Super Power β˜ΊπŸ”«

Sooooooo….. I was waking up this morning … Slowly but waking up. I did my Benadryl/Zquil cocktail the day before so I could get a solid 6+ hours of sleep.

So I was in and out of sleep. But generally was OK. So I woke up, and the Entity once again showed me an image of child abuse. There was no reasoning. It wasn’t punishing, it wasn’t related to my dreams, just child abuse for the sake of child abuse …. Because its funny to this Entity.

Not the way I wanted to wake up. 

So basically this Entities super power is being a pedophile?!? 

That was originally how it got me to almost kill myself twice. But I guess it wanted to just flash another vision of child abuse for old times sake.

I’m really getting sick of this shit, and having to “be strong”. There is nothing strong about enduring this. 

While I have finally figured out this was a tactic used by this debased souless Entity demon thing. That doesn’t make any easier, in a way I pretend and act as though it doesn’t bother me in hopes that staying strong and not shedding a tear this thing will go away. But….  I don’t know if it ever will.

Just trying to find peace. 

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Peace + Love βœŒβ€

I have been “meditating” on if peace is of a “higher” frequency than love. 

Love is action, when we have Peace or come from a place of peace love is clear. 

If we are not at peace all love becomes unclear. It is tainted with over thoughts. It becomes lust or possession…. Distrust.

I have a bias as I seek peace first.  The thoughts/ voice/ entity cloud my own thoughts or lack there of. And so peace and coming from a clear space, takes extra exhausting work to not fall prey or get caught up in the “emotional” congestion of negative thinking.

Love is what you do. That is why the idea of unconditional love comes from. If we are at peace, then love comes naturally and with out conditions. You do it because it is your impulse. When love is the second impulse it is something to be obtained. A goal …….. a possession.

On the other hand unconditional love does not mean that you constantly take someone’s shit. Because in that moment you are no longer choosing peace. Then we rationalize all of our steps towards love and eventually back to peace. 

It is not easy to mitigate between, “fear and love” and the war in which is causes. We live in this world of black and white, duality that you only have this one choice between these two options. So when the war between love and fear begins choose peace.

I choose peace first.

Fact Checking

I have always been more of an intuitive learner. Which means I do not blindly accept the information given to me, question intuitively, and if interested or even possible do a simple Google search to come to a conclusion. 

There are so many lies in this world it a wonder we have any wits about us. Even more so, we are all mostly linked to the internet via our phones or computers and we scroll through multiple inputs of information with in minutes.

People are worried about false news but not these “inspirational” or political quote memes. 

A few friends posted alleged Albert Einstein quotes and intuitively I did not feel these were quotes from our man Albert.

I mean they are poignant qoutes, but why attached them to someone it did not come from. If its paraphrasing it may be an opinion but just say that. More or less I feel this is more about “click baiting” or receiving more likes and share via social media. 

Its like yea you now carry this supposed quote of Einstein’s in your mind and its a lie. It wasn’t meant for you to really have greater understanding of Albert’s work or any intelligence. But more to feed the ego of likes and shares on social media. 

They have done this Einstein, Rumi, Buddah and I sure many other inspirational and intelligent minds. Just attribute some random quote to pawn off as fact. 

Do you think either of them would want that? Do you think either would want you to blindly believe?

Its like everything in this world is a lie. Its sad. Down to our own minds. It’s really sad.

Then we wonder how we have mass hysteria with phenomenons such as the “Mandela Effect”, media/ social media using lame tactics to allow our ignorance to steep to knee lows. The psychology of social media in an age where everyone has access. I’m not gonna go to deep into that just yet. But our beliefs and psychology can and have clearly been tampered with. 

Some people get upset and see it as me bing arrogant or pompous, but really just digging for the truth, and maybe hopefully learning something along the way, and sharing for our greater knowledge. Your choice in the end. 
So NO Buddha didn’t say that shit. 

“JIM CARREY “CRAZY” BEHAVIOR EXPLAINED!!

Dont get me wrong, i love a good “woke” piece. The thing that I guess I don’t understand is this particular blogger says that many of the teachers such as Jesus knew that they were”not the things they precieve”, and yet the blogger goes on to talk about the nothingness. 

But there is also an assertion of self as I AM. Many have asserted. …  How does this assertion relate to the nothingness that we are?

Good video. But it looses me a bit in the end. As much as the “nothingness” is get to ponder, there is still a material world. Just because we MAY be nothingness in a material world do we “absolve” ourselves of responsibility? 

I would say NO, and considering the state of the world, we are in a crisis. But because it is overwhelming, because true peace is just outside of our grasp. We can sit here and contemplate the nothingness of what we may or may not be.

The Insanity

So now, I don’t know if its because I am no longer of any use. 

Now in sleep or possession the Entity makes less sense. Tried to convince me the blue and orange were my “only chakras” of sorts.

I also agreed to some extent in these moments I have no choice but to agree. It feels more like mind control. Being forced to agree. Like I had no choice when the Entity forced me to believe it was God. 

If I was observing I wouldn’t be asked questions. There is no opinion either way.

There is no reasoning, nothing makes sense. Its a strange state to be in. Its like conceptual “word salad”. I don’t understand the point of it either other than maybe feel powerful.

I feel like a dead body being played with. 

Separating Emotions 😩

I’m angry. This shit sucks. I’m tired of the nasty negative thoughts. I’m over it. Its pointless and useless. 

Now the Entity even taunt me and say “you’re so pretty”. Just to be sarcastic.

So I find my self angry. Keeping myself in check not to fall for another manipulative mind game. I have constantly check that my anger is not spilling over into other interactions. Its more work. 

More work at trying to seem perfect. Keep it together. Under wraps. To constantly be checking if my thought or emotion was my natural response to an event, risidual from my hate for the Entity or false thoughts and emotions installed (influenced) by the Entity. 

Its like PTSD in my own emotional land scape, wondering when I might step on a mine, when will child abuse be triggered or my ex, or death, ect. 

Its a full time job.

Shut Up!! (Voices)

I wonder if other “schizophrenics” and or people who are battling demons hear “shut up!!” Over and over, or “Go home” which means “die” for the most part. “I’m never coming back here” or “don’t ever com here again” interchangeably. All are usually in a repeatative screaming tone for no reason…cause the Entity can you know kinda just talk regular if it wants. 

I have had a few others say they hear these same messages. But maybe not as frequently as I do. At first they use to scare me because I didn’t know what they meant. And now they don’t, because I still don’t know what they mean. I mean on a basic level sure, but not as it would apply to my life.

Stay Lit (a curse)

In the spiritual community there is all this back and forth about light vs dark ect ect. 

“Be the light” “you are the light” 

In I guess more psychological terms “of the light” I would assume to take the “high road”, make decisions not based solely on ego. I would assume. 

But the flip side to the “the light” is also “false light”. When this Entity first made itself known. It said “a beacon of light!” , trying to play off my ego on readings of light workers and all the cosmic updates. 

The Entity later in said, “I lit her up like a Christmas tree.” Many if not all of the “sparkles” I saw of many different colors. Ranging from white to black, green, blue, red, purple, blue. To my observation were “curses”. Be them burns, or other sensations, thought forms, visuals ect. These are just one of the many tricks of false light. 

As I said in prior post, one day my grandma saw a piece of glitter on my forehead from school and told me it means “angels are with me”. Several decades later this was used against me to be lured and lulled into the lie of false light. 

Being “lit up like a Christmas tree”…. Doesn’t feel good, it doesn’t look good, it is not good, it is every terrible thing about this world poured over your head, its being steeped into a delusion. 

Sleep Possession

As I go to sleep now…. Forced or just an attempt….. Something different happens…. And more frequent. 

Its like sleep possession or pre-sleep possession. Because I am in a very relaxed state… Or anytime I find myself just about to go to sleep, it as if the radio is tuned to a loud station of someone talking for maybe 3 seconds, or almost like another “spirit” demon entity thing comes in hells loud.

This happened every so often before but not as often now.

I call this sleep possession, it’s because 

1. usually feels like its been zapped (hearing or feeling it) feels like a crown opening for maybe a brief moment with a lasting after affect or pressure on some area of my head 

2. Its literally like blacking out. Topics that don’t make sense make sense or I have no choice in accepting. I am vulnerable. Think of how you are convince a dream is real. No think of that same feeling with only voices and no visual dream. My personal dreams rarely have full on voices like this.

3. The topics range from cognative to making absolutely NO sense what so ever. At times I wonder if it is my brain or cognative understanding that allows for demons/ entities to feel so human and intelligent. When MY brain is at is lowest fiction state (before going to sleep) is makes less and less sense…. Much like a dream. But we are OK with dreams not making much sense. That’s why we TRY to make sense of them….. When they happen.

4. In this particular state relaxed, low brain wave function the topics vary. Sometimes I will be like ONE prodiminite word that will be loud and clear as my brain is zapped. Say “yin yang” in a females voice. Now if my life wasn’t complete shit show I would hold on to “yin yang” dearly as some mysitical sign. But because this an indicator to the randomness I just have to cope. For now. These black out moments are aften about dominating a brain. Almostly like careless children dangerously playing make believe in your head. The danger being you might belive it….. But mostly that it physically hurts. They also chooses topics that I don’t like, my fears or insulting topics, by the delivery is often not very cognitive.

I am often trying to go to sleep now cause I just don’t wanna come with the yakity yak allllll day…. The constant debating, defending, belittling, treats on my life and disgusting topics. So this time right before sleep becomes an opportunity to attack…. And also almost practice mind control. Will I believe the non-sense that go on about before I sleep? 

No, because I don’t give a fuck.