Curating my life

How am I able to curate my life if I have this negative force (spirit) influencing my discission?

Although I know the difference, for how much longer will I be able to endure? 

How do I build with out having to keep rebuilding every time? Moving on with out everything being burnt to the ground. 

Nothing has ever been stable. Consistent. And while I have learn to roll with punches …. Ride the wave …. There is only some life crisis one can take before you wonder wtf. 

I’ve tried hard … Worked hard… To build something that’s stable, meaningful, joyful and yet soon its just sand in my palm. 

So how do I allow the things in my life that will build a solid foundation… A foundation for health, joy, prosperity, success? Love? 

Love was always my foundation. Whether at work or in personal relationships. But now I’m not sure what love is anymore. I’m not sure what I need in my life to not have to keep rebuilding …. Taking left turns.

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