I have to accept that I died.

I have to accept that my natural state of being has died.

The ME as I know me that just is unfiltered and untainted has died.

The me now has at least 3 demons telling what to do or how to feel all day.

I can’t just BE ME.

This isn’t just a hearing but hearing and directing me and controlling and if I try to override them they try to confuse my thoughts. So we can’t coexist. There is a battle.

So then I am always stuck in battle mode.

So the fun loving happy me I knew is gone dead. I don’t know if she will ever be back again. But I’m grieving hard. I just now realized it.

It’s been two years of standing my ground against these demons. I gave up everything. And lived minimally (ish granted wifi and shit). But you know with out money or my own space and life. I tried everyone’s recommendations with out much change and I see an army of demons around me. ARMY. Different types.

So I just need to accept this.

But I don’t know how to live this way. Not a normal life.

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7 thoughts on “I have to accept that I died.

  1. I’m not sure why someone would “like” this post. What does that mean? Someone is crying out for help it seems and revealing that demons haunt her all day… strange. how did these entities get in? Was it thru some sort of mystical practice or meditation or black magic?

    Like

  2. I also think the “like” means I read it, I hear you, I get you. I know the blogger who liked the post so I appreciate when I feel heard (liked).
    My blog is completely nuts and a series of posts of me trying to understand WHY I am hearing and seeing these demons that want me dead ……. to the point I almost want to give up the fight.

    I am human. I don’t have the stamina of eternity. I’m trying to hold on as much as I can. Suicidal is not as important to me as much as why am I being targeted.

    Like

  3. What if dark entities only attacked those who they deem as powerful and threatening to their agenda, and their strength is to make you feel helpless and weak. But that once you truly understand your inherent power is already within you and that you simply will them away, the test is over.

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    1. Lol well I could REALLY USE SOME HELP HERE! Lol

      I know a lot of people that actual have “powers” and have yet to other than telepathy mixed in “schizophrenia demon voices”.

      I mean it took like 100s of the medium entities set up in my home to mess me up. So any healing work I did on my body was impossible. The healing work would have to be done on the building.

      Unfortunately my power doesn’t get rid of them or even scare them off. lol more so then hate they enjoy ignorance I’ve noticed. It’s not that a person hate (their dark agenda) but WHY they hate which is they being controlled once a person has figured out they are being controlled.

      That’s the threat. When they know themselves well enough to say NO. And live with integrity.

      Like

  4. Sometimes when my kids get really moody or have tantrums, in spite of my desire to keep arguing back n forth, i try to understand why they do what they do and give them love to ameliorate the behavior. You can take a candle into a completely dark room and light it up. My guess is that so much darkness wouldnt be after you unless you had something very powerful and special within you. Light your candle and darkness has no choice but to flee.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you love!!!! I needed that reminder today!

      Seriously.

      I start to believe their 💩 some times like I did something to actually deserve this. And honestly their story has changed 100s of times.

      Sometimes it’s just easier to believe them. Sick isn’t it? I get tired of arguing and going through the mental matrix or sane logic and reason.

      But there is a reason for all of this. And it’s probably has to do with their own benefit and less to my demise. That’s why they have to convince me in a terrible person.

      I really hope we find a way to help others out of these situations.

      Thanks for the spark for my candle! 🙏🏼🙏🏼 ❤️ Shine on!!!

      Like

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