

I’m trying not cry writing this.

So today as a suggestion 6 months ago by a remote healer Theresa Crabtree she told me to paint. I tried and the voices argued about which thought to paint and I became overwhelmed. I didn’t know how to not NOT paint my worlds. So today i just made a playlist called “healing the goddess” on YouTube played that all day and layed thick coats of of my favorite colors of paint. I didnt think too much about the paint strokes just let them fall played with them. Tried to have fun it even though the voices tried to suck the fun out it.

Now i wish i had endless money, paint and canvas so i could just paint all day and not pay attention to these voices. I felt empty afterwards in a strange way, alone again with the voices, i never had happen when i made art I always felt filled up or satisfied. Now I just want to stop feeling empty and paying attention to the Demonic voices with more mindless painting.”

Untitled, acrylic 2018

Hh

Advertisements

Furies: Demons of Vengance

So I was watching Once Upon a Time and they talked about a Fury demon that takes a life for another.

I never noticed the picture but it looked very similar to the Demon here that I see occasionally. I assume its female because of the long hair that’s always whipping around but that’s not necessarily true.

I always reference this as a Banshee or an Original Fairy. Either way I unsure what the vengeance part is for because I have never screwed anyone over. If anything I always got the shit end of the stick and I always did the work within myself to to eventually forgive and let it go. 

This is the shit end of a stick I received yet.

Cause I feel more and more clueless. 

One girl in my schiz Facebook group drew a picture of the exact same thing I see and it that demon kept asking “where is my child?”, I also had similar delusions with the voices saying “you will never be a mother!”. 

But that doesn’t bring any more clarity as to why this particular demon is here and or how to get rid of it. 

I thought it was cleared in the soul clearing work I was doing but apparently they just cycle through taking turns.

Do these Fury demons work for reptilians harvesting human souls or light or spiritual energy so they may live longer? 

Trick you into going mad and finally taking your life! 

————————————

In Greek and Roman mythology, the Furies were female spirits of justice and vengeance. They were also called theErinyes (angry ones). Known especially for pursuing people who had murdered family members, the Furies punished their victims by driving them mad. When not punishing wrongdoers on earth, they lived in the underworld and tortured the damned. The Furies could also appear as storm clouds or swarms of insects.

Read more: http://www.mythencyclopedia.com/Fi-Go/Furies.html#ixzz5320xRn8B

Archons: Revisited 👽

living entity archon alien being (2).jpg

So I can see “Archons” in 3D which are described either undeveloped human fetus (a human cell) and or a Reptilian. From my observation, the Archons – human cell-like discs are an AI of sorts and a Portal. The Reptilian or other beings can pop in and out of them.

These portals change in size depending on environments and can move around but usually staying tethered to an ideal spot. I can hear when they are moved or possibly more portals are pushed through another portal (I’m only like 30% sure on the latter).

So I believe the gnostic text mistook as Archons (that look like human cells) are actually almost like a living and intelligent portal.

The Entities usually pop halfway out only showing a face or face and arms or just an image. I only see 2D/3D-ish.

Now many people have them. The Portals. Above their head. At least one I would assume. As I said there is a fleet of entities in my actual body. Each time I think I make emotional and mental progress I only see more and more showing up in my field. So it is a bit confusing. But I assume that’s half of the point of all of this is to keep me.. or many confused. What was once 1 dot (archon) say like early this year turned to two by June, then into maybe 8 this fall and now turned to 24+ like this morning.  I know the blood pressure is high BECAUSE of the connection with the Entities… which only creates a cycle that I must find the strength to break. But I am willing to give modern medicine a shot to feel SOME relief.

I am unsure of why we are set up I like this. But I know this wasn’t our built intention.

I also feel that we as humans or souls may have an ability to create worlds and universes …. and we have been contained from doing so. Like endless fractal of universes. (totally hippy speculation just wondering and thinking)

So I’m not sure what these entities deals are with viciously attacking people.

If you haven’t noticed I am hyper-aware of myself and my body and surroundings. It literally feels like being dropped in the middle of a battlefield. I just got my anti-psychotics, I haven’t taken them but have noticed that the Entities are already pre-testing the prep work for “depression”. Probably because they read somewhere in the schizo facebook groups that some people feel depressed or numb because of meds. They are THAT slick! THAT slick! That’s how desperate they are. I haven’t even taken the meds yet! All I can do is just laugh at the BS.
The archon AI human cell looks very much like old school UFO’s and also halos depicted in many one religious paintings.
I guess they only pop out of the portal when they really want to scare you out of your natural born life.
641362-ufo
1007sergius.jpg
IMG_0140.JPG

Soul Star Chakra 🌟: Archon Halo ☁ 👼 ☁

So…………. The Archon’s portal energy balls I see on peoples heads and including my own look like halos you see in paintings. Straight up, no bullshit….. They are not glowing but they can invert from dark in the middle to light/clear on the outside or vice versa considering the lighting situation inside.

Last year my “twin flame” therapist told me about the “soul star chakra” which is also known as the “halo chakra”.

Simple stated in the link above “Your 8th Chakra known as the Soul Star Chakra is located about 12 inches to 3 feet from the top of your head (just above your Crown Chakra). Your Soul Star Chakra contains infinite energy, spirituality, Divine Wisdom and compassion. Also known as the Halo Chakra it’s what you see depicted in the historic paintings of Jesus Christ, the Saints and other Divine Masters. This chakra is the essential bridge between your Higher Self/Soul Self in the higher dimensions of reality and your incarnated human self (your personality and physical expression of your soul in third dimensional reality).

As your Soul Star Chakra becomes activated and expands you’ll begin to feel a strong need to align yourself with your Soul’s Mission to finally BE what you know on deeper levels you’re here to BE.”

Only I magically got the opposite! Why I gotta get the Satan halo? Is it suppose to be painful? This painful? 

Many people are saying that yes the body has natural chakras … And 3rd eye and all this good stuff but for some reason these natural systems are being manipulated and information is being falsafied so they can take advantage of us. 

There is an overlay. And its so painful. Like why doesn’t anyone tell you hey as some point you gonna get a half and shit it painful cause inter dimensional entities will prolly suck up you brain juices. I need a manual for this shit. 

Monster Logos ❤


Not all but many of the “energy”, entities, aliens, archons whatever you want to call them have a … Logo of sorts. I would assume, since they seem to be a hivr mind ad they attach to a humans individuality they long for that same separation. Thus a representation …. A logo of themselves of sorts.

Either way….. Each being…. Yes is individual in a way or for the moment…. And they CAN tether to you to sustain it self itself in whatever form that truly is. 

Just as they tether they can disconnect…. But who wants to find a new victim to learn? 

No I have seen “energy” or Entities that DID NOT connect to me physically and did not force itself to stay in my field or my home. 

I have to keep reminding myself there is a good spiritual world. And just because I have been forced to see this side that doesn’t make me a bad person for trying to understand and not leaving it to prayer alone. The Entities often try to guilt me…. Saying I’m a bad christian or something like that…. Because I donyt leave this to prayer alone. Again, Me, God, Meds. 

One of my friends told me about a story where she was in s parade in Chile and she fainted and then a shaman help her friend carry her to a place and then the shaman blew smoke on her back and pulled out like a teddy bear smoke logo. This teddy bear was a teather from an entity attempting to attach or hide in her. But was removed. 

Just like I had logos #, 👽, X, ❤  of all kinda stuff on arms and body. I can see but I can not remove them.

If I look directly where I know there is an “energy field” portal, alien demon whatever…. It will spew something at me…. It will sparkle maybe black maybe white and then I will see a smaller “portal” near me or a logo on my skin or my third eye. 

When I take photos of my face…. It legit looks like a child scribbled on my forehead. Especially the 3rd. I don’t know how long they last, or if they wash off in a shower… Or what. 

But sorry we want our people to be spiritually OK they need to know this shit good or bad.if you are walking around with a naked lady in your arua masterbating then that’s fucked up. That’s what I saw in this one guys field…. And he knew what I was talking about. I never a full figure before. 

I have no interest in playing with these entities…. Or anyone else for that matter when it comes to this. I seek to be free of the bullshit that is not me. Like this is basic shit. 

Black Obsidian: Root Chakra

So last night that insane “root chakra” vibrating rumble, burning, pin prick almost feels like my core is being yanked out…yea that feeling happened and so I put this obsidian on my vagina (non sexual yall, sorry its the demons fault I even think like that now).

Uhm it didn’t stop the vibration because then it just intensified… But it seems like it diverted it for a little while from directly with my cells. 

The virbatiin happens from the thighs all the way to the vagina area…. Sometimes a little further up into the actual reproductive system…. Sometimes feel like and empty yanking….. You know when your stomach growls… It feels like that but then a yanking sensation.

I know its one of those portal archon disks that’s doing this to me. They can get big or small…. Right small enough to be on the clit area and super annoying or large enought to include my thighs. I put my hand down there and usually it stop it but this time it was  so strong I could feel the buzz with my hand. 

I have used my thighs to squeeze it out more times then I have the energy for. Some say its “kundalini”. But can you actually push kundalini out if its naturally part of your spiritual body? 

Also there is no progressions to it. Kundalini I thought was suppose to progress in come way. 

I have had “kundalini” like sensation go up my back, very similar to to the root chakra…. But that always feel like a leaving sensation. 

It doesn’t make me feel good. I don’t like it I have no idea what’s going on….. Or why or the point of it all.

I just feel violated. I’ve never violated anyone. Ok maybe tickling my sister.

Either way the crystal didn’t help. Yes I cleaned them. Everyone keeps telling me to use crystals and so far they are only beautiful objects. A security blanket in the freezing winter.

——-+

UPDATE Google Doc SearchDoctor diagnosed Vibrating Vagina. I finally got the nerve to ask my doctor about the vibrating/humming sensation in my vagina. … He said the sensation is due to blood flow. The blood flow can cause turbulence which results in the vibratingfeeling.

———

I mean blood flows….  But in that way there is a stimuli like when you are with a lover…. Or there is a threat to the body. So just blood flow is not a good enough answer for me. But it is ONE biological answer. When I would squeeze my thighs until I heard a crunch I would see the fast clear circle shoot out from legs. 

Sometimes I wonder if I’m fucking myself up more than these aliens are just trying to figure out what’s happening to my body and why I don’t feel connected to it. 

Idk. I hate this. 

Spiritual Bypassing Revisited. 😲😲😲

So spiritual bypassing. 

We are basically saying that if you don’t get almost literally spiritually jumped and cosmically punched in the face that you don’t get the badge of honor of being “inept”. To………… What? 

Do y’all see how we are perpetuating abuse even through our spiritual communities. 

We allow these “spirits” entities to cause harm and then run around thinking its an honor….. And we are enlightened. 

GUYS FUCK THAT!

FUCK THAT TODAY AND TOMORROW AND FOREVER FUCK THAT!

Basically you are enabling cosmic spiritual bullying.

And we are suppose to grow from that?!

Think about how fucking backwards that is? 

Its perpetating abuse.

If someone is in an abusive relationship do you tell them to stay in the relationship and forgive them while they are being beat? 

A lot of these people going around talking about accept the dark and light…. And spiritual bypassing never been raped by some random ass entity and then being told to forgive them. Forgiveness is a process. And protecting ones self is the first step. Abuse stopping is the first step. 

And forgiveness is a choice. 

I’ve always been like this. Ever since school. School is forced… Information forced…. Most of its a lie to perpetuate ignorance. Most of its not useful and most what actually learn and find useful is on the job you are forces to engage in to survive. 

Let’s really rethink the spiritual concepts we spew out. All we are doing is excusing entitities, energies, demons, whatever to play a roll in our lives, and there shouldn’t be any. They made their choice. And they keep making their choice the more you allow them to “punish” or abuse us senselessly which only enables their bad behavior.

Its not a badge of honor….. It’s ignorance. 

🙏

Lightened Photo

If I didn’t see this shape drop down in front of my eyes or mark my skin then I would say hey this prolly just a camera glitch.

This is the first time I caught on camera what I was drawing.

No one else is seeing it…  And its clear as day and making me feel crazy. And I thought I was a rational person. 


Triggered: Goddess Isis 🐝

As I said before when I was a kid my family gave me a lot of Egyptian stuff. Books, kits, games, writing stuff, art …. going to the museum. So it was something that always stuck with me.

But the Demonic Archon was forcing me to say “I AM Isis” and then called itself Osiris (my ex twin flame) and was raping me and calling me a child molestor and then forcing me to be christian and then trying to force me into suicide (“for my twin flame and dying of molestation”) and just all kinda shit. Just fucked up shit. 

And so like you know shit comes up on Facebook about goddess…. Like whatever …. But it Isis came up a few times today and I feel triggers. Like something that was special to me…. Has been defiled. it just reminds me of rape. That was something my family gave to me.

They rape visions as Isis…. Where fucked up. Like idk.

I don’t know what the point of all of that was or is.

So…. Whatever. 

Photo of what I usually see

Like this is the most obvious photo I have taken. I would zoom in or not have it on a white background or in bright lights so your eyes can adjust. Im trying to look at it now in my bathroom lights and all I see it a black photo. 

If I’m totally bugging let me know. 

The photos of what I drew are here. I have seeming them for 6+ months. I think one or more contribute to the schizophrenia.