“Remember Who Gave You Your Crown” πŸ‘‘

“Remember Who Gave You Your Crown”, the Entity said to me posing as my Ex (twin flame). The story was of Isis and Osiris. And I was to be his Queen. Many image themselves as Kings and Queens, Gods and Goddesses. But I wanted to be me. 

I hadn’t fully realized I was in what I called “Opposite World”. Everything was flipped, Everything was a lie, and even if I figured that something was a lie, that could be a lie too. Its a set up. And you never win. I had no choice but to play along until I figured out what was happening to me. I cried so much. 

I felt my head become hot and tender. I literally felt like my skull had been opened and exposed. Like my brain was bring directly spoken into. It was loud.

I had read that this COULD be symptoms of kundalini or the opening of the crown chakra, also known as a halo, and the “soul star chakra”. I tried to understand. Little did I know. 

In opposite world everything is a lie, everything is an opposing force to the very essence of your being. When I was told “remember who gave you your crown”, I didn’t realize the very opposite was happening. I wasnt being given a “crown”, my crown was being taken away. My mind was no longer mine. I didn’t have control, I didn’t have room. I mean I still don’t fully. 

This was a check mate.

Using my Ex (Twin Flame) as a guise to get inside my head for lord knows what, for god knows what reasons.

I was shot down from my throne. Viciously attacked ….. Constantly attacked to the point of debilitation. 

I will still never understand why.

Now my home is under attack. The are the shadow spots that spew these things at me. I can’t see everything. But I can see and feel enough. 

My body is reacting to the attacks again. Rashes, burning.

The Entities would say “I WIN!”, but it won by showing me visions of child sexual abuse until I gave up and decided to die crying in my bed. Everyday.

If that’s winning ….. I’m OK with loosing.

But I want to fight back. I’m tired of my mind being a canvas for its sick images. 

πŸ‘‘πŸ™πŸ˜’

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Twin Flame or Alien Love Bite? – Alien Orchestrated Human Bonding Dramas

https://www.bibliotecapleyades.net/vida_alien/alien_lovebite01.htm

So this article only speaks on the aliens love bite but I will also look up information if someone has written anything on the direct correlation between alien love bites and twin flame.

If you think about it it makes sense. Entities supposedly feed off of negative energy and whats worse than a long drawn out longing for the love that is unrequited?

What’s funny is that many many many in the “twin flame” community are also those in the “love and light” and yet seem extremely unaware. 

There are teenagers on YouTube and forums BEGGING to meet their “twin flame”, and that actuallybsvares me because it is something way beyond you “meeting the greatest karmic love of your life”, if anything it’s bullshit.

What it really is, is having extreme emotions and a longing for love that more than likely you will never get as long as these Entities are involved because they are playing you like a puppet. They watch you, they will pretend to be your twin flame to so sexual things to you.

And if you finally lay down the card call twin flame, it only gets worse. Etheric love making with your “twin flame” becomes entity rape. Spiraling down a rabbit hole of spiritually reasons that you feel a pain that is not justifyable until you hit the bottom and ran out of reasons…. That bottom is called Schizophrenia. 

Schizophrenia is torture with no story line other than your own freedom and soon the freedom of humanity once you realize how to humanity has been hypnotized.

Its sad, but I’m not quite sure why, of course “harvesting” negative energy or whatever, but with all of this technology being used couldn’t they figure out to replicate “negative energy to feed off of”? I mean humans are growing ears on rats, I think intelligent aliens can come up with an alternative method to meddling I. Human affairs and torturing the population for “negative energy”. 

I wonder if all the people making money off of twin flames actually explain this to people? Or do they profit from peddling a delusion to keep making money? 

And THATS where the spiritual community got me fucked up. And they have nerve to speak about religion. 

Active Prayer πŸ™

My aunt even told me that when she got sick (chronic fatigue), a few church members put hands on her and prayed. When one member checked up on her that asked if she was doing better. And my aunt responded honestly and said she did not feel better yet. 

The woman was almost offended and said that my aunt (who prays day and night) was not praying hard enough. My aunt didn’t feel well but still had her wits about her to not entertain a response. 

This “not enough” of ritualistic enactment has me baffled. When we are in the flow, our lives every step, becomes a prayer. The food we eat, the words we say, the thing we do, how we choose to interact and respond to the world. 

This is not to say we are perfect. But it is to say that we are aware, we are in peace and joy, thanks and praise.

This does not mean we turn the cheek to injustices to maintain our peace, but we respond to them from a clear mind and heart. Our peace brings peace to others. 

You are enough at every moment. Enough. 

At my uncle funeral my father said to me with tears in his eyes, “I’m not sure if I believe in God.”, I felt bad he was shaken in his human mortality. He is a nature guy. And my response was that “some people meet god at church, some meet god in nature.” His ethical and deep appreciation for nature, watching the shore lines change with his age. There is something special about that. He stared off. I’m not sure if my words stuck.

I later found out that my father had a huge problem with the church because they would beat them in chatholic school and he would excommunicated from another. The violence that he endured at school is the foundation with all things “spiritual” even incense. His feelings are valid. 

I mean even I could loose faith in a loving God through this whole demonic archonic jelly fish possession take over. But my faith was strengthened. I’m just not going to meditate/pray this many times a day and do this or that because I am enough. There is no excuse for this psychic/spiritual violence that I endure. Just as there is no reason my dad should have gotten a beaten from some nun for some mundane act.

They all serve to distract us from our faith. “Well if God was here this wouldn’t happen”, and at times this feels so true. But that is to keep us from our divinity. To keep us from the flow, in our active prayer and appreciation for Gods work.

And when are in appreciation of Gods work, we become creators too, inspired. God created the trees we carve a beautiful chair out of it (cutting down the rainforests aside). We become co-creators. Not destroyer’s of faith, the body, the mind, the family. We look to build each other up and have faith that in time…… Things will work out.

PoetrΓ©: How to Arrive at a Thought πŸŒΏπŸ‘‘πŸ’«πŸŒΏ

I stare into space, eyes crossed like lovers that just missed each other, like whispers in the night that never get you there, other than to the destination of a thought that was never yours. A tremble up your back.

I look behind me, a trail of pain and beauty, but then wonder why am I so ugly.

Please hug it away. Let it drop from my temple to the pit of my stomach. Remove its grips from my neck. Sacrifice the things unsaid. Because we have cast enough spells of intention, thoughts desperately grasp at to make a sense of their own and we end up cursed. 

Let there be more of me to fill every hollow space that serves as a hiding space for these things, so I can love you more.

Archon: Hypothesis : Movement πŸ’ƒ

OK. So I have a Hypothesis:

I was attack viciously each time I began to make strides in my health journey. Usually I lost about a 100lb but I also was super active. During these times I would start my health journey around when I was unemployed (less money for food and transportation) so I would end up walking or biking everywhere and had more time to think about this. 

Now this last attack had me floored unable to move from the physical, emotional and mental pain. So in some ways I gave up….. But that’s OK. However now I have two or three huge Archon’s (about the size of my head) comfortably “feeding off of me” one at a time. 

So there is something linked to my “health” and them. 

If something feels threatened what does it do? It attacks! 

It was a perfect storm….. Too perfect! My health was a threat and so it waited for the perfect opportunity to to attack and exploit any emotional or physical pain I may have had/have. 

Does being phsycially active drain them of opprotunity to steal your energy because in a sense you are using your own towards your wellness?

My only concern if for people who are not well and how this plays out for people who are unable to be active, then what?

I am sure many of you ARE in fact active but yet were still attacked. So I can’t conclude to anything just yet.

I can’t explain to you HOW aggressive this attack was. Like literally being in the pit of hell 24/7. Since it has mellowed out. The voice of the Archon does not me feel like my brain is about to explode, but I have also refused (protested in my body) to do much other than sit an observe these Archons for a year now making it extremely comfortable with in this cute chubby body.

Its like constantly being thrown off course each time worse than before each time you make major strides.

Meditation was good for learning to observe and discern what was me and what is NOT me. 

Yoga, messages, stretching, were all good in learning how to literally release energy in places you never paid attention to. 

Prayer, faith in God gave me hope that some day I, we all will be free. 

And Bruja, “white magic”, kitchen witchery, ancestory taught me the herbs, foods and intention of love that will heal/ clean the body and personal space. 

I just can’t seem to get all my gears going again cause these Archon’s are off the hook with attacking me anytime I make any strides. That’s why I just choose to sit here like a monk and not do anything. 

As much I want a reflection of love in my life, in a way I feel …… Diseased, dirty …. Even though I know we all have one. I guess that is real love, recognizing each other disease (archon) and vunerablity and healing that for each other in stead of exploiting the pain. That is a true power that very few can wield. 

I just don’t know why I can’t seem to do that myself. Alone. To banish these demons from every cell in my body. 

There has to be an answer, a way, a key, a perminate solution. 

Spiritual Abuse πŸ”ͺπŸ”«πŸ’£

There is no reason to be spiritually attacked there is no excuse. That’s like a rapist saying she asked for it because wore a short skirt. Fuck THAT!

Victims of spiritual/astral abuse will blame themselves. They will say, “I deserve this because I lied when I was 12 years old” or something just as ridiculous. We seek peace and that’s the easiest route than grabbing at air. But we seek NOW. Dwelling on the pasts on shortens our time in becoming the person we wish to be the best versions of ourselves. 

Our capitalist system says “you are not enough!” , so by this product and subscribe to this lifestyle. Spirituality /religion says you are not enough, you didn’t pray enough, you did something bad, some past life bullshit generational curse, that you didn’t meditate enough, that you didn’t eat organic enough. In relationships, we feel like we aren’t pretty enough, or doing enough or have enough money or enough love or trust. 

So it is NO WONDER these astral parasites …. Spiritual abusers go on to say YOU ARE NOT ENOUGH. You’re ugly, fat, skinny, stupid, crazy, no body likes you, you have no friends, kill yourself, no money, you are not good at what you do, you don’t know what you are doing, you need our guidance, unlovable, unworthy, you’re an addict, you will never understand, you don’t have knowledge. 

You will never be enough, when you are! 

I am a complete being. I have my own “dark” and own “light”. I grow as needed. Forced “darkness” or this bullshit “dark nigbt of the soul”, is abused pushed by astral parasites. Saying it’s because you did this or that, that YOU weren’t enough is excusing this program and act of spiritual violence. Finding peace and “learning from” the abuse is the gift we give ourselves to cope and to heal. We weave stories of some past life karma, a curse, blame ourselves. “This happened to me because…………….” 

Outside of that we are excusing unseen and intangible abuse. By subscribing to this idea that pain is our greatest teacher, is superficial and more than likely you never been in a full blown psychic attack.
You are saying our current system, all system are fine as is and should operate and function with no change.

This whole you “change your reality” is bullshit. You know how hard I’ve fought?!? All this law of attraction, most people want car, money love. I want the change, justice, peace, safety for all people! 

NOTE: The demon suggested pain and my smoking cigs (cause you devils advocate). Now do I know smoking is bad? Yes. Do I wish to change that? YES. Do I think I should be raped everyday by some demon for going on two years? NO.
Whatever. But I’m the crazy one.

Fuck this demon! 

Crazy Talk: Jelly Monster πŸ‘»πŸ’”

So I can see the effects of the demon, I can feel them, hear them, but I can’t see the actual demon that’s conducting it. 

I believe that many healer are able to remove the effects but not the actual entity. Maybe some can. But none of the ones I went to. 

So, I see this jelly monster (looks like a clear slimmer) that moves around me. I state previously in my blog that, I don’t think this is the entity but the “energy” it sends kinda like and extension of sorts it copies. Its not easy to see but I see it. I think its the same “energy” that screams repeatedly, mimics other peoples voices and music, repeats what I say, the gives me tremors and that can copy cat emotions like anxienty or headache, intense tension, feeling ill, being high. Prolly other things too like images/vision. Almost like AI intelligence toy, but its not the main and I feel like its being controlled. 

Today I was wondering HOW did the entity pull off things like knowing when my ex (false/ twin flame) was going to call, or what song he was going to send me, when the cat took my chair and I wasn’t in the room. And a few other “prediction” or plain old’ nosiness. 

Either way. My assumption is that this jelly monster was being nosey with my ex or attached to my ex. Something maybe like that. And that’s how it copied his voice and knew info. Some people call it “attachment cords” this one looks like a clear jelly vibrating blob thing that moves around at medium speed in and out of vision some times sparkles if its close by like on my head. But then I’m like how the fuck did the jelly monster get to the edge of Brooklyn? Like it legit floated 20 miles?

πŸ’©πŸ‡πŸŠπŸš†πŸš„πŸš…β“‚πŸšˆπŸš•πŸš˜πŸšœπŸš βœˆβ›΅πŸš€πŸšβ‰

I hope my ex wasn’t harmed in any way. In the beginning I did so many “cord cutting meditations” because I just wanted whatever this was gone. I blamed my ex, i did. But I kept away from him so this demon wouldn’t make another game out of it. I’m pretty sure he is OK and doing fine. But if he went through a fraction what I went/ going through….. I am so sorry, even though none of this was my fault. I never sent ANYTHING to him in any way. Only trying to get through my own heart ache to move on.

Either way. That’s my theory of the jelly monster I have been seeing floating around the house or stuck in the bathroom. 

Crazy shit right? πŸ™

God……….  Why did I have to get the crazy one? 

I feel like I need a blunt and I don’t even like smoking. 🌴

Why Unrequited Love Killed Me. πŸ’”

I had a love. A great love. I will always cherish. We had a 6 year relationship and still till this day remain good friends. I call him my soul mate. I thought we would be married but since we were queer it never was a big deal to me.

After our break up. I started dating men for the first time. It was a bit disheartening. They were liars or aggressive. 

I met who I call a twin flame (for name sake) and never felt so insecure in a relationship. I didn’t know what we were, I didn’t know how to act and I felt like I was constantly being tested. Which is not my steeez. I don’t test people so I in return expect the same.

There was just so much material and insecurity for this Entity to play off of to manipulate.

People say “you have to love yourself first”, and I do. I mean we all have our ups and downs it’s natural. But I do. I was more heart broken that I did not, could not or haven’t found the reflection of myself. 

I get glimpses here and there. But something comes in and skews it. Usually it is lack of clarity, that lack of clarity or the refusal to do so leads to insecurity. And that insecurity feeds the beasts that lurk hunting for a victim to control.

Essentially, if I felt secure in the relationship with my twin flame the Entity would have never been able to play off of him.

Unrequited love, the insecurity of not seeing the love that I gave reflected back essentially cause my death, spiritual. My innocence was mutilated, sanity diminished. 

I finally became a reflection of the world. 

The Fat Chick

My ex (“twin flame”) false one I guess. But the the Entity that is here ran with the title and play. 

Over our short 6 month interaction things got confusing for me. I had never felt so insecure in my life. I questioned it. I tried with all of my might to keep a clear head. But I never that strongly about anything. I had heard that guys test you….. But still. 

I guess the first time is when he went on about how he would try to talk to models at events and that they didn’t want to talk to him. And he model friends. I didn’t sit with me right.

The next was when he avoided hanging out with me for Valentines day…. Or even texting for that matter. And when had texted everyday all day before that. I got upset and finally stopped waiting and called him and he said he was at a bar drinking with a friend. It just seemed odd. So the growing insecurity raised. It was like a month or two and so I dumped him and went out on two date to get the attention that seemed so impossible for him that day. 

Soon after I missed him. I didn’t know why. I had made him a really awesome low key gift with a nice jar filled with honey from the farm I worked at since he only drank tea. I thought about him. And maybe I thought I over reacted about a holiday. So I contacted him to make a mends.

While I was in the bathroom I heard loud and clear, “you’re jot going to tell him about the rasta?”. No. Lol. But I didn’t know who said it or why. I just sat there on the toilet like WTF. I later became acquainted with the Entity as seen in this blog. 

It was a bunch of little things here and there piling up in very short periods of time. Like when I checked his Facebook and saw one of his friends refer and ask if it was “tinder?” Girl referring to me under a video of a girl loosing her mind on the train (I hadn’t lost it by then). Then his friends would make fun of fat people on his page. But then he told me father was a “fat shamer”. 

In the middle of us see each other he had missed my birthday. And then I had seen this app called happn advertised on Facebook and looked to see what it was and there was a review he made for it a few days after my birthday. I told him. I made a pack to keep my cool ever since the valentine situation. He then asked “well why were you looking at it” and then changed his settings. So I could not see his Google reviews. I wasn’t even looking, Hus a the first to pop up since we were friends on hang outs. 

Then I remember him saying he would bring me to a game or gym. But then he got wierded out and said it was a “sanctuary” for him only to find out later that his ex girlfriend went there too. 

I felt like all we did was have sex and I wasn’t use to that. He tried to take me to a few bars didn’t seem too excited about it. More obligational to prove something that he “wasn’t afraid to be seen with me in public”. But even then i saw him checking out girls in the bar which was awkward and his mood would change. I understood he had a night job and gym and stuff which was important. But I still could not shake it.

On my ex’s birthday the Entity kept trying to convince me to tell him I loved him but it wasn’t time. The Entity went so as far as to to whisper it sounding like my ex was trying to tell me through a whisper or “telepathically”. 

And that’s where I really fucked up.

I believed it. 

It was like all my years of building self confidence went down the drain.

I was super confused and I needed to focus on my job for a couple of weeks and asked him for a break at which point he said we might as well break up. So I diligently accomplished my goals at work. Forced myself not to speak to him for two weeks to detox and hoped to come back with a clear mind. It wasn’t easy. I even told my friend so I would keep myself busy. Once everything at my job was set, I finally contacted him but he waited days before contacting me back and it was right before I was going on a date.

The date was cool. We made out. But I contacted my ex after only to find that he had moved on. 

I didn’t understand why I was feeling like this. It was gross. I gave myself a few months to just feel the feels. But I was obsessed with trying to find out why I felt drawn to someone who treated me like eh just aight.

I contacted him again. We hung out. I had hoped we would work things out and build honesty but everything went south.

I just kept asking myself, “why do I feel like this?” Over and over. I did a forget him spell on myself (didn’t work). Nothing worked. Therapy, throughing myself into my job, dating, fucking, working out. Nothing.

I saw that he had a a few memes on his face book making fun of fat women. Even one where he wrote “first rule of squad is always to accept a challenge” meaning date a fat girl. I saw that he was in a pretty sad group called “I heart chubbies”, and recently guessed that one of his friends put him in that group as a joke. 

It wasn’t until 2016 when things got wild. The Entity posses itself as telepathy between my ex and I foretelling a doing he would send me and the few times he would call. I just wanted to be over him. But the “storyline” this Entity drew up was captivating. The “twin flame” story line that I had to give it all up for my ex… To win him back…… Even my life.

That’s where things took a sharp nose dive into hell.

I guess I got my answer.

This man….. made me insecure enough, vulnerable enough for this Entity to hide behind and try and take not only my lively hood …. But my life. 

I try not to blame my ex too much. I have my own part in being naive on soooooo many fucking levels. I never would have guessed it could be this bad, just from dating a guy or that demons really actually do exist.

And now my ex is prolly chillin fucking the next chick while I’m sitting here being raped every night by some demon.

Shit sucks. 

Soul Sister

So I met another woman on one of the forums who story is WAY WAY too similar as mine.

I almost wanted to cry. I mean I found people with parts or symptoms…. But the exact same thing never. 

Hers was very similar in the sense that it happened after a break up…. She thought it was from her ex because the Demo. Tried to act like her ex (very twin flamish). She’s stayed away from him. She thinks he cursed her. Them the demon told her he loves her but also tortures her. 

She’s knows she is not schizophrenic….. And the fact that our stories if not the words are all too similar is telling. 

I am both happy and depressed. That I fell for it. I’m trying to help her disassociate the demon from her ex because I am pretty sure it has nothing to with him…. I mean sure it plays off the relationship…. But the longer she holds that thought the longer one of the hooks are in. 

Its easy to blame someone else.

A person…. Someone visible. Tangible.

Yes there is this little part of me…. 1% that wonders once this Entity leaves if he will come back because I know I will never contact him. But that 1% could also be the demon….. Because I know I still have so much to worry about…. Like my family…. My livelyhood….. How to make myself happy again. Healing…. Health.