No one will ever understand the tourment that I go through on a daily basis.
I have no idea what to do. I went though therapy … Meds …. And this curse … This spirit … Won’t go away. I’ve looked at it from every angle. I’ve tried to understand it…… Heal it…. Be at peace with it… Pray for it…. And it won’t go away.
Night and day… Awake or sleep. And it always finds away to slap me in the face. And I am not getting it. To not be or feel like yourself knowing yourself…. Being imprisoned inside of the body …. While something outside of you tourments you for reason I don’t understand.
Is understanding even the point?
For me or for him?
Know thy self?
And I have to go through this alone. No therapist, shaman, prayer, “healthy lifestyle” seems to give relief.
I’ve give up almost everything not to feel this way. Still no relief.