Ori vs Akasha 🌟

According to Wiki “Ori (Yoruba), or known as OrΓ­ in Latin America, is an Orisha and metaphysical concept.

Ori, literally meaning “head,” refers to one’s spiritual intuition and destiny. It is the reflective spark of human consciousness embedded into the human essence, and therefore is often personified as an Orisha in its own right. It is believed that human beings are able to heal themselves both spiritually and physically by working with the Orishas to achieve a balanced character, or iwa-pele. When one has a balanced character, one obtains an alignment with one’s Ori or divine self. It is also believed that Ori be worshiped like Orisha. When things are not going right, Ori should be consulted. And to make things right Ori should be appeased. This is because whatever one becomes or whatever happens in one’s life is as destined by Ori.”

This came across my screen tonight after a friend mentioned this about his artwork. “Ori” reminded me of “Akasha Aether” which I just learned about Friday.

Essentially “head” energy.

Akasha Aether seems to be even more allusive than Ori in definition maybe because it’s so individualized and personalized.

In the YouTube video on The Secret of Ether’s at time 12:00 Doug Gabriel goes on to say the Akasha although a eastern concept is basically “Christ Consciousness”. Essentially, your consciousness is elevated with in Christ. Christ is both worshipped and consulted and so essentially Christ could be considered an Ori (maybe πŸ˜³πŸ˜±πŸ€”πŸ˜•) maybe I am pushing it?

The comparison is not meant to be disrespectful, but actually respectful of how beautifully different our cultures are and how shockingly similarly some concept eventually meet along the road.

I know what Christianity did to Yoruba and how Europeans used the gospel to excuse their unforgivable acts on a people, but at the heart I can not at that is the bases of Christianity. If anything based on my little bit of knowledge Christianity is about Freedom! Liberation!

Unfortunately it is Hooomans that give it a bad name. And these demons are doings a pretty good job at distorting it conceptually as well with religious delusions and distortions.

So we have a ways to go before we reach Christ consciousness as a whole collectively. That meaning mastery of ones self, that meaning one with God and law which means respect for ALL. That means everything!

As someone outside of Christianity or Ifa (Yoruba) or other “spiritual” belief systems that what ever would have been considered an Ori, an outside force or energy, that because I have no original origins or beliefs this possibly upset the “Ori”.

I’m for shizzle not a Satan worshiper. I thought Spirit/ancestors where to be respected. Angels much appreciated. God and Christ loved and praised.

Someone told me I have a “negative guide” but I’m unsure where I would have gotten that from. Is it because I have no fixed origin “bitsa” (a word the entity wrote in a few of my photos) that I confuse the Akasha energy or Ori which makes this process way more painful than it should?

If that is the case, wouldn’t my love for culture and knowledge be a check mark? Or the fact I try to see where concepts meet. Honestly never in my adult life did I bridge so many gaps together SO FAST and STILL not have the answers I am looking for. How? WHY?!?!!!!! Who are you?!

Just pondering life and why it is the way it is. These aren’t facts just the inner thoughts of some random woman on the internet. 😚

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Shade | The Magicians: What I See 😱

” Shades are the part of the soul that makes people process complex emotions like love and pain…”
β€” Read on themagicians.wikia.com/wiki/Shade

At the height I was seeing beings with big holes in their chest. They seemed like temporary versions of a larger being (usually humanism). Like fractal that constantly are being birthed and consumed of themselves (makes no sense, it’s the only way I can describe it).

Some had holes there some had a smaller being in their chest.

When I heard about “Shade” in the series the Magicians, it kind of reminded me of the beings with a hole in their chest. (See the “shadeless” section of the link.)

I still don’t know all of what I see. I just know I see it. And there seems to be many different names and many different explanations.

This also goes back to my previous post that “what’s so wrong with being human?” Divinity and Humanness.

It seems not until our emotions are manipulated, disregarded that they perpetuate the cycle of pain.

But who the fuck am I? Hmm? Some doe eyed young buck with a foul mouth that’s only been on the earth 35 years technically 36 if you count womb incubation.

So is this the underworld? Overworld? I mean bravo on the spooky haunted house hell display.

And no one has answers?

I love earth and Gods work……. But seriously fuck this matrix.

Cells Squeak And Sparkle ✨

When I stretch I can hear my cells squeak.

Especially in my root chakra area and my chest neck ears.

When I look I can not see the full figure. But the energetic shadow and the space jelly like blob around it. It sparks these tiny little barely noticeable sparks and would look like dust otherwise when they are looked at.

It doesn’t like to be noticed or looked at.

It hurts as well. Feels tight.

It’s either causes or attaches to pain.

I feel a pain in my chest. I can see the pain attached to the outside of my chest.

Sometimes I will wiggle my hips like a snake and hear the squeaking of my cells with the energy and then notice a release in my nose or head. I can then breathe for a moment or relax from the tension in my head.

It’s constant although it has lessened since the beginning.

Some people have told me this is “kundalini” but a guru of sorts said it was not. Just like they told me I am not a twin flame. Said I am a light worker, I can tell you for sure I am not.

So every time I look for a path, although this mimics all of them I am told this is not it. And that is fine.

What mimics every spiritual pathway and yet is not it?

13 Spirit Truth you Learn Once you Wake the fuck up! 😱

1. Black magic is real and Satan is a lie. And will try to convince you of suicide.

2. Apparently the universe gets easily confused in the law of attraction so you have to say the right words because intention and heart is not enough.

3. You give more often with it never being reciprocal.

4. To make our lives have meaning we must draw a story up out of a series of random events. But what evil does not understand is that we are trying to make this ugly pretty.

5. No.

6. No.

7. I saw an alien ghost rise out of my belly, so I’m not sure which gut we are talking about.

8. Real love heals but is often rare in this world.

9. Not sure yet.

10. Meditation assist in observing the insanity you allowed to guide you through out this life. It’s ok. We all did.

11. Screaming helps once you realize 10.

12. Nature is magical.

13. Magical shouldn’t be just our lack of understanding more our ignorance.

Type 0000 if you’re tired of seeing meaningless reoccurring numbers.

Sweet Dreams ✨

I had the first nice dream in a really long time.

The tonality was still darkish nighttime a mixture city life and enchanted forest my grandparents were there. It was a celebration. It wasn’t as fast paced as the other ones or scary.

I feel like I should say something nice in this blog and describe the dream in detail but then it’s like the only nice thing I’ve experienced in this experience and I don’t want to ruin it. But I don’t want to forget it.

I usually remember all my dreams. Super scary and the really nice ones. This was a really nice ones. But as soon as I woke up the Entity was trying to ruin it.

I wonder who’s who in all of this…. what’s what. Is the voice the same one who give me the dreams? If so why would he want to ruin it?

I actually had two dreams. But as I woke up I choose to recall the celebration.

What makes our dreams?

I can no longer say it’s just my subconscious. Although there are subconscious stuff in there.

It wasn’t in this dream but there was a glowing pink and yellow dragon fly/humming bird that seemed soooooo familiar to me. These things that write. There was also a monkey that writes with his tail that seemed familiar. And these other things that look kind of like atoms.

I’ve lumped everything into the bad category. Because all I was experiencing was some pretty sick stuff.

Then with this nice dream I wonder if that’s the lure and you end up paying the price of a dream production with a living nightmare.

I always cherished my dreams.

I just don’t know. This Babalow (basically a Santeria shaman), once said if you have dreams you have a problem. Something like that.

Maybe these dream makers are suppose to visit us every once in a while, in our sleep when we are unconscious. Maybe that is the designated play time. Not our waking life which then equals schizophrenia or if one has knowledge mysticism.

Either way I still appreciate my dreams.

I just wish this all made sense. Maybe I’m not suppose to like them.

I have seen human faces slip back into a Entities appearance when I looked at them directly in between dreams. Almost like glamour.

Idk anymore.

Awakening and Rites of Passage

What is the difference between secret societies and say spiritual communities.

My mind rolled through so many things. Mainly culture and consent.

Much of what I know from like secret society there is a level of consent that is broken. Usually Hazing. But in spiritual communities a person is prepared through teachings for a journey.

I had both and neither. No spiritual meme on the internet could have prepared me for awakening, no scripture for the hazing of schizophrenia.

I guess not until you are actually there. And by then ……. preparation doesn’t matter.

If one no longer consents to their awakening or cultural “rite of passage” does it stop it? Do you even have that right? What happens after? Do our journeys become less rich because we wanted to tell our own stories?

Is wisdom only experienced?

I am saddened by how much value we give pain in our society. “No pain no gain” “sacred wounds” I have even heard the term “sacred abuse”.

Pain happens so much in this body. To the point we learn to overlook the pain. We can say the same thing for collective body as a people. Humanity.

We overlook our pain. The times when things were not ok but we just kept going. We didn’t address it out of fear, or properly treat it.

So when will our rites of passage be the one where we get to tell OUR stories. Actually tell our stories. Free of reactions to your pain inflicted.

Beyond reckoning or reconciliation.

True creators.

Soul Star Chakra 🌟: Archon Halo ☁ πŸ‘Ό ☁

So…………. The Archon’s portal energy balls I see on peoples heads and including my own look like halos you see in paintings. Straight up, no bullshit….. They are not glowing but they can invert from dark in the middle to light/clear on the outside or vice versa considering the lighting situation inside.

Last year my “twin flame” therapist told me about the “soul star chakra” which is also known as the “halo chakra”.

Simple stated in the link above “Your 8th Chakra known as the Soul Star Chakra is located about 12 inches to 3 feet from the top of your head (just above your Crown Chakra). Your Soul Star Chakra contains infinite energy, spirituality, Divine Wisdom and compassion. Also known as the Halo Chakra it’s what you see depicted in the historic paintings of Jesus Christ, the Saints and other Divine Masters. This chakra is the essential bridge between your Higher Self/Soul Self in the higher dimensions of reality and your incarnated human self (your personality and physical expression of your soul in third dimensional reality).

As your Soul Star Chakra becomes activated and expands you’ll begin to feel a strong need to align yourself with your Soul’s Mission to finally BE what you know on deeper levels you’re here to BE.”

Only I magically got the opposite! Why I gotta get the Satan halo? Is it suppose to be painful? This painful? 

Many people are saying that yes the body has natural chakras … And 3rd eye and all this good stuff but for some reason these natural systems are being manipulated and information is being falsafied so they can take advantage of us. 

There is an overlay. And its so painful. Like why doesn’t anyone tell you hey as some point you gonna get a half and shit it painful cause inter dimensional entities will prolly suck up you brain juices. I need a manual for this shit. 

Imaginary Friend πŸƒπŸ‘»πŸƒ

I had some “the gruge” like or alien raptor visuals in the begining ….. But I laughed at them …. So oddly my visuals are not AS strong although I have like floating emojis around the house which are odd and visions of child abuse or which is terrifying or random photos of people. 

I guess I am more stern because of the auditory …. Speaking creates more of a relationship. So it’s like one moment the voices would have me crying from saying moms gonna die, then sucidial from a sick visual of child sexual abuse and then trying manipulate me back into a friendly demeanor by making jokes or saying they love me. I realized this was a cycle of abuse. 

The Reconciliation /Honeymoon phase is “The victim feels pain, fear, humiliation, disrespect, confusion, and may mistakenly feel responsible. Characterized by affection, apology, or, alternatively, ignoring the incident, this phase marks an apparent end of violence, with assurances that it will never happen again, or that the abuser will do his or her best to change.” 

The first time I was introduced to this was when my best friend in high school told me that her mom would beat her, and then clean her wounds and tell her sorry and it won’t happen again and do it again. I asked my mom if she could live us but she couldn’t. 

Once I found this habitual pattern of abuse…. As much as those funny moments are so important for relief to the constant verbal abuse… To love and not hate…. To laugh….. I sadly had to accept that these voices will never change…. And I can no longer enable their abuse. Nor can I trust any attempt to gain my trust. 

This is called trauma. Not being able to leave a state of constant distrust or being on gaurd…… Physically harms the body in itself as well as how I interact with others. I’m trying to simply be clear and stern about my boundaries rather than be become a full blown narc. But it hurts and its hard because this is NOT my true nature. 

Sans the sick twisted abusive stuff…. I have no problem having an imaginary alien rapture friend that remixes gregorian music, plays air ghost tic tac toe and makes decent jokes given a natrual break in communication and with out pain from them touching me is gone.

Yea…. I am liberal about being crazy.

Black Obsidian: Root Chakra

So last night that insane “root chakra” vibrating rumble, burning, pin prick almost feels like my core is being yanked out…yea that feeling happened and so I put this obsidian on my vagina (non sexual yall, sorry its the demons fault I even think like that now).

Uhm it didn’t stop the vibration because then it just intensified… But it seems like it diverted it for a little while from directly with my cells. 

The virbatiin happens from the thighs all the way to the vagina area…. Sometimes a little further up into the actual reproductive system…. Sometimes feel like and empty yanking….. You know when your stomach growls… It feels like that but then a yanking sensation.

I know its one of those portal archon disks that’s doing this to me. They can get big or small…. Right small enough to be on the clit area and super annoying or large enought to include my thighs. I put my hand down there and usually it stop it but this time it was  so strong I could feel the buzz with my hand. 

I have used my thighs to squeeze it out more times then I have the energy for. Some say its “kundalini”. But can you actually push kundalini out if its naturally part of your spiritual body? 

Also there is no progressions to it. Kundalini I thought was suppose to progress in come way. 

I have had “kundalini” like sensation go up my back, very similar to to the root chakra…. But that always feel like a leaving sensation. 

It doesn’t make me feel good. I don’t like it I have no idea what’s going on….. Or why or the point of it all.

I just feel violated. I’ve never violated anyone. Ok maybe tickling my sister.

Either way the crystal didn’t help. Yes I cleaned them. Everyone keeps telling me to use crystals and so far they are only beautiful objects. A security blanket in the freezing winter.

——-+

UPDATE Google Doc SearchDoctor diagnosed Vibrating Vagina. I finally got the nerve to ask my doctor about the vibrating/humming sensation in my vagina. … He said the sensation is due to blood flow. The blood flow can cause turbulence which results in the vibratingfeeling.

———

I mean blood flows….  But in that way there is a stimuli like when you are with a lover…. Or there is a threat to the body. So just blood flow is not a good enough answer for me. But it is ONE biological answer. When I would squeeze my thighs until I heard a crunch I would see the fast clear circle shoot out from legs. 

Sometimes I wonder if I’m fucking myself up more than these aliens are just trying to figure out what’s happening to my body and why I don’t feel connected to it. 

Idk. I hate this. 

Lightened Photo

If I didn’t see this shape drop down in front of my eyes or mark my skin then I would say hey this prolly just a camera glitch.

This is the first time I caught on camera what I was drawing.

No one else is seeing it…  And its clear as day and making me feel crazy. And I thought I was a rational person.