Petty Post: Bashee

So I legit have this Banshee looking ghost thing following me its in some of my photos and on my skin. Its in the photo of my arm in the background and in the drawing in a previous post.

Anyway so i decided to google Banshee just to see if they really look like that.

And then when I googled the first thing that popped up was Banshee Pub.

I jokingly said to myself i should go there.

Then I took a look inside and realize was the first time of 3 of the last times I would see my ex (twin flame). I cried for the first time in front of him there. We split the bill on a few drinks. I went home, he walked away. I never felt understood or like i could understand with him. LOL I needed my best friend to constantly decipher messages so i didnt get worked up about “wtf does that even mean?”

But whatever.

I have a the ghost of a banshee moving around on my body and fucking up my life. And Bashee Pub just happened to be one of the places I died.

UPDATE: So the Banshee showed up on my upper arm again. And I was in the bathroom and had my arm on the sink when I noticed it. And so I said, “Hi, thanks for ruining my life.” And the Banshee legit changed faces looking down like “my bad”. 

So if children scribbles drawings of banshees are welting up on my arm and showing fake remorse for ruining my life, I need Jesus and the best medicine I can get my hands on cause this shit is CRAY! 

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“Remember Who Gave You Your Crown” 👑

“Remember Who Gave You Your Crown”, the Entity said to me posing as my Ex (twin flame). The story was of Isis and Osiris. And I was to be his Queen. Many image themselves as Kings and Queens, Gods and Goddesses. But I wanted to be me. 

I hadn’t fully realized I was in what I called “Opposite World”. Everything was flipped, Everything was a lie, and even if I figured that something was a lie, that could be a lie too. Its a set up. And you never win. I had no choice but to play along until I figured out what was happening to me. I cried so much. 

I felt my head become hot and tender. I literally felt like my skull had been opened and exposed. Like my brain was bring directly spoken into. It was loud.

I had read that this COULD be symptoms of kundalini or the opening of the crown chakra, also known as a halo, and the “soul star chakra”. I tried to understand. Little did I know. 

In opposite world everything is a lie, everything is an opposing force to the very essence of your being. When I was told “remember who gave you your crown”, I didn’t realize the very opposite was happening. I wasnt being given a “crown”, my crown was being taken away. My mind was no longer mine. I didn’t have control, I didn’t have room. I mean I still don’t fully. 

This was a check mate.

Using my Ex (Twin Flame) as a guise to get inside my head for lord knows what, for god knows what reasons.

I was shot down from my throne. Viciously attacked ….. Constantly attacked to the point of debilitation. 

I will still never understand why.

Now my home is under attack. The are the shadow spots that spew these things at me. I can’t see everything. But I can see and feel enough. 

My body is reacting to the attacks again. Rashes, burning.

The Entities would say “I WIN!”, but it won by showing me visions of child sexual abuse until I gave up and decided to die crying in my bed. Everyday.

If that’s winning ….. I’m OK with loosing.

But I want to fight back. I’m tired of my mind being a canvas for its sick images. 

👑🙏😢

Master of None

I’m not trying to be rude but when it comes to Gurus, Masters, Enlightened, those who have ascended to 5D+ always seem so igmatic or mysterious or insane.

I currently respect any level of sanity/insanity an individual is able to maintain in this lifetime under these circumstances. 

But I’m trying to understand why would someone go “insane” during or after being “enlightened”? 

Is the mysterious air a way of cloaking our individual insanity? I mean ….  I in no way identify as being enlighten and feel quiet the opposite, but as I interact with certain people in forums…. I at times DO have to hold back… 1. To not place or project my own fear onto someone else 2. To not feel like I’m encouraging or discouraging for whatever experience may come there way (if there is a choice 😞). I only wave an air of caution as my personal experience SUCKED every single type of balls on the planet. 

But I in no way want to come off as mysterious…. I’m also not a Guru…. I’m also not “awakened”, but I am in a hell of an experience that I didn’t know existed or was even possible, and seems some people are in the same thing too. 

I try to be as brutally and disgustingly honest about my experience because I in NO way would want someone to think tripping this many balls is fun. Or get sucked into the peace and love fantasy, or the other side, like we are going to fly through space and end up in a better place called heaven… Or 5D.

I personally was able (previously) to use these abstract concepts… As both the fantasy/ creativity, as well as apply them to my daily life. 

Say for instance Angel numbers. Seeing an “angel number” or receiving your personal number you identify with (note most screen handle names) is fine…. You see it maybe every so often…. Take it as a “sign” your “angels” are with you…. That calms you that comforts you…. And then you start seeing them every hour to the point it has no meaning….. To the point it obsessive …. And then you’re like WHY is this happening? And you freak out.   And try to make meaning out of it out. And some tells you their experience…. And maybe you find comfort in that …. And maybe you don’t. But something that once was innocent…. Conceptual mindfulness….. Or just for fun…. becomes ……. insanity.

These are suppose to be tools or entertainment. Like you read a book…. And maybe that book changed your life and how you may view the world…. Or inspired you. But at what point does it all go wrong? Who or what chooses the tool… the weapon against you? Why was it this instead of that? Why was it this relationship and not another?

Enlightenment? 

Its not you glowing out in the ethers with your chakas and auras and merkabas …. These are concepts…. Images … A tool for understanding. Its much more chaotic than that. 

But I am concerned for the current state of our people. 

But why the mystery? Why held by some and not all? Why must one “go insane” instead of having a pleasant experience? Why is pain a tool? More than we already have with the nearing of death every moment. Is love ONLY pleasure seeking? I never thought of love as such… I mean even if I get into a fight with someone I usually (not always), try to come from a place of love.

Someone said the opposite of love is apathy. And fear is a means towards apathy (numb) . 

Almost there.