Death Treats…..😩

So I was trying to sleep. And of course they went on as business as usual with buzzing, trembling my body, hard to describe the sensation but almost like my “spirit” is being stretched or yanked. Or maybe its their energy being yanked. Idk. 

Either way kept jolting me awake a few times. Lol this is why Schizo’s get irritated probably. 

But Archon homie tried to do this whole play like “I’m sorry, you want rose colored”,  I’m like huh? I guess basically rose colored glasses to look away from what they are doing to me and play. 

So now it made it seem like its “boss” came in and said “I know you are sorry!” Then the “boss” said in a deep tone “Ms. (My last name) your nwhole family is going to get shot!” Because of my previous posts honing in on Archons as the main cause of my schizophrenic experience. 

Now I am use to these tactics to scare me. I’ve seen and heard worse. But I’m REALLY getting tired of this shit. I was just trying to sleep.

Now that I’ve settled on it being “Archon’s”, they want to take another opportunity to scare me and make a whole elaborate play so it can feel like a powerful cosmic dot, when I don’t give a fuck. 

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ARCHONS 🌚 β€˜interdimensional entities’ the negative controllers of humankind


http://ufosightingshotspot.blogspot.com/2013/03/archons-interdimensional-entities.html?m=1

So I think I have settled on the fact that what I see, hear and feel are archon’s. It took me a while to actually see them “3d”.

This sucks cause now I’m a crazy archon “conspiracy theorist”. But this is what I legit see and they seem to fit the description. 

Why I see one stealth in my bathroom and why they are attacking me, or how to liget get rid of them out of my home and life? I don’t know.

I’m not crazy, I hate conspiracy theories or actually believing them, and this kinda makes it more difficult on me in the sense now that I KNOW these are archon’s I have to figure out a way to make them leave.

Sooooooooooo i have a lot of data on them and their nature. As I said prior I gave them the opportunity to co-exist with me and do good in the world (gotta a least try). They refuse and would rather zapp me of alk my energy making it difficult to be active and call me a loser all day. So. We aren’t, can’t, won’t, be on the same team or friends. 

Fuck their racist, homophobic, classiest, religious lookist, sexist, xenophobic, pedophile jokes!!!

God why?! Now I’m a conspiracy theorist damned to be in the dark edges of the internet because its just too real!

GREAT! Now I’m basically illegitimate click bait. 😩

Spiritual Abuse πŸ”ͺπŸ”«πŸ’£

There is no reason to be spiritually attacked there is no excuse. That’s like a rapist saying she asked for it because wore a short skirt. Fuck THAT!

Victims of spiritual/astral abuse will blame themselves. They will say, “I deserve this because I lied when I was 12 years old” or something just as ridiculous. We seek peace and that’s the easiest route than grabbing at air. But we seek NOW. Dwelling on the pasts on shortens our time in becoming the person we wish to be the best versions of ourselves. 

Our capitalist system says “you are not enough!” , so by this product and subscribe to this lifestyle. Spirituality /religion says you are not enough, you didn’t pray enough, you did something bad, some past life bullshit generational curse, that you didn’t meditate enough, that you didn’t eat organic enough. In relationships, we feel like we aren’t pretty enough, or doing enough or have enough money or enough love or trust. 

So it is NO WONDER these astral parasites …. Spiritual abusers go on to say YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH. You’re ugly, fat, skinny, stupid, crazy, no body likes you, you have no friends, kill yourself, no money, you are not good at what you do, you don’t know what you are doing, you need our guidance, unlovable, unworthy, you’re an addict, you will never understand, you don’t have knowledge. 

You will never be enough, when you are! 

I am a complete being. I have my own “dark” and own “light”. I grow as needed. Forced “darkness” or this bullshit “dark nigbt of the soul”, is abused pushed by astral parasites. Saying it’s because you did this or that, that YOU weren’t enough is excusing this program and act of spiritual violence. Finding peace and “learning from” the abuse is the gift we give ourselves to cope and to heal. We weave stories of some past life karma, a curse, blame ourselves. “This happened to me because…………….” 

Outside of that we are excusing unseen and intangible abuse. By subscribing to this idea that pain is our greatest teacher, is superficial and more than likely you never been in a full blown psychic attack.
You are saying our current system, all system are fine as is and should operate and function with no change.

This whole you “change your reality” is bullshit. You know how hard I’ve fought?!? All this law of attraction, most people want car, money love. I want the change, justice, peace, safety for all people! 

NOTE: The demon suggested pain and my smoking cigs (cause you devils advocate). Now do I know smoking is bad? Yes. Do I wish to change that? YES. Do I think I should be raped everyday by some demon for going on two years? NO.
Whatever. But I’m the crazy one.

Fuck this demon! 

Crazy Talk: Jelly Monster πŸ‘»πŸ’”

So I can see the effects of the demon, I can feel them, hear them, but I can’t see the actual demon that’s conducting it. 

I believe that many healer are able to remove the effects but not the actual entity. Maybe some can. But none of the ones I went to. 

So, I see this jelly monster (looks like a clear slimmer) that moves around me. I state previously in my blog that, I don’t think this is the entity but the “energy” it sends kinda like and extension of sorts it copies. Its not easy to see but I see it. I think its the same “energy” that screams repeatedly, mimics other peoples voices and music, repeats what I say, the gives me tremors and that can copy cat emotions like anxienty or headache, intense tension, feeling ill, being high. Prolly other things too like images/vision. Almost like AI intelligence toy, but its not the main and I feel like its being controlled. 

Today I was wondering HOW did the entity pull off things like knowing when my ex (false/ twin flame) was going to call, or what song he was going to send me, when the cat took my chair and I wasn’t in the room. And a few other “prediction” or plain old’ nosiness. 

Either way. My assumption is that this jelly monster was being nosey with my ex or attached to my ex. Something maybe like that. And that’s how it copied his voice and knew info. Some people call it “attachment cords” this one looks like a clear jelly vibrating blob thing that moves around at medium speed in and out of vision some times sparkles if its close by like on my head. But then I’m like how the fuck did the jelly monster get to the edge of Brooklyn? Like it legit floated 20 miles?

πŸ’©πŸ‡πŸŠπŸš†πŸš„πŸš…β“‚πŸšˆπŸš•πŸš˜πŸšœπŸš βœˆβ›΅πŸš€πŸšβ‰

I hope my ex wasn’t harmed in any way. In the beginning I did so many “cord cutting meditations” because I just wanted whatever this was gone. I blamed my ex, i did. But I kept away from him so this demon wouldn’t make another game out of it. I’m pretty sure he is OK and doing fine. But if he went through a fraction what I went/ going through….. I am so sorry, even though none of this was my fault. I never sent ANYTHING to him in any way. Only trying to get through my own heart ache to move on.

Either way. That’s my theory of the jelly monster I have been seeing floating around the house or stuck in the bathroom. 

Crazy shit right? πŸ™

God……….  Why did I have to get the crazy one? 

I feel like I need a blunt and I don’t even like smoking. 🌴

You Are Welcome πŸ™

I was practicing a Chi breathing technique on YouTube that a friend sent to me.

I noticed some blocks and add ons but whatever I always notice.

Either way, it talked about creating chi and then bringing it back into the body.

I rememered a moment when this all first started happening and my chest extending out past my shoulders felt like I was opened up. That’s when I first started to feel like I was dying.

I didn’t feel much in my center now, just this tender heart. I figured the entity took all my chi, that’s why all I can do right now is sleep, eat cookies and cry about the world.

The guy talking in the video said that we are “the most powerful free energy devices on the planet”.

So I immediately told the Entity, “you are welcome….” And I meant it. I wasn’t being sarcastic as usual. It was a gift.

I figured that I gave (well it took) my energy to this Entity. I just don’t know how to reve my chi back up yet……

…… Wonder if instead of scaring the shit out of me, disrespecting me, violating, if other entity beings whatever where to be upfront? Maybe we could live peacefully. 

Entity would be like, “Yo I really need this chi, I will make it quick.”

They won’t and… Maybe can’t tell me who or what they are. Maybe I’m too peace loving and just feel like if we just put the truth out there it would easier for all of us and work something out. 

Who knows, maybe I would be like “sure homie, you can have some of this chi love!” And i would just go wipe some more up later.

I can give with out receiving. But I don’t know I just need a bit of honesty.

Who knows maybe chi doesn’t even exists. Maybe I am pulling this out of my ass. Maybe they don’t need all this brain electric goodness or this golden chi.

All I know is, there has to be a better way.

πŸŒΏπŸŒΉπŸ‘€πŸ‘½πŸ™βœŒπŸŒΉπŸŒΏ

Crazy Talks: What I See πŸ‘€

Just jotting down some notes.

I don’t see this on anyone else but myself.

There are two very distinct things I see other than the visions. I see the these circle dots that can divide into multipuls. And I see this vibrating heat wave looking thing that moves in and out of me. Think like a clear slimmer from ghost busters. 

So I was commenting on a post to a lady that says she can remove implants and the slimmer thing shot out of my stomach and my stomach/ back area vibrated trembled and I could see it moving around outside of me. 

Noe occasionally I during the day will get headaches or I will feel the pressure on my head and I will hear almost like a distant train tremble vibration. I think this vibrating clear thing is the pressure I feel on my head, the anxiety, its like its the ….. Emotion and sensation maker. I don’t know if it is a separate entity or controlled. My guess it is controlled. 

Now the circle dot thing seems to be the visions/ dreams/ hallucinations/ Logo maker. But I’m not sure to what extent it morphs and uses light. If I pinch the corners of my eyes I see a circle of light in each corner. Not sure if this is bad or good. But I’m sure it plays its part. I have literally seen visions (waking dreams) fade away into almost a logo (a simple none color emoji vision), I have also seems dreams fade as well. 

So I see this dot thing that was never there before as the cause of the visions. And this energy slimmer thing as the cause of the sensations I feel. 
After it jumped out of my stomach it went for GUESS WHERE you guys??!?? My VAGINA! Of course! My vagina! I felt it go there after it shot out.

I’m really over this Scooby doo mystery. Seriously. 

Mandala Effect and Targeted Individuals

Just some thoughts.

Mandala Effect I wonder if the mandala effect has to do with “targeted individuals”. I mean I wrote it off as just people being misinformed. I mean our memories aren’t always the best. But there is also our “minds eye” or “third eyes” or “imagination” so when we are asked a question we access it in some way. So I wonder if those who believe something to be one way and not the other are under “mind control” as “targeted individuals”. Just a theory.

Gang Stalking. From what I read many people believe they are being stalked or followes by a group or organization. And while this may be true as a “target individual”, one I doubt they would make themselves so obvious. And two its a part of the “paranoid schizophrenia” “play”. In my own experience the VOICE  or Entity, whatever you want to call it…. Would make me believe it was my ex and his friends doing this to me. Then it moved to my place of work and it was my coworkers. Then moved to my home and almost everyone in NYC had something to say about me. Talk about gang stalking, how about about a whole borough “bullying” you? It was/ is intense to say the least and makes it difficult to go outside and engage the world like I use to. Once I realized this is impossible… For EVERYONE in NYC to be talking about little old me things changed. Once I realized it is impossible for my ex and his friend (who lived on the other side of the country) to psychic telepathic access to me to bully me. Things changed. Once I realized that THE VOICE(s) were talking too fast to be two different people things changed. So while it still happens some times…. I don’t believe it. It is just ONE Entity simulating this nasty ass shit.

As I said before, like I wonder if this how people get hurt or go crazy and hurt people thinking they are doing this shit to them, or suicide cause they are lost in some sick simulation overlay. 

Types of voices. You may notice both a pitch or frequency accompanied by a white static noise. Try ear plugs and touching certain parts of your body like ears or neck … Or affected areas or closing your body in yoga positions. The tones may change. But I pray that you not hear them if you are uncertain. The types of voices I noticed are as followed.

Main Voice: I’m not sure if some people are even able to get there. But once you get past the paranoia or characters or actual people that IT is hiding behind … You may find one voice. I’m not sure how that may play out for individuals because each have a different experience. But this is in relation to “targeted individuals” and the feeling of “gang stalking”. My particular Voice or Entity attachment…. Is intelligent, manipulative, obsessive, lies, I could say creative, but for this experience is absurdly abusive and inhumanly psychotic. May present itself as an archetype of authority, God, Jesus, Goddesses, Buddha, Ex partners, Bosses, Satan, Aliens, Angels, Parents, etc so that you feel powerless. Which in that moment may very well feel true. This “Main Voice Entity”, orchestrates most of the experience. The main voice may very well emulate YOU. So while its orchestrating it is suggesting you (light images, memories, or actual “subconscious thought”) how to respond or placing false feelings.

The Scream: This one often sounds like a distant scream that repeats over and over. Usually negative. May be “fuck you” or “bullshit” or “you’re crazy” “you’re ugly” or something that means something to you. Tends to rhyme. At one point I called it Rumpelstiltskin. But repeats it over and over again. This one also tends to be melodic. So you may hear music like sounds off of running water or other ambient sounds like a fan or humming of a car. 

Voice(s) / Gang Stalking: So this one is difficult. One, being paranoid is natural in natural situation. Walking down a dark ally sure. Stepping out of your house to get some almond milk in broad daylight…. Not so much. The Voice Entity is an opportunitist and will exploit any situation. So if you think your Boss passed you up for a promotion it is going to maybe you felt down or depressed … angry…. This Entity Voice will make you go postal… Hopefully not literally.

So my theory is that The ONE Voice Entity controls the “many”. The one that sings, the one that screams in the distance, the one that says your name randomly, the one that make you think people in your life are out to get you (but hey who knows), the one that makes you think your being gang stalked, that the TVor radio is talking to you, talking to dead relativites or people far away, The one that makes you think you heard someone say some crazy shit and they didnt, the one that makes you think you are taking to goddesses or aliens. 

I can’t say what this…. Exactly… But that is what I have realized for myself. It doesn’t make it any less debilitating.

This post is just on voices I could go on about the whole experience. But it rarely ever makes any sense. So as with “targeted individuals” while I can relate with the experience and can see it relate with other experiences as well (spiritual awakening “purging” “dark night of the soul” or Kundalini symptoms and “surrendering”ect) there is always that one piece missing. 

Who, How, and Why?

It’s Hot!

Since this Entity has decided to attack have never been so use to …… Thinking so loud. I am aware that even before I would speak to this Entity in my mind….. That there is a thought before that…. And maybe even one before that.. That sparks maybe what is known as thought.

So for instance …. I was thinking about (non mental verbal) how humid it is and traveling to go see a friend…. A vision/ image of pores of flesh flashed in my mind so lightly quickly. Then the Entity yells out “It’s HOT!”. I, trying to access my original thought said, “No I meant humid”…. A moment after I asked the Entity, “Why do you do that?” At which the Entity replied, “To make you go CRAZY!”. I just sat there in my first moments of waking up wondering……. why?

I went to go get some coffee and the Entity proceeded to go off about how it doesn’t care about me…. And just the usual negative bla bla. Trying to control my thinking as per the usual.

And I still wonder why? Still? I mean I realized most of the tricks…. So why are we still doing this? 

DefeminizationΒ 

So I realized I guess today …. Tonight…. That this entity defeminized me through a mixture of ways. 

  1. I Am Isis
  2. Child abuse
  3. Cutting my hair
  4. Gaining weight from stress
  5. Numbing

My spiritual naivity made it easy to suck me into its game…. By first testing super imposing (audio) over what other people said. Because I wouldn’t respond to it…. That made it easy to slip into the idea of Telepathy because I was too scared to say “Hey, I feel like I’m hearing you saying this in your mind”. That is why it needed to keep me away from my Ex.

It TOLD/forced me to call myself Isis (the divine mother archetype) so that it could lure me into the storyline (through separation from my ex twin flame) and then “giving it away” to a much prettier woman. Or insinuating i was becoming Osiris. It started telling me I didn’t know how to act like a lady. Forcing me to sit up straight, and cross my legs through “energy”. Often I felt choked, harnessed or collarded into sitting up straighter than normal. But I wasn’t opposed to having good posture….. But being controlled. 

I had always identified as a tomboy or two spirited as I had a hard time relating to societies social standards for women. It was my way of finding comfort by rejecting it. I was OK with that. But I soon understood I did not totally understand what it was to BE a man really. And while I used the tomboy/ two spirited identy as a crutch towards understanding I can be female…. Feminine and still not fit the mold. I slowly found my own brand of feminity that I was comfortable with and appreciated. Not because society or a partner or some entity forced me. But because I just was.

This included my the notion to be a mother. I never thought about having children because I was in a Queer relationship and I have PCOS (which can make it difficult to conceive). So it just was never on my agenda. After my best friend gave birth (to my godson), of course it came to mind. I mean the CHEEKS…. I am a sucker for pudgy droopy baby cheeks. And this was my first time feeling love and care for a child. I had to take care of him as a new born because my best friend was in the hospital for a month from heart failure and the father bailed after she found out he was trying to find dates while she was in the hospital. This was the first time I ever care for and fell in love with a baby. But my main priority is that he had a mother and and that she was good… She is one of my closest friends. So she soon got better and and did her mom thing (she was staying with me through the pregnancy because she had to quit her job close to the due date) and I tried to help out since the father bailed. Soon after my lease was up and we had to go our separate ways. But I we always hung out like every other weekend …. And I would watch my Godson if she was short on cash for a daycare. And just due normal aunty duties like birthdays and Xmas gifts. I was content with that.

I can’t say that having one of my own didn’t cross my mind. I loved him and even though he was rambunctious it wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be but I also understood that the day to day mother routine can get the best of you. I know my BFF wanted to pull he hair out sometimes as a single mother which is why I would offer her a day off. 

I also worked with youth at an after school internship and found value in that. Just making learning fun. But when this entity attacked …. I could no longer engage in my work and mission as well as with my Godson (or best friend because I don’t think she will understand and I don’t want her to) whom I miss so much. I miss them both. And I miss the community in worked with (entity forced me to quit saying to sign my resignation all day and acting like my boss). And at least trying to make the world better…. Even if it is one life… Or for a moment… Or one place.

Once this entity attacked in 2016 it forced me to cut of my hair …. By telling me to …. Because it said I was going to have cancer anyway. So I buzz cut it…. Cause I just wanted it to stop and go away. Then it went on and would say I looked like a man…. Or ugly or a dyke, or I look like a child molestor now. And so forth every fowl name you can think of. I didn’t want to look in the mirror NOT because I thought of myself as ugly but because I was tired of hearing this entity say all these crazy things as I looked at my reflection.

Some one who wanted nothing more than the safety and celebration of generations…. I just don’t see how this happened. Being called a child molestor ALL DAY and working with youth does not mix well. And I quit my job hoping the nightmare with this entity would stop. The entity first said I was enduring this to become a mother with my ex twin flame. I rejected it. I was like its fine…. I won’t be a mother I guess you can stop this child molestation game. Quitting my job and rejecting this (false) “offer”. Didn’t help it go away.

It continued…. And still says “you will never be a mother” and compares my taking care of my twin sister who had a stroke to motherhood saying “still doesn’t make you a mother”. I in no way thought that taking care of my sister makes me a mother. I just pulled on all of my strength… To assist through my own difficult time and to deal with the emotions of seeing my sister unable to take care of herself. I also had to learn to step back as she is an adult as well and hates to be told what to do (I guess we are the same in that regard). 

After quitting my job I had to force myself out of the love spell this entity put over me for my ex (twin flame). The entity showed me images of him with other women, mimicked his voice as he degraded me all day. I soon came to realize that it wasn’t my ex …. And still till this day the entity tries to convince me it is my ex or for the reconciliation between my ex and I that it tortures me all day.

I no longer felt like myself, looked like myself. I didn’t feel pretty not the outside but the inside. Getting dressed up for a date took all of my energy. I didn’t enjoy the things that made me me. I ate too much to cope. Smoked to much to “calm down”. My once bleeding heart became numb because I could no longer allow my emotions or mind to be manipulated by this entity. And I’m still looking for the logic here.

My own brand of femininity and self acceptance was compromised. Destroyed. 

And I only hope ……… I can heal yet again. 

Surrendering?!?!!!

What the fuck y’all surrendering to? You don’t know what or who…. The fuck are y’all doing? 

Everyone is just like “surrender to the process” and all this shit and why? Because fighting harder? Resistance is futile? People out here getting exploited and played….. Not only in the material world…. But mentally and spiritually… 

My volume was just put on blast….

Fuck that.

Its like you can’t save everyone cause most of us are in lala land…  And there is nothing g wrong with lala land (ie. Being “asleep”) but there is something wrong with the fact you can sleep in fucking peace.

As I said I don’t know WHAT exactly is going on but I ain’t with this fucking program. Shit sucks on top of sucking. If I actually surrendered to this thing I would be dead OR WORSE an actual predator. 

If you ain’t enjoying your rest …. Then you might as well wake the fuck up.

People really need to question the information they are being giving. Higher power who?!? You know how many times you are lied to in a day? Why would a sentient being be any less the same? This mofo said he was God, Osiris, and Fat Albert …. That is one hell of a sequence of incarnation or its bullshit…  I’m going for the latter.

Y’all be careful out here cause they will go after everything you love and cherish just for shit and giggles and say it was your choice…. And your fault.