Smothering the Fire 🔥

Dampening of natural god given gifts for inorganic supernatural spiritual phenomenon.

You always had gifts. It is not realized during a “spiritual awakening” it is exchanged for a supernatural experience. And look at the word supernatural. It MEANS it’s not natural it does not occur with in the natural order of things.

I reread an old blog entry where I said I felt like my “spiritual gifts” where taken away. I felt like I descended not ascended. Like it’s difficult to do art when I literally have some Demonic Alien Entity thing on my shoulder that won’t shut the fuck up. It has been difficult to connect with people because of isolation and if I do it’s difficult to do solely from the depths of my heart because I’m constantly distracted because Demonic Alien thing won’t shut the fuck up.

I’ve always been a Logic Intuitive. So I can genuinely say my Intuition is based off of logic, reason, algorithms from information I have gathered over the years. And not a need to control the future but to improve the way I or others make decision based on previous information and hopefully truthful information.

An example would be, my old roommate was thinking about buying a car to “build his credit” 🙄. I was simply talking about how awesome my friends hybrid car was because we drove maybe 4 states away on just $30 of gas. I have no idea if that is normal or not. Anyways as he moved towards buying a car I actually told him I think it’s a bad idea. Cars depreciate and it just seemed like a lot of money. To spend on in the city only to drive on the weekends. He didn’t listen and bought an extremely expensive car. Now we lived in front of a bus stop so he had to park his new car a couple of blocks away. The cars mirror got knocked off by someone. We were fighting and I almost felt like he thought it was me. He also would drive drunk and scraped up the whole side of the car and I begged him to stop driving intoxicated. So he didn’t even have the car for a year, fucked it all types of ways up and I think started defaulting on payments which did the opposite of what he wanted. It wasn’t the best decision financially or for his lifestyle. But Logically and intuitively I told him, not the best decision.

I mean that’s an OKAY example. Maybe not the best but it came to mind.

I mean I also use to read tarot cards. And even my intuition was about storytelling. While these instances were maybe more pulled out of the air than say Logical Intuition, they really weren’t because there was an inquire (question) and a tool and it was my job to just interpret the tool.

I have had many tarot readers not read my cards right. But in the moment for the inquirer it’s comforting.

Now more than ever I NEED real answers and solutions as to why I have this entity attached and how to get rid of it. Not just some 5 card spread about my (fake ass) twin flame lame love story.

A natural gift is talent. It’s ability to take emotional cues, it’s innovation, the ability to sooth or inspire others. I think so many of the Occult, New Ager and even some Christians want super powers. Like they want to be the Last AirBender or a Power Ranger. (Don’t get me wrong I want them too, but what are you collaborating with? And do you REALLY have the discernment to KNOW for sure the difference?)

Idk. I personally found a lot of these supernatural feelings, visions, voices, prophecies, experiences have been Demonic Entities. Not a “spiritual awakening” or ascension or gifts. Idk again I am only limited to my perspective of pure constant spiritual torture.

What is my spiritual “gift” seeing demons? Lol like …………. can I return it?

And seeing these demons have kept me from my friends, career, being healthy, my natural gifts, things I enjoy. Possibly the ability to take care of my family or build my own. LIFE! It’s taken over my life……

Maybe it’s just an assumption but I wouldn’t think a “gift” is not suppose to upheave your whole life and leave you in the wilderness to figure shit out yourself. Cut off the possibility of advancing in life because demonic aliens want to be fucking sadistic pedo rapist.

Yea and it started with, “aww I saw a sparkle that means an angel is with me” NOPE! Mine were positive, love and light too at first and that script got FLIPPED! So I don’t trust any of them, even though I can see them.

They want to tell the future, but I think they create the future with suggestions. To be honest. Even as someone who is tortured I can see how they harm or kill someone.

I mean they want to run every thought aspect of my life. Be it smoking, eating, pooping, sleeping, waking up, being false positive or negative thought. A false positive (to me in these situations are fake positivity only to lead up to a negative which is devastating). So an example would be the Demonic Alien voices say something like “you look pretty today……” this would only be to further humiliate me later when I go to the bathroom and look in the mirror they will say “oh never mind you’re ugly”. Now I have no problem looking at my flaws and maybe correcting them in a balanced way. If my eyebrows are looking a little bushy pluck them. But these Demonic Entities are black and white. Good only to be evil. Either or. They need to make you feel special so they can devastate you. There is no balance with them.

This is not a spiritual gift.

False Teachings: Kundalini, False “Awakenings”, Ascension… The New Age 🙄

So this was a comment on a video I was watching. I can attest to the false and misleading teachings.

Again I slipped into New Age trying to find God for me. And trying to figure out why I was having “supernatural” experiences, And just found some wacky stuff. But at the heart of it there was some…… idk truth to the matter but it is only meant to suck you in even deeper.

So while I might not see the “serpent going up my back” I have seen snakes in the “astral” and I have seen these other things placed over the forehead that represents the 3rd eye.

One time I was walking down the street, neck deep in the thick of this experience. And a old school (but young) psychic woman stopped me on the street. She said she had something to tell me. And I went to her apartment. She said I had a “tear in my aura”, 🤯🙄🤦🏻‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️ (okie dokie) she pulled some cards and asked me what do I think the blindfold represents. For some reason I said protection (and I know how to read tarot unfortunately). In that moment the blindfold for me meant protection and keeping us from seeing certain things.

I don’t know if God removed “the veils” from my eyes, but the way the Entities try to cover them is COMPLETELY different than the way I have lived my life over the last 30 summin years. Like I can actually see a black patch in front of my eyes. It’s subtle enough to not completely ruin my physical vision. But still there. This black patch (or attachment) creates visions illusions dreams. And when they remove them when they feel like it, I can see them (be it real astral or an illusion) something is there and or something put something there. So this aspect developed in 2017 a year after hearing the voices. Seeing the entities would scare anyone. Seeing Troll/Demon/ Reptilian, Alien heads Floating around, Praying Mantis, it’s uhhhh not fun. I mean some may think it’s fun but it gets old real quick. Especially once you realize you don’t really have much control over the experience.

I wasn’t even deep into yoga. Just went to two classes with my coworkers to have a “healthy lifestyle”. I’m not gonna lie I enjoyed the strengthening aspect of yoga and stretching areas that normally would not get attention. But honestly in my process of elimination I have no problem letting that go as well.

Like as much as people want to deny it SOMETHING IS UP and A LOT of people are feeling it one way or another.

I mean to me the 3rd Eye is a light receptor. That is my take. Super Natural or not, I don’t think anyone would see the “supernatural realms” if these entities were not in VERY close proximity. Like I saw sparkles when I was younger but that is an attack from a further range by an entity. But if the entity is close by (at least for me personally), you might see black shadows, actual entities, get pain in the body.

Entities as I keep reiterating in this blog , from my observations, are made up of light, light can apparently have consciousness and through their own consciousness they can create illusions with the light that they are. That is the best way I can describe it.

Some want to play with these realms and do you boo, but not me. At best I want to release myself. And that’s been my goal ever since this stuff started.

But it has been interesting putting together some of these concepts together. At least I have SOME understanding of my spiritual oppression.

Entities in the Children’s ER

So I’m with my Godson at the children’s ER because he might have the flu that has been going around.

He was sleeping and I was on my phone bullshitting and maybe an hour into the situation I felt something release from my booty (I have been feeling this weird booty energy release for a while now, pause, it’s not a fart, I have also felt this same release on my upper back/shoulder and it’s been on my right side. So a lot of pain and pressure on the left a lot of releasing on the right). So this happened and I forgot OH YEA IM DEMONICALLY OPPRESSED!

So I scanned the room to see what was up and there were the energy fields of entities on his bed and the empty baby bed in the room.

Once it saw that I saw it it shot into my right eye. But I could still see the energy mass sparkling and floating around at the foot of the bed.

Now while my godson was in the cab to the hospital he was complaining about a headache, like a really bad headache and he had a fever. And for me when the entities connect to my head i can normally get fevers and migraines. Not always together but most of the time. Like right now I have a migraine no fever. But often I do.

So I scanned his skull region to see if there was anything, and I surprisingly I did not see anything. This was prior to going inside the hospital.

So there is nothing attached to his body directly to his upper body. But there seems do be something attached to his lower legs.

Then there are other entities attached to the foot of the bed that were going wild that I saw them. My bed has entities all around them. If you think about it a bed is when we are the most vulnerable so it would make sense that that is their top favorite place. (Bathroom is probably second in my guess, cars 3rd)

So it’s saddens me SO DEEPLY that even innocent children are fair game for these Entities. But if you think about it that is how they indoctrinate us into their sick games. From a young age. We just don’t know it.

🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢

BIG DEEP BREATHS!

Trying not cry about how fucking gross this planet is. 🥺😭🤢🤮

Ascension Symptoms: Flu (New Age lies lol)

So I’m am under the weather. BUT honestly I have been not feeling well this whole time since my attack began in 2016. I’m starting to forget how it feels to feel ….. ok.

I remember one of the New Age lies that was circling around the internet (Facebook) was “ascension flu“. That because you are physically ill you are “shifting energies” some go as far to think they are martyrs for the collective.

This I believe is dangerous misinformation.

“Energy” are Entities. It’s just coded. Energies or Entities are made up of light and are conscious to various degrees. Even “negative energies/entities” are still made up of light. As much as we want to call them dark or because we saw shadow figures….. they all use light!

I have yet to encounter a “good energy/entity” because at the heart of it there is a lie. Be it their actual name, appearance or information they are sharing with an individual.

This is what is dangerous. Even in the most innocent circumstances.

Because these “energy/entities” lie. We are giving them full access to our bodies and minds and calling it “ascension symptoms”. They do not deserve such privilege. And instead of battling them we are playing with them as they deteriorate our spiritual energy and essentially our body which will manifest as “ascension symptom flu” or even worse.

Since I can personally see what most would call energy, but are in fact entities, conscious beings with a face and everything, I can see that most of us are swimming in them. They are everywhere. One little trick I learned from the Targeted Individual community was EMF readers on the phone. So electromagnetic field readers. Most Targeted Individuals who are getting attacked hard physically by what I would say is Entities, but most believe is government satellites to some varying degree, also give off strong EMF readings. Some in the 200s. And that’s usually insane amounts of pain. The body is not suppose to endure more than 50 regularly and even then that’s high.

So since I can see them I would take my EMF reader and test it. And behold usually the spot where I could see them the reading was high. 200+. I was at a park watching my godson and I saw a string of water space “energy/entities” attached to the park bench. So I pulled out my reader and the reading was off the charts. But when I went to an area I didn’t see them or another par of the bench it was not.

So the the point is that these “energies” which are essentially entities (conscious beings), that are made of light, emit their own electromagnetic field (which is not usually that big, but still). That energy/entity effects our body and whatever that entity feels like playing for the day effects our mind. And I stronger feel like their presence in our body breaks down the immune system making us more susceptible to earthly diseases.

These are not toys to be played with.

While I would love to say rebuking them in the name of Jesus has worked for me. I can only say that recognizing the BS has been more helpful. And God gave me the strength and discernment to do so.

Now I am not trying to come down on people for believing whatever. I mean I thought a “Spirit” was my grandpa when I was younger. And who doesn’t want to feel connected to their family members who passed. And I even wondered about aliens and all that stuff. If God made me he could make aliens too no? Most of us wanted or naturally had supernatural experiences. And wanted answers. But it is time to wake up!

These entities are NOT your friend! And if they are acting like it you are paying a price you have no idea about.

By even allow these entities to play, God, Angels, Demons, Starseed Aliens, higher self, twin flame (higher self), relatives that have passed on, gods or goddesses, past life, ANY OF THAT! If we give them the room to play with our Consciousness they will eventually play with our bodies and ultimately our lives, deviating us from our relationship with God , our purpose, and soul of who we are.

You are not here to play these games!!!

I woke up one day recently and I felt this dull brown, quiet and very SAD energy. And I thought I would shake it off at some point but it wasn’t going anywhere and I wasn’t connecting with it as mine for some reason. I was blessed enough to have a great holiday and got to see the people I love and was content. So I actually messaged my friend who is a healer and asked if she had done any work on me, and before she answered back I felt the “energy” leave my body. I told her ops never mind! And she said no she had not done anything.

Now one do you know how much work these entities are doing to just ruin my day? To hold that feeling of sadness for that long to convince me I should be sad is INSANITY. Which is another point.

Y’all playing with shit you can not see. These Entities that you deem as formless energies from the moon cycle or planets aligning, NO BOO BOO, these are whole ecosystems of the “astral” or ethers that they work in. It is in our world operating on its on and with us. And yes you can manipulate or work with this ecosystem which would be called black magic or white magic (light workers).

I am not with it. FUCK ASTRAL WORLD!

Again by playing with these entities we are giving them full access to US.

Ask yourself a question: why do they want to interact with us so badly? So bad they will lie based on your belief system to gain authority.

Y’all really think they are trying to help the planetary evolution? Look at the state of the world! I would strongly disagree. And if you let these entities drive you around and not snap the fuck out of this none sense we ARE DOOMED! You are not ascending anywhere, you are playing games with God know what kind of entity that is harming your body.

That is the real awakening!

Stop playing games with these fucking assholes!

Observations: Eyes Taken in the Astral

An observation that I have noticed is that many times I have had my “eyes taken”.

Often is feels like my eyes will go blurry and then a series of “visions” will come to mind.

For me this is something that the Entities/demons do. They do this especially to twist ideas and distract you or suggest you.

When this first started the Entities kept saying “my eyes are your eyes” and pretended to be someone and something other than the pathetic POS that they are. And then another one would scream “I hope she never has eyes!” They are absolutely insane and I can’t believe is my real life….. 🤷🏻‍♀️

It’s much like when they create dreams. From what I saw in the “astral” if we want to call it that is that they place “black patches” attachments to the eyes and this causes you not to see the actual entities as well. However it also allows them to have control and through these “black energy patches”, for lack of a better word, they also feed visions to us/ me.

When you are working on your “third eye” and focusing on the center of your skull what you are actually doing is blinding yourself to submitting yourself to visions. This visions are created by Entities with etheric light energy. They ARE the light, they use the light to create an illusion. And by you not focusing on what is actually happening in front of your eyes you have submitted to an illusion. If you had a vision and then focused your eyes to what’s going on right in front of you you would see a COMPLETELY different world. It’s not all pretty. It is barren, and full of illusionist trying to get their rocks off.

They are liars. And they assault the mind, body and spirit.

I can’t tell you HOW many people both schiz and not, man or woman, have been sexually assaulted “spiritually” if we want to call it that. I would say Etherically.

Maybe most of them have not had theirs go on for as long as mine. But it has happened there is literally a METOO movement happening in the Ethers.

I know that my opinion will be an unpopular opinion but honestly you are not “activating your third eye” you are blurring your vision with your eyes closed and allowing entities to lie to you RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOUR FACE!!!! In your eyes! Like they can be big or tiny tiny. And yes we have a pineal gland and maybe that has to do with light receptivity. But either way these Entities are full of 💩💩💩💩💩.

I have mentioned in this blog so many times that on MANY occasions I have looked past the illusion (or one of them). On one occasion I saw the image of a woman in my ” third eye” and something told me to look straight ahead and what I saw the woman then began a praying mantis. And soon as the praying mantis saw that I saw it, it jetted out of my field.

Why you scared?

How does the mantis know I am looking at it straight ahead?

Why are they lying to us?

So many questions!

But honestly I do t even want to write about this stuff anymore. But I feel the need to document it for anyone out there or for the next wave of people. Because the deception is REAL and we are looking like FUCKING IDIOTS!

What I am currently trying to do is strengthen my understanding and relationship with God, Jesus and the Holy Spirit. I know I am a sinner. And I can’t not get out of this hell matrix with out Jesus!

The New Age really got me! And I was lead there by the demons that hung around me, I would experience something “super natural” and google it and then some new age site had an explanation. But NO real solution other than “a bright white light around you” 🙄 So you say that the dark is attracted to my light, but then you tell me to rev up my light to repel them? OKie Dokie!! That makes sense! 🤪

Either way, these demons will lead you astray in what ever form! And you will end up in some occult bs with out even knowing. You were groomed since sin, by demons to end up where you are. Where I am sorry. And yet I still have to be accountable for my nativity.

So slowly they will give you these “super natural” experiences ……. grooming you. Making sure your belief is just right. That you are far enough from God to attack! And they will devour. And if your are lucky you will be saved. I have yet to be so lucky. And I am not sure why. But it is something I have to accept in the moment.

These demons what ALL of you. Touching your hands, genitals, I had one kiss me, 🤢 not to mention rape. Like I’m not making this shit up and it’s NOT my mind. I mean there is YouTube video after YouTube video of people saying they have had these experiences. And they DO NOT consider themselves schizophrenics.

Awakening is bullshit, Third eye bullshit, even the “astral” as normally explained …. bullshit, ascension to whatever dimension is bullshit. It is a lie, lie if people who have been lied to and spreading their lie and thinking they are a Guru because they had a DMT trip. Like this is soooo dangerous.

One dude on YouTube was talking about how he has sex in the astral! LOL are you that hard up bro? That you are fucking with astral spiders that are an illusion of some fantasy woman? Get your WHOLE life together! And he thinks he is a Guru of “astral travel”!

Astral travel is bullshit! You are just being given a waking dream by entities. Are being sucked into their ecosystem which is their being which comprised of smaller beings that all make up the worlds in which you think you are traveling in.

They make you feel by attaching to you. I once felt like I was being jerked around in a dream and as I woke up for like maybe 20 mins I still had 2 things attached to my back that were still buzzing. And I literally felt the suction of them releasing from my body.

I’m not going to say I know everything cause I don’t. But I did my research and I surveyed A LOT of people and this shit is BUUUUILLLLL💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩💩!

And we are gladly handing over our soul for apparent ” live and light” and our mission to save Earth! You wanna save earth? You want to “awaken” WAKE UP! Look right in front of you!!! Right in front of you! You are being lied to! But if you want to keep the illusion FINE!!

Shit is scary!! But you don’t want to save the Earth! You want to play fantasy game of “I’m an angel” or “I’m an alien” or ” I was Isis in a past life” simulation game by these matrix entities that is DEMONS! Old fashion ass DEMONS!

WAKE UP! For real this time!!!

Observations: A rumble in the “astral plane”

So this is another observation I wanted to document. This one has been happening for years, but I just never documented it as I wasn’t too sure.

I’m still not sure but I figured I would document it.

So, for years now (maybe 3 out of the 4 years I have been under attack), I have heard this space rumble noise in my field. At first I thought it was from the train (it’s not cause the train is so deep down in the subway you can’t even hear it outside), I thought it was my body because in the beginning it would make my body shiver or convulse. I mean my body is pretty sensitive now to sound, light, feelings etc. I dont think this a good thing but because the entities are attached. I think entity attachment makes your senses more sensitive so they can communicate with you. Like I was so sensitive I felt an earthquake in NYC that no one in my family felt and thought I was making shit up until the news said that there was. I mean even I thought maybe it was a strong “space rumble”, but it didn’t feel the same.

So I really tried to check myself on this aspect of this “space rumble noise”.

I have not noticed it at my friends house or other places I go. I have only noticed it in my families house.

I see entities energy and see them moving through space in what ever form but I have not noticed any voice or entity/energy movement in association with the “space rumble noise”.

I have eliminated other possible facts that would lead me to believe it’s just a house sound.

I tend to hear it the most in my room and in the bathroom, as if something (maybe a larger entity I can’t see or something beyond what I can see) is moving back and forth between these two spaces. I’ve never heard it in my parents room or even the living room. It seems to be something between my room and the bathroom (and maybe the kitchen a few times 🤷🏻‍♀️).

Again I’m not sure exactly what it is and I have no solid proof. My assumption is that it may be the entity that is projecting the smaller entity (worker bees) that the attach to me. As I said before in other posts, from what I have seen “astral” entities are like fractals. The can unfold/project themselves as many or as one. Down to the smallest aspect like a actual parasite (worm/snake) looking one. Otherwise the snake or worm would be used to say create the outline of their eyes (something I have seen).

With light they can look like anything to us. Or they can choose to hide in the shadows…. which would look like the blackest black to us in our minds eye. They have even used this blackest black to cover my eyes so I didn’t see them in full. But take it off to create dreams made out of whatever light they have left (my assumption that is why they are bothering me, but could be a new age lie).

So a whole entity is comprised of MANY larger, medium and small or even microscopic (which can go into your eyes to create visions) entities that can unfold itself. They are in constant communication (hive mind) and work together in some sort of self preserving ecosystem.

Again I have not been able to really pin point the rumble. I think asked my twin sister one time if she could hear it and she could, but my mom did not.

I took pictures of my sister while she was asleep and saw the same entities on my sister that I saw on me. I did not see the same on my mother. Which was interesting. My sister had a stroke, around the same time I was attacked (or became “schizophrenic”) but my sister hasn’t manifested any signs of schiz Thank God! That on top of multiple disabilities would fucking suck!

I believe the Entities caused my sisters stroke. But I can’t prove that. Other than their “foretelling the future” which i believe they create. I know they create pain and heart palpitations in my body. What is to say they wouldn’t hurt someone else who is less healthy.

I fucking hate them. Pieces of shit! Really.

I swear they better be glad I can’t touch them!

So this rumble makes me think there is another level to this bullshit that I can’t see right now. I honestly don’t care for this experience anymore I just want it gone but I just document here. It’s good for me to go back over time and see if there is any progression in my situation.

I try to maintain a balanced view of the situation an weed out anything that is not a reoccurring part of my experience.

I also hope to help anyone else who is experiencing this bullshit. I never asked for this and I have honestly tried to be the best human I could be. But apparently that doesn’t keep you from experiences like this.

But even that whole “they are attracted to your light” thing is probably a new age lie. Like I have spoken to christians and occultist and new agers….. hinduist….. conspiracy theorist and atheist alike who experience this bullshit. They just all have their own theory or belief. But the underlying commonality is that IT IS happening.

Anyway I’m over it!

Twin Flame: False Ascension Matrix Testimony

I resonated with 90% of her story. I think the only difference between she and I, is that I gave up the Twin Flame™ story.

They story was NOT healthy for me nor was it believable AND the “dark entities” and or “false light beings” were taking to the MAX!

Like damn!

And when I finally let go of the Twin Flame story that is when things went south. Like REALLY bad. And honestly I think it is because they could not play me anymore. I declared that I am not a twin flame and I made sure to work on making sure that in my mind it was not true for me even with the Entity voices would try to take over my mind to convince me, or show me images and dreams of my ex constantly as if it meant something. I had to literally let the thought roll by with out attaching to it.

I can’t say if there are real twin flames or not. BUT I can tell you that these Entities are playing the 💩 out of us.

And there seems to be a profile to them. Liars being the most predominant.

And if they are not playing the “divine feminine” with twin flame bull💩 they are attacking the men with Targeted Individual and or Gang Stalking. (Not to say there aren’t any other genders in each it’s just that one tends to be more dominated by one than the other)

That is the level I am right now. And I haven’t been able to move past the idea that something is definitely lying to us and manipulating our emotions and trying to ruin our lives. For what purpose I honestly don’t know. People will say to “suck our negative energy” or “sexual energy” which is known as looshing, but it is not really adding up with what I see or experience in the astral.

I definitely see these beings with these straws or tubes that they use to connect to any part of the body. But whether or not that is directly in relation to sucking my negative or sexual energy (which they create through torturing me physically or mentally) like it’s a Starbucks Carmel macchiato frappe….. idk.

It is just like, twin flame is a game (level), so is Targeted Individual just another. There is no hierarchy. Just beliefs and layers of illusion to peel back and let go of. Even I’m on a layer, which I feel stuck on with thinking this some demonic entity conspiracy hoax.

Like all these demonic aliens Entities had a conference on how they were going to dupe us and fuck our whole shit up.

And that is what I see. But I often wonder if that is an illusion as well. Whatever is going on I don’t think they would give themselves up so easily, so there has to be another level to this than what I am experiencing. So I am right there with everyone trying to unlearn any bullshit that this experience is trying to convince me of.

It’s funny because these Entities tried to force me into a really twisted idea of religion and God. I have been trying to understand the Bible as best I can to see how that resonates with this experience.

Through out this even with in my mixed emotions and being mad at God and feeling abandon I tried to maintain a faith in God and in Good. Even though I can not see or experience that now. I need to have faith in Good and in God. Again I’m just not sure if God works the way that most of some Christians teaches it. There is a LOT of prophets and a LOT of prosperity gospel and idk I’m not sure if it’s fully resonating with me. Again I never directly asked for ANYTHING from God other than to get rid of these entities and this experience. I was just kind of floating through life and being thankful for what I had, even when things sucked I tried to get the lesson out of it. But this experience……. is out of control.

I’ve tried to maintain a celibate life, learning the word, maintains faith. But when a pastor says to listen to the Holy Ghost I’m like 😳🤔😕😐😶. Cause this chick over here can’t trust anything after the level of abuse and manipulation I have received from the entity voices. I told my mom I am gonna need ID like a burning bush or something to believe it’s God or even the Holy Spirit at this point.

I feel dumb for the most part. A chunk of my life is gone to this seemingly pointless experience. And that is something I can never get back. Time.

Either way I made this long enough.

Reality Meltdown? 🤷🏻‍♀️

So I am seeing the Entities energy WAY more clearly!

Like I can see how they surround my room. I can see how physical 3D space matters. So like there is a fan in my room and one like hanging over there. I see how they curve or attach to the divider screens in my room. I see how they are connecting around in my room.

So I am seeing them and in this space and it baffles me that others don’t see them, I’m trying to understand. I mean if you don’t know what to look for then I guess yea you just walk around in space not caring about it. But I mean I see them move all the time. And black or white sparkles (now, very few colors). I know they can create illusions with light. I know they wear some sort of cover up.

I’m just wondering how much longer do I have to wait on God and much further will I be abused by these Entities? Like am I going to have a COMPLETE reality melt down? Like just neck deep in the “hallucinations” I’m practically living in it now. They have merged into my world, but I have not into theirs. And be honest I’m really good on that shit. I want to be left the fuck alone. I’m not falling for any of this bullshit with them.

Like after last night being woken up and seeing that shit (previous post) and now just like seeing these misty entities all in my face and shit like I’m fucking over it.

I’m trying to keep my shit together.

Try to actually get my shit together and do something with my life other then watch these fucking rapist demons play in my head and with my body.

Like am I just going to be sitting in THEIR world one day?

Are they waiting for me to preserver to rock the shit out of my world……..AGAIN?

Like I am really done with this lame ass astral game. Seriously.

Like I don’t even know why they even put this etheric black patches over my eyes. Why? It has to be my physical eyes and not my one “third eye” because I saw them do it twice. So I don’t know if I just have good eye sight……or something with my brain allows me to see light differently or different light spectrums. But they are fucking covering/attaching to my eyes. And playing games with that shit.

i am OVER this bullshit.

December Intensified

So tonight I was looking at a gift for my friend. For whatever reason the Entities made me sleepy. I didn’t fight it. I pick my battles, sleep is not one of them.

So I woke up to a voice saying “he got hit by a car”, I assumed this was my ex (soul mate not false twin flame) because before we broke up he got hit by a car and I took care of everything. That’s why I was so shocked that he wanted to see other people (be polyamorous) all of a sudden because I played that wifey roll HARD. Anyway so I was awakened by that comment and only assume that it was about my ex but I can’t say for sure.

Then I was looking into the darkness with my eyes closed and I could see these Entities floating and spinning around. And one like SHOT out of my direction like it didn’t want to be seen or wasn’t suppose to be there. And that one almost looked like it swam off. Then I saw another one close to me. I could see their features more ….. umm a bit more 3D as opposed to a flat image I normally see. And then one of them took their straw thing and blew some black hairball mass (sorry best I can describe it) into my eyes to cover up seeing them. I was maybe 10% out of my cool only cause I could see them REALLY clear and bright. Might of been about 3 of them for sure. Maybe more not sure.

This week has been intense. Just more sparkles, migraines again, more seeing the watery clear misty energy around me.

Like this shit is hella fishy and something is not adding up.

I mean they purposefully woke me up right? So why would they make it seem like I caught them doing something to me (which was probably making a pointless Dream)? But I mean if you know you are going to wake me up out of my sleep then I would assume that you would handle your business of covering your tracks if you don’t want to be seen.

Be honest I don’t care either way. But I’m not playing this bullshit game. I’m just logging it here for me.

So they put me to sleep, only to wake me up maybe an hour or so later, to act like they accidentally revealed themselves to me and do their little blow straw thing at me at my actual eyes or third eye to hide themselves?

Shit ain’t adding up!

AND I have seen many different types of Entities so far but all of these ones today seemed the same. So I wonder if they are just wearing costumes. Again, why would they completely reveal themselves to me? It’s just one lie after the other after the other why wouldn’t their appearance not be a lie too? One thing that seems to be consistent is that these Entities have a ring around them. This ring I almost feels like it may cloak half their body or up to their head and helps them move around. Idk I could be wrong. But that’s what it looked like.

I can’t believe I can’t find anyone I can really bounce this shit off of. I listen to a lot of different people who actually talks about this stuff. But again they only have part so far. Or I would have to pay money to have a convo with them about this. Or our theories don’t align at some point. Which is fine. But I mean idk.

Heeeeeelp!!! Lol

Cho Cho Train frequency energy

At my house and my best friends house I keep hearing something like a cho cho train.

There are no railroads near my house or hers.

Actually at her house I keep hearing like a low or far away sounding amber alert / flash flood warning.

So I feel like it has to be energy/Entity and or frequency.

I can kind of feel it in my feet if I stay still enough.

But I’m not sure what this energy is or why. It’s bee for the past two weeks what seems randomly.

Just making a note.