So….. Karma…. Yea….
People warn you about karma, people even wish karma on you (I’ve done it to keep my own peace), we wish good karma for ourselves.
I mean I’ve been a “good person”. I tried not to harm anyone with my actions or words. At least the intention was there 80% of the time. I haven’t found myself in a better situation.
I use to think I must have been a terrible person in a past life to deserve the struggles I have been through. No more… No less than anyone else but the struggles were there.
But this idea that karma comes to get you… Is alluding me… Like there are people who have gotten away with terrible actions … Where’s the karma? Where is them “paying” for what they did?
So… How do we know things aren’t orchestrated? And who’s to say its for our highest good… And the highest good of the planet?
I look at my sister… Beautiful soul…. A teacher … Pushed through all obsticals as a child only to be stricken with a stroke. Is that fucking karma?
When the food and water and air is poisioned crippling our bodies function and ability to make healthy decisions. Karma?
Am I “paying” for my father, my twin flame? The men in my life? When in my own right everything seemed so orchestrated for a “play”. Ironic. So what is karma, other than something we say? How am I suppose to …. Trust that? That I “deserve” to pay for something that was already orchestrated. To what end, mean or satisfaction?
Shits played, its old, its entrapping, its bullshit.
I’m still having a hard time subscribing to this we must suffer to learn our lessons.
Maybe I’m too idealistic. Maybe I just hate to see people suffer as well. There are traps all over.