To See or Not To See

Conscious creates our environment. Once we become conscious of an idea or form we are no longer unconscious.

Immediately after becoming conscious the subject that we were unconscious of alters.

A relationship forms regardless of the nature of the object and subject. The object and subject become Meridians that now are connected by the Phenomena or Science of Quantum Entanglement.

Most of this activity occurs in a metaphysical nature or state in the subconscious which the Modern day authority of psychology believes to be 30,000-100,000 times the size of the conscious.

In representation we can compare the conscious as our body and the subconscious as or Soul or Spirit

In the Quantum Physics Double Slit Light Wave experiment the light wave or laser changes motion when and or as observed by a conscious thought complex.

Therefore if we are being observed without knowing or being conscious of the observer nonetheless our subconscious knows and is conscious with the ability in time to translate the observer to our conscious via the meridians and the Quantum Entanglement that now exists between the observer and the observer or the object and the subject.

This dual nature or natural duality is a relationship that takes turns in the Law of Opposites.

The observer becomes the observed and the observed becomes the observer. It’s a matter of consciousness knowing the subject and object and identifying the cycle of time each one represents in the relationship.

β€œWhen you stare into the abyss the abyss also stares into you.” ~ Nietzsche

Advertisements

Faith vs Religion πŸ™πŸΌ

So part of me wants to be a moon loving, sun soakin, crystal wearing, incense burning, horoscope reading, nature hippy dippy weirdo.

And then the other part of me wants to be a devoted Christian so that God loves me back. Because apparently burning sage and doing yoga conflicts with faith.

I try not to let the internet and the vast interpretation of religion and bible get to me.

But someone said God looks after his children. And while I know on the material plane I have been fortune to make it to 35 years. But on the spiritual plane I have not been so fortunate.

I can’t say it was because of this or that. But I can’t seem to wrap my head around why I am being attacked. Some say kundalini, some said I’m a budding light worker, a twin flame or one of the 144k that the Bible speaks of and NONE of that has helped me nor seems to apply to why I am being attacked on the “spiritual plane” to the point I must fear for my life.

And it’s not really the “spiritual plane” if others can see them in a photo or if my body is being physically attacked to the point I must go to the emergency.

The post on Facebook says God takes care of his children. And I just wonder why I am left to be raped in every sense of the word by demons?

I guess I am not “blessed and highly favored” or one of God children or the elect “chosen ones” people keep trying to fill my head with.

This doesn’t make me a piece of shit.

I’m just not that. Doesn’t mean I’m gonna go run and pray to some goat God. But all I see is crazy shit. I feel of sound mind and body. But I just hear and feel and see the craziest shit. And THAT’S as if living in THIS world wasn’t crazy enough. We gotta add a layer of hell with reptilian whatever raping me over it.

I don’t know what to do anymore.

Consent in the Spirit/ Astral world?

Is there?!???!??

Is there?!?

Is this the new frontier for perverts?!

I have been SOOOO PSYCHICALLY AND SPIRITUALLY VIOLATED….. raped molested….. where is the fucking consent to be all up in my shit?

Is it ABSOLUTELY necessary to touch my vagina 24 hours a day?

It’s sick shit!

Is it to much to ask to fucking ask for fucking permission before you start interacting with someone?

There are PLENTY of weirdos out there that want to play and have astral sex and whatever other insane shit you can come up with.

Like if I say NO that should be the end of the fucking discussion. If we never spoke about work being done to MY BODY then that should be a conversation FIRST unless I know otherwise.

I trust nothing spiritual or astral or etheric now.

I don’t know if the astral world will be around for much longer. It’s being and been abused. It’s not suppose be a mask to rape unsuspecting victims.

But we will see it’s not my call.

OD Stupid 😴

So I took my 100mg of Seroquel along with 200mgs of Zzzquil so I could go to sleep and stay asleep. I have done this before. But this time I felt like I was dying.

WELP either one of a few things happened:

1. I was severely attacked

2. My medication interacted this time.

3. I hallucinate this experience.

4. Some strange combination of all.

The demons/voice don’t like when I take zzzquil or go to sleep so naturally thats what I want to do. So I end up taking zzzquil to stay asleep and and going to sleep to minimize my interaction with them since they hate me so much.

Im not addicted just interested in pissing them off and from what I experienced last night which felt like waves of death I think they are pissed off.

A female voice said ,”you just lost a friend” I had no idea what that meant because I personally didn’t consider any of them a friend of mine. My body then proceeded to go into waves of death, like my life force was being drained out of me. Then it stopped then it happened again a little less intense. So I decided to go to the emergency cause I thought I might be having a stroke. Or a heart attack because of these demons.

Thankfully I wasn’t.

So what was happening?

Why don’t they like zzzquil hmm?

So much they would attack me?

I wonder if over the counter sleep meds “lowers my vibrations” I like myself better on them and fully rested than irritated and easily annoyed because of these demons.

But the sensation these demons are currently giving me is like a nerves burning, waves of it. It’s not pleasant in the least. I think I know which entity is in charge of of these sensations. But it’s not always easy to pin point.

Either way……… this shit is wack.

You’re So Gay! πŸ™„

I X out my name, my “friend” here randomly called me gay as an insult like I had been lying to him about it.

I honestly have been having some issues with my sexual orientation as I try to reconcile my faith and having a FLEET of demons attack my ass.

So I think it’s natural to wonder was it because I’m queer (which is NOT GAY), was it because I had premarital sex? Didn’t keep the sabbath? Sex worked to pay rent that one time 15 years ago? Smoked weed? Shrooms?

I honestly thought God loved me regardless of my orientation. 😞 I honestly thought the whole condemning gays was more about stepping out on a marriage /adultery/lying. And I didn’t trust humans cause I felt like they focused of it a bit to much when there were are whole BUNCH of other things to focus on. I thought the sin was NOT being who you are (with in reason) the “higher self”. But you have to know yourself in order to be that. I never saw being queer about SEX but love and loving who I love and sex was just how we expressed that. But that’s just my small human mind. I just didn’t think it would cost me housing and jobs and friends and sanity.

But queer seems to stick out always.

Enough to get kicked out from my parents and be homeless, enough to be discriminated against at work and loose my job. Enough for the Demonic Entity voices to call me a pedophile lesbian bitch.

This suppose to be my friend who’s a guy . And then he goes on to say he likes lesbians. But I honestly identify as nothing now. I have no orientation because I’m sick to my stomach. I tried so many relationships they all failed miserably. Then to find out there are like Demonic aliens playing The SIMs human edition with my love life and fucking up my relationships doesn’t give me faith in the next. And then on top of it seeing pedo child molestation shit in visions is a HUGE 🀒🀒🀒🀒🀒🀒🀒🀒 turn off to LIFE so I’m fucking good on being stressed out by dick.

I tried my best to give love and I was fortune enough to at least feel that even if was short lived in queer relationship with my ex soul mate.

But I will not have my guy friend throw my orientation in my face like an insult. I’m tired of being condemned.

I’m not sure if I should continue to talk to him. I unfriended him and told him goodbye and why I was saying goodbye and that I forgave him. BUT I’m not sure if I should talk to him ever again.

My only concern right now is 1. Getting rid of these demons in a responsible way 2. Healing these wounds. NOT CREATING NEW ONES. 3 getting healthy again.

Relationships and all that other stuff is kind of not really a big deal a much as I would love to curl into a ball in the arms of a lover.

Exposing the Enemy (Occultism): Breaking Curses from Masonic in Your Life!

Exposing the Enemy (Occultism): Breaking Curses from Masonic in Your Life!
β€” Read on walkingintruth.blogspot.com/2005/07/breaking-curses-from-masonic-in-your.html

This talks about how they are pedos and they rape and choke people and the demons and IAM and invoking a lot of stuff I talked about in this blog as well as becoming religiously numb because of the torture.

Please read this article if you are suffering from spiritual warfare!!!

Natural vs Demonic πŸŒ—

So I have my monthly moon cycle. Prior to being attacked it was a beautiful flow. Always came on time and healthy with not much pain. With being attacked (and I’m not saying for that do experience painful moon cycles) I have numbness, I feel like I literally beat up, I saw myself getting shot in the stomach by Geckos prior to my period, rumbling, all sorts of aches and pains. Not a fun moon cycle.

Then I have a friend who I am able to have telepathy with. But I am currently with in this curse. I wonder if I would still hear him with out the curse. What would be my natural state of being. The cleanest. What would be our cleanest state of communication when it came to telepathy.

Right now I assume everything is the devil. Lol cause that what it feels like. I have a demon here with me turning every experience into something vile and insane, so of course it is only natural to assume that.

But if that was cleansed?

So what is our innate and natural abilities and what are the illusions set forth as traps by Demonic entities to lure us in to make it seem as though we have “powers” that we may not actually have?

I might have one ability maybe not another and the mess with me or maybe it’s all a farce.

Trying to discern and develop as a being.

Earth really is a trap house!

Energetic Bodies

So I took a photo of my body in a dim lit room like I do to see other things.

And I saw that my energetic (I think it is mine or it could be another being) had 3 holes in it. It looked almost a cavern. I saw a pair of eyes in one of the holes.

Then I remember in January a gang of 30 or more Geckos all shot me in my stomach and then my eating habits changed. I wrote about in my blog.

Then maybe 3 months later a male face came to me and removed a band of maybe 5 astral parasites but left one that I could still feel and later saw.

My assumption was that the astral parasites were covering or closing the holes that was caused by the attack in January.

Why they were taken away or I was attacked in the first place I am unsure.

Any time I pray I get attacked

Any time I pray I get attack with some new fresh hell…..

I will spare you details because it would be like spreading it but it’s it’s in in the same themes they always have sexual perversion.

I prayed for my sister cause she hasn’t been feeling well like before she had the stroke. And I got scared. And I don’t know if it’s really her health or these demons attacking her.

I snuck a photo of here and saw a long parasite wrapped around her stomach and something glowing on the eye she had surgery on.

She eats healthy ish, lots of salads and fruits …….. but it’s a lifestyle change she would need like a full detox and it’s drastic and I know she’s not going to do that or listen to me m. I just prayed and put in Gods hands and asked the one true God to let me know if there is anything I can do to assist my sister. Because the demons blamed me for my sister stroke. Said “you couldn’t even save your sister.”

So this morning the demons gave me a really bad dream involving my sister 😭😭😭😭😭😭😳😳😭😳😭😭😳😳😭😭😭😳😳😳😳😭😭😳😞 and I hate my life and kind of just waiting to die really.

Just waiting to die.

I know it’s not me or my subconscious mind or any of that shit. It’s a demon. Or many…. but I’m just waiting to die and I’m going to keep on being a tattle tale until that day comes.

So yack yack yickity yyack yack!

Fucking nasty assholes pieces of shit.

Seroquel Update

I’m on Seroquel 100mg once a day at night

Where I passed out the first night. It no longer helps me sleep.

I find that I am becoming more …….. complacent with talking back to the voices where before I was making a good effort not to talk back to them.

Complacent that’s how I feel on this drug.

My eyes are shifting and feeing like they are specifically being electrocuted after taking the medication at night.

I smoke and snack (but don’t like meals) more on this drug. My will is taken away and my ability to by satisfied is not there.

Dizzy

My hearing will become tin canny.

Hallucinations are all still there.