Lemonade πŸ‹

On March 8thh at a staff meeting I was asked who was my inspiration I said my twin sister was. 

My sister and I probably got into a quarrel either prior or sonething and the voice kept saying “You should be nicer to your sister.”

My sister went into the hospital for a sever stroke on March 11th.

I fasted for two weeks in hopes God would hear my cry. I felt like I brought this on my sister by saying that she was my inspiration. That everything I love was being taken away..

A month later (April 11th ish) my sister was transfered to a rehabilitation center uptown where she would say for the next 3 months before coming home while my mental health declined into a poor state. 

My sister is a girly girl…. And she always loved the color yellow and lemons because she always made lemonade out of lemons. She overcame a being told she never walk as a baby, a “learning disability” as a kid and becoming an amazing teacher, and now this stroke. She was scared being in this new place far away.

I was at the height of my delusion. So I thought I was reading minds. So I told my sister if she ever gets scared or worried to call out a code word. I searched for something that only she would know so i told her to say “Lemonade!” in her mind and I will be there. 

Maybe a week later Beyonce dropped the “Lemonade” album on April 23, 2016. I didn’t even bother watching it till much later but I was in shock. I thought my sister was eternally crying out to me from this sign. She was always more Beyonce and I was always more Rihanna fan. Riri’s a little darker…. But I’m becoming a Solange fan more whatever. 

Today I cried watching the Lemonade album. Cause I remembered how I wanted to jump into my sisters body and take on her burden. To fix it for her…   But I can barely fix myself and I would never want her to be in this possessed body. 

Lemonade! πŸƒπŸ‹πŸƒ

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Sun Lamp 🌞

I’m legit thinking about limiting my electronic time and getting a sun lamp until its warm enough to go outside. 

I’m not depressed other that the fact I have endure the pain of this situation. And I already take vitamin D. My mood is only because of this experience other wise I’m pretty happy go lucky. 

saw some affordable ones so I might just ask for one as an early Xmas gift.

My friend who has also experienced this and has confirmed some things for me told me to look into making a DIY Earthing Grounding mat. I was so use to farming barefoot at my old job when I had the chance or being on the beach. Now I guess the best I can do is fake sunlight and fake earthing until I am able to purge these nasty entities.

The prayers I have been doing seem to only make me be attacked harder.

I know we are suppose to be on Gods side but…… The prayer is for protection from these things and to forgive them. But it doesn’t seem to be working soon after I feel sucked dry as if I’m about to die. 

So idk. The Tai Chi by Eric Pilgrem seems decent. But they just come back.

I look forward to having my feet in the sand on a beautiful long island beach soon as I can. 

Archon’s are a disease!

Archon’s are a psycho social spiritual/ etheric disease!

Racism, classism, sexism and misogyny, violence and sexual violence of any nature can be attributed to these beings being allowed to fester.

This is not a pass for anyone. If you do some fucked up shit. Then be accountable if you have any remorse.

But these nasty little ticks are the seeds planted in the minds of our people to keep us divided.

So many have woken up. I meet more and more each day.

We are not the crazy ones. We just see the insanity for what it is.

They will get you on any insecurity and pervert any belief system to gain control.

We need to fight back!

People are out here given people misinformation to play with these asshole as they suck your life force at any opportunity. Fuck that and fuck them!

It does matter if its positive or negative energy as long as you’re ignorant AF it doesn’t matter.

And if you KNOW and you stayed quiet about this shit fuck you! You are apart of the problem and why people are out here committing suicide from seeing visions of torture and child abuse all day.

Its over! Game is fucking OVER!

The Struggle: Our Men: I Love Y’all

I had a nice chat with a dude from one of the schizophrenia forums I’m in.

Actually, I had a few so far, this other guy said he wanted to have a baby with me and I was like UUUUHHHM K. But I got what he meant and just looked past the misogyny and found that he was saying that two people who have this experience making a child I guess in his mind would make a super baby or something.

At this point I would be more worried about spiritually dirty this place is. Earth is like a trap house! But i guess they want us to hate where we live ya know. I guess that’s why they are all super gross and destructive.

When this first happened I thought I had been given the “dude program”, don’t ask me why, with the child abuse stuff and the hypersexuality/sensitivity, I don’t know I guess this was my own terrible assumptions.

Thankfully I met other women, mothers different ages who also struggled with this same program. This same experience. Being called a whore, a child molester, racist thoughts, incest, twisted spiritual beliefs. Just pure insanity.

So I had a nice long talk with this one dude. And I just spewed everything out. Even he thought this was only programming for guys and was thankful I was so upfront and real about this experience. No one wants to be seen as a pervert…. at least not that way. But whatever.

When this first happened I no idea…. cause I thought this was linked to my ex (twin flame). That I was taking on some burden for him. But NO that was another lie to get you to agree to this bullshit torture. But I prayed so hard for our men. 

HOW many of our men go through this silently? Thinking that this IS ACTUALLY apart of their divine programming? OMG I PRAYED SO FUCKING HARD FOR OUR MEN! For the ones who are strong enough to withstand it and those who are weak to fall prey. I’m queer so I guess that makes me like half lesbian…. and I mean there was a lot of issues I did have to work out about men. Just being honest. But to know how many of them hold on to this…. not knowing how to heal it. To shine a light on this issue. Ashamed, guilty and grossed out.

I don’t even know if I should pray for them anymore with all this false light out here parading around as God and angels trying to get anyone they can get at any cost.

I just have a deeper appreciation for men, and the burdens they carry as well. The societal norms, even when you don’t feel like should be a norm, the silence, the facade. Yes, men take up a lot of space but only if they fit the mold you know. Not if you are an outsider.

The false light / dark agenda….. wow! Bravo! They tried to sicken the minds and emotionally isolate our men while enraging the feminine desensitizing and destabilizing us. To keep us apart and out of love and in pain (twin flame separation).

I just have a deep love an appreciation for the good men out here, battling this and even more for those who are woke as fuck trying to wake our people up and battling this in whatever form.

I can’t wait to see us truly rise!

And I can’t wait to find my TRUE equal.

3rd Eye Experiment πŸ‘€πŸ™

Soooooo I’m a weirdo and I’m weird….. So. 

Well…… I was flashing my camera light at the Disc circle entities I always tell you guys about. 

But then I figured let me flash the light on the 3rd Eye. So I put the flash between my brow and there was this black and green curved line and the things that kinda look like a red iris on the far side of my eyes. 

My eyes were close and looking forward.

I even covered one eye to see if it was light peeking in and it was not. 

I then moved my eyes side to side and notices more definition. Of the iris. 

With my eyes close I see a green circle of light. When I flash the light on my third eyes I see RED iris of light. Red is the opposite of green. So there may be an invert of sorts going on. 

I also fill like I pushed something out of my field because I felt a release, but it quickly came back. 

I also put the flashlight on the side and the iris went forward. 

Once everything was cleared I saw a small black floating like spider jelly fish dust ball thing with tenticle. Very similar to some of the shadows I see on the wall. But only certain places. 

I’m not sure what this all means in relation to my experience. Just documenting for later clarity. 

I’m looking at the image, but I’m not to talk understand WHY I see what I see. 

Still gonna research .

Understanding Space: Portal?

So there are a few things going on.

There is what I see, which look like Large Human Cells (sometimes with symbols inside) all around the house. And then there is what i see in Photos. Which seem a little more detailed, in appearance. Then there is what i hear and feel. Which i am not even sure correlates with whats going on.

I have been taking photos over the last 5 days of my house and my body to see if there was any progress. My friend sent me some energy with flowers and that was really nice. But for the most part I still see these….. projections of sorts.

Now i see the circles, and i am wondering if each circle (Human Cell/ Archon Jelly fish i talk about) is directly related to one of the Entity Projections I see. in photos At least the major ones.

So far I see in photos: A medusa/ banshee looking woman, reptilian looking dude, an insectoid (maybe 3), trolls (maybe a few), Buddha looking guy, “Osiris” looking dude with a reptilian under), and MAYBE an Isis near my bed. I see like other little thing here and there, like one that looks like Stitch from lilo and stitch, and a bunch that look like geckos heads, a pig, alien heads and bunch of other things. They all have a ghosty look to them. Almost 2D holographic appearance to them.

The Osiris and Isis are gone now from what i can see. Still see the medusa lady and i know reptilian looking dude is still here, and some crazy gecko things, a troll.

What i see with my eyes: X, O, 8 infinity signs, #, 4 horizontal lines, human cell looking blobs, one with many circles with in each other (sleep one), sometimes an alien head or just eyes, these kinda black spider blobs, My friends smiley face and flower energy she sent me. Most of it is purplish, blue, black or white tone to it.

SO i guess what i am wondering is if what i see (the symbols) are directly related or a portal for each spirit projection i see in photos. 

I am also wondering if this a human sending these entities, talupas, portals or whatever to me as well. Been thinking about this since my friend sent me the smiley face and flowers. 

I live in New York City, so there is bound to be many spirits or whatever these things are. Im not afraid of them, but when they attach to me in any way my energy is zapped and its extremely painful. Half the time i want to eat immediatly after. I don’t know if its just me or my family. If this has been going on before i got here, or if this is something i brought here because i was so sad after a break up.

Im trying to stay a bit logical.

I want to make sure these things are cleared out before i ever choose to leave for my families health. Whatever is here, i can not see being directly from my family to be honest (like a generational curse). And its not like its a loved on that passed on, and they seem to seek to harm.

I really want to clear this for my sister, she has been looking more and more tired lately. Not to mention they threaten all my family, friends and loved ones anytime i figure something out or try a method to get rid of them. My sister is pushing herself to the max to over come this stroke (which for some reason i associate with these entities). So like i really want my family to be ok now that I can see and have a better scope of whats happening or how they move around the house.

I put prayers on all of my mirrors as directed by one website, burned some sage, prayed. I’m trying so hard. This is not fair to my family or anyone if they are trying to hurt me.

I know this stuff sounds crazy, cause it is!!!

It doesnt even seem real. There is some part of it that is real, like the fact that it makes feel like shit everyday. But im not even sure about this ghostly looking projections in the photos.

OK THATS ALL FOR TODAY!!!

 

Talupa’s RevisitedπŸŒΏπŸ‘€πŸŒΏ

So Talupa’s are thought forms. Thought Forms I guess can be created. And can be sent by other people. How I don’t know. 

I can see them. But I dont know how they get there.

My friend sent me a picture and I could see a very sexual female figure in his aura. I have no idea how it got there. I had no judgments as much as the Entity with me tried to push ideas. I told my friend I could see it and confirmed that yes “that’s the one that sins”. And that she said “oh go oh god”. 

My friend suggested that I create a Talupa of my own to handle all the ones sent to me. I see at least 11 in my home and possible 18+ on my body. As well as some other crazy stuff like a bunch of dots. I’m sure I could create one, but I don’t know the full knowledge of doing so I don’t feel comfortable doing so.

I know that when a friend gave me a reading she said my ancestors where druids (not 100% sure about that) and I should call on them to feel safe at this time. That last time I saw my ex I did call in my “ancestors” and I’m pretty sure there was a teddy bear in there, but I think that was because I took an online quize and it said I was a bear totem at the moment. And I might have thought about mermaids as well. Either way….. I don’t see druid, teddy bear or a mermaid anywhere in my house or around my aura….. So I for sure did not create these things that are here. 

I would Google what I see only after I see it. 

The thought form talupas are 2D for the most part they can seem 3d and do have a thickness to them that is visable but usually flat images.

I don’t know how they get here, how someone sends them or how to stop them. 

I told the Talupa(s) that are here to go back to their creator and tell them to clean up this mess. Instead of me trying to figure out how to make one and creating more of a mess in my mothers home. 

If I was it would create a vaccum void that sucked them into nothingness where they could never harm another person again. But I won’t and its not my mess to clean up. 

Its fucked up IF someone truly sent this to my life and mothers home against all free will.

I had a few readings down before this all really got out of hand and one said I was “a play thing” a “lab rat”. I just thought that she was saying my ex was using me. But I’m starting to think its more “spiritual” than anything else. 

Who ever made this mess needs to clean it up NOW!

I am currently not associating it with anyone. I am not judging (well a little bit, OK a lot). But I am most importantly standing firm in the fact who ever this is, for whatever reason needs to clean this up! 

Sprit Snatchers? 😱

A couple of times, I felt like my “spirit” not my soul was being snatched or tugged out of my body. Kinda like a Peter Pan thing (in once upon a time).

I wonder if these Demonic Archon Reptar Alien like need our spirit, our spirit is what I would assume animate us, I guess like energy play dough? 

I feel like maybe they need this energy from us to almost like….. Hmm create something to wear? Like a cloak of spirit imagined to hide whatever it is they truly are?

Or to create this illusion in front of us?

Just wondering. Its theory. I could be wrong.

Infinity 8 🐍

I took numerous photos of me and my house and there are ∞ infinity signs/ouroboros  / 8s all over the photos or like all drawn in my aura, or super imposed and my forehead. There is a hole that looks like an attachment or a star/penragram that is on my forehead as well. (I can show you in private if you want but you can see them in the photos I took in the previous post).

I am currently under serious spiritual attack. I feel like all my interests are being used against me in a satanic manner. Like a bitch can’t like ancient Egyptian mythology with out becoming a satanic sacrifice? 

Who the fuck is doing this and WHY?! 

Ew and why?!

And like I’ve never been one of those people that believed in like illuminiati or like satanic shit. Its like cool some losers want to dress up in capes and drink blood to feel special, but like I didn’t know evil was THIS REAL!

I’m over this shit it so corny and gross. 

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